True friendship is like sound health; the value of it is seldom known until it be lost. – Charles Caleb Colton
FOR TODAY – JULY 20th – WEDNESDAY
201st day of 2011 with 164 to follow.
Holidays for Today:
*International Chess Day
* Moon Day (commemorates the day man first walked on the moon)
* Colombia IIndependence Day
*Ugly Truck Day
* National Lollipop Day
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TODAY IN BIRTHDAYS:
- 356 BC Alexander the Great, Greek king of Macedonia and conqueror of Persia
- 1804 Sir Richard Owen, London, England, biologist (best known for coining the word Dinosauria, meaning Terrible Reptile)
- 1919 Sir Edmund Hillary, New Zealand mountain climber (one of 1st two men to scale MT Everest)
- 1933 Cormac McCarthy, Providence, Rhode Island, Southern Gothic, western & post-apocalyptic author (Blood Meridian, Border Trilogy, No Country for Old Men)
- 1938 Diana Rigg, England, actress (Emma Peel-Avengers, Hospital)
- 1938 Natalie Wood [Natasha Gurdin], San Francisco, California, actress (Gypsy, Rebel Without a Cause)
- 1947 Carlos Santana, Mexico, musician (Santana-Black Magic Woman)
- 1947 Gerd Binnig, Frankfurt, Germany, physicist (tunneling microscope-Nobel 1986)
- 1964 Dean Winters, New York City, New York, actor (Oz, Rescue Me, Law & Order)
- 1964 Terri Irwin, Eugene OR, naturalist, widow of Steve Irwin, Animal Planet television personality
- 1978 Charlie Korsmo, Fargo, North Dakota, actor (Dick Tracy, What About Bob, Hook)
- 1978 Elliott Yamin, Los Angeles, California, singer (placed 3rd on 5th season of American Idol)
- 1988 Julianne Hough, Provo Utah, ballroom dancer/ country singer (won 4th season of Dancing With the Stars/partner speed skater Apolo Anton Ohno AND 5th season of DWTS with three-time Indianapolis 500 champion Hélio Castroneves as partner)
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I don’t know the key to success, but the key to failure is trying to please everybody. - Bill Cosby
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HAPPENED THIS DAY IN HISTORY:
- 1807 Nicéphore Niépce is awarded a patent by Napoleon Bonaparte for the Pyréolophore, the world’s first internal combustion engine, after it successfully powered a boat upstream on the river Saône in France.
- 1871 British Columbia becomes 6th Canadian province.
- 1872 Mahlon Loomis receives patent for wireless … the radio is born.
- 1903 Ford Motor Company shipped its first car.
- 1940 Billboard magazine publishes its first “Music Popularity Chart”; the first number one song is Frank Sinatra’s “I’ll Never Smile Again”.
- 1948 First peacetime military draft started by President Harry S. Truman in the US amid increasing tensions with the Soviet Union.
- 1960 Polaris missile successfully launched from submarine, the USS George Washington, for the first time.
- 1969 1st men on Moon, Neil Armstrong & Edwin Aldrin, Apollo 11 lands on the moon.
- 1976 US Viking 1 lands on Mars at Chryse Planitia, 1st Martian landing.
- 1977 Flash flood hits Johnstown, Pennsylvania, kills 80 & causing $350 million damage.
- 1995 Inventure Place, home of the National Inventors Hall of Fame, was dedicated in Akron, Ohio.
- 1999 Falun Gong is banned in the People’s Republic of China, and a large scale crackdown of the practice is launched.
- 2003 Rookie Ben Curtis, ranked 396th in the world, wins British Open, the first golfer to win a major golf tournament on his first try in more than ninety years.
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I was nearing the final stages of my college preparation to become an elementary school teacher. During my Junior Year we were required to visit several classrooms of varying grades to get a feel for what we were getting ourselves into.
Males in elementary education are a rarity and I soon learned that the children thought it was really neat to see a male at school that was not the principal. I will never forget my first visit to a kindergarten class room. These little tots were dying to ask me questions and tell me things about themselves.
One little boy raised his hand and I went over to him. He VERY seriously said, “My granddaddy is going to kill himself.”
Caught COMPLETELY off guard, I struggled for what to say to him. I finally managed, “I’m sure he’s not gonna kill himself.”
He replied, “Oh yes he is…Momma said if he doesn’t quit lifting things that are too heavy, he’s gonna kill himself.”
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We took our first grader on a car trip to Canada. To help pass the time, the boy practiced his new reading skills by calling out road signs. He fell asleep just before we entered Quebec. When he awoke, he saw the French highway signs and shouted
in a worried tone, “I forgot how to read while I was asleep!”
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ONE-LINERS : Top 25 Signs that You’ve Grown Up
Your potted plants stay alive.
You keep more food than beer in the fridge.
6:00 AM is when you get up, not when you go to sleep.
You hear your favorite song on an elevator.
You carry an umbrella. You watch the Weather Channel.
Your friends marry and divorce instead of hookup and breakup.
You go from 130 days of vacation time to 7.
Jeans and a sweater no longer qualify as “dressed up.”
You’re the one calling the police because those darn kids next door don’t know how to turn down the stereo.
You don’t know what time Taco Bell closes anymore.
Your car insurance goes down and your car payments go up.
You feed your dog Science Diet instead of McDonald’s.
Sleeping on the couch makes your back hurt.
You no longer take naps from noon to 6 p.m.
Dinner and a movie = The whole date instead of the beginning of one.
MTV News is no longer your primary source for information.
A $4.00 bottle of wine is no longer “pretty good stuff.”
You actually eat breakfast foods at breakfast time.
Grocery lists are longer than macaroni and cheese, diet Pepsi and Ho-Ho’s.
“I just can’t drink the way I used to” replaces “I’m never going to drink that much again.”
Over 90% of the time you spend in front of a computer is for real work.
You don’t drink at home to save money before going to a bar.
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A golfer hooks his tee shot over a hill and onto the next fairway. Walking toward his ball, he sees a man lying on the ground, groaning with pain.
“I’m an attorney,” the wincing man says, “and this is going to cost you $5000.”
“I’m sorry, I’m really sorry. But I did yell ‘fore’.”
“I’ll take it.”
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cartoon of the day: Keep Breathing!
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The day after a verdict had been entered against his client, the lawyer rushes to the judge’s chambers, demanding that the case be reopened. “I have new evidence that makes a huge difference in my client’s defense.”
“What new evidence could you have?”
“I’ve learned that my client has $10,000 that I didn’t know about.”
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The Little League tournament was extremely challenging and the competition was intense. The coach felt the need to remind one of his players about the importance of team play and good sportsmanship. He asked the player, “Do you know what good sportsmanship is?”
“Yes.”
“You know that you shouldn’t curse at the umpire or throw things in anger?”
“Yes.”
“Good. Now could you please go tell your parents?”
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WARNING! ENTERING THE PUN ZONE!
What did the duck say when she bought some lipstick?
Put it on my bill.
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Where does an ape sleep?
In an apricot.
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NASA recently published a new photograph of distant galaxies colliding. Of course, astronomers have had pictures of colliding galaxies for quite some time now, but with the vastly improved resolution provided by the Hubble Space Telescope, you can actually see the lawyers rushing to the scene.
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A minister and lawyer were chatting at a party.
“What do you do if you make a mistake on a case?” the minister asked.
“Try to fix it if it’s big; ignore it if it’s insignificant,” replied the lawyer. “What do you do?”
The minister replied “Oh, more or less the same. Let me give you an example. The other day I meant to say ‘the devil is the father of liars,’ but instead I said ‘the devil is the father of lawyers,’ so I let it go.”
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One day a Pirate and a bartender were talking to each other in a bar. The Bartender asked the pirate “Where did ya get that peg leg from?”
The Pirate responded ” We were sailing the seas when a big ol’ shark came up to me while I was swimmin’ and bit off me leg.”
Later the Bartender asked “Where did you get that hook then?”
The pirate responded “Well, me crew and I were in a battle and it got cut through the bone.”
The bartender then asked ” Then where did ya get the eye patch from?”
The pirate said ” In a harbor I looked at a gull flying over head and it took a dump right in me eye.”
The bartender was puzzled and asked the pirate, “How would that make you get an eye patch?”
The pirate responded, “First day with the hook.”
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TODAY IN TRIVIA: LOLLIPOP
-It was in June 25, 2002 when the world’s largest lollipop was made. It was as tall as a Giraffe (15 feet tall) and about the weight of 23 full grown tigers.
- The modern lollipop machines make 5,900 a minute; the original machine only produces 40 lollipops.
- The national lollipop day is July 20th.
-Lollipops were first made in 1908, in Connecticut by George Smith. He had named it after a horse that was all in the mind, Lolly Pop.
- Lollipops are known as Suckers in the Midwest.
- There is a flavor named “A and B only”.
- George Smith trademarked the word Lollipop in the year 1931.
-Charles Dickens invented the first modern Lollipop.
-Lollipops are made out of corn syrup and flavors.
-Lollipops were first produced in large scale (for commercial use) in the 1920s.
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LIFE LESSON: Life is not the amount of breaths you take. It’s the moments that take your breath away. – Will Smith from Hitch
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QUIP OF THE DAY: Sorry, Boss, I can’t do that. My powers can only be used for good.
THAT’S (ALMOST) ALL FOLKS!
THE LAST WORD: Three Rules of Work:
1. Out of clutter, find simplicity.
2. From discord, find harmony.
3. In the middle of difficulty lies opportunity. – Albert Einstein
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