Every day is a good day. -Yun-Men
FOR TODAY – AUGUST 10th – WEDNESDAY
222nd day of 2011 with 143 to follow.
Holidays for Today:
*Banana Split Day
*National S’mores Day
*Lazy Day
*International Biodiesel Day
*Chemistry Set Volcano Day
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TODAY IN BIRTHDAYS:
- 1602 Gilles de Roberval, Roberval, Oise, France, mathematician (Roberval Balance & Coining the term ‘trochoid’)
- 1839 Aleksandr Stoletov,Vladimir, Russia, physicist (founder of electrical engineering)
- 1856 William Willett, English inventor of Daylight Saving Time
- 1874 Herbert Clark Hoover, West Branch, Iowa, (R) 31st President (1929-1933)
- 1889 Charles Darrow, Inventor (Monopoly game)
- 1902 Arne Tiselius, Stockholm, Sweden, chemist (Electrophoresis)
- 1908 Rica Erickson, Boulder, Western Australia, naturalist and botanic (The Misfortunes of Phoebe. Hesperian Press)
- 1909 Leo Fender, Fullerton, California, luthier (Fender Musical Instruments)
- 1913 Wolfgang Paul, Lorenzkirch, Saxony, Germany, physicist (Ion traps)
- 1913 Noah Beery, Jr., New York City, New York, actor (The Spikes Gang, The Best Little Whorehouse in Texas, Waltz Across Texas)
- 1928 Jimmy Dean, Plainview, Texas, actor/singer (Jimmy Dean Show/ Jimmy Dean Sausage)
- 1943 Ronnie Spector, New York City, New York, singer (The Ronettes)
- 1943 Louise Forestier, New York City, New York, French Canadian singer, songwriter and actress (La Prison de Londres)
- 1943 Jimmy Griffin, Cincinnati, Ohio, guitarist (Bread)
- 1960 Antonio Banderas, Spanish actor (Puss in Boots in Shrek, The Legend of Zorro)
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Friendship with oneself is all important, because without it one cannot be friends with anyone else in the world. - Eleanor Roosevelt
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HAPPENED THIS DAY IN HISTORY:
- 610 In Islam, the traditional date of the Laylat al-Qadr, when Muhammad began to receive the Qur’an.
- 1519 Ferdinand Magellan’s five ships set sail from Seville to circumnavigate the globe. Second in command Sebastian Elcano, Basque navigator, completes the expedition after Magellan’s death in the Philippines.
- 1821 Missouri admitted as 24th US state.
- 1846 Smithsonian Institution is chartered by the U.S. Congress after $500,000 was given by scientist James Smithson.
- 1893 Rudolf Diesel’s prime model runs on its own power for the first time. Because of this, August 10 is the International Biodiesel Day.
- 1932 A 5.1kg (11.2-pound) chondrite-type meteorite breaks into at least seven pieces and lands near the town of Archie in Cass County, Missouri.
- 1944 World War II: American forces defeat the last Japanese troops on Guam.
- 1948 Candid Camera makes its television debut after being on radio for a year as Candid Microphone.
- 1978 Three members of the Ulrich family were killed in an accident. This accident lead to the famous Ford Pinto litigation.
- 1990 The Magellan space probe reaches Venus.
- 1993 An earthquake measuring 7.0 on the Richter Scale hits the South Island of New Zealand.
- 1995 Oklahoma City bombing: Timothy McVeigh and Terry Nichols are indicted for the bombing. Michael Fortier pleads guilty in a plea-bargain agreement for his testimony.
- 2003 The highest temperature ever recorded in the UK – 38.5°C (101.3°F) in Kent. It is the first time the UK has recorded a temperature over 100 degrees Fahrenheit.
- 2003 Yuri Malenchenko becomes the first person to marry in space.
- 2006 Scotland Yard disrupts major terrorist plot to destroy aircraft traveling from the United Kingdom to the United States. All toiletries are banned from commercial airplanes.
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A man and a woman who have never met before find themselves in the same sleeping carriage of a train. After the initial embarrassment they both go to sleep, the man on the top bunk, the woman on the lower.
In the middle of the night the man leans over, wakes the woman and says, “I’m sorry to bother you, but I’m awfully cold and I was wondering if you could possibly get me another blanket?”
The woman leans out and, with a glint in her eye, says, ” I have a better idea, just for tonight, let’s pretend that we’re married.”
The man says happily, “OK!” AWESOME!”
The woman says, “GOOD ….get your own dang blanket!!!”
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Betty came home to her husband one afternoon and exclaimed, “Honey! Pack your bags! I won the lottery!!!”
He said, “Really?!? Wow! What should I pack for? Hawaii? A cruise? Europe?”
“I don’t care,” she replied, ” just get yourself out of here.”
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ONE-LINERS :
~If the funeral procession is at night, do folks drive with their lights off?
~When companies ship Styrofoam, what do they pack it in?
~If you’re cross-eyed and have dyslexia, can you read all right?
~If a stealth bomber crashes in a forest, will it make a sound?
~If the cops arrest a mime, do they tell him he has the right to remain silent?
~If a parsley farmer is sued, can they garnish his wages?
~When it rains, why don’t sheep shrink?
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Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson were on a camping and hiking trip. They had gone to bed and were lying there looking up at the sky. Holmes said,
‘Watson, look up. What do you see?’
‘Well, I see thousands of stars.’
‘And what does that mean to you?’
‘Well, I guess it means we will have another nice day tomorrow. What does it mean to you, Holmes?’
‘To me, it means someone has stolen our tent.’
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pic of the day: “What are YOU lookin’ at?” says the guinea pig!
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A Scotsman was shipwrecked and finally washed ashore on a small island. As he regains consciousness on the beach, he sees a beautiful unclad nymphet standing over him. She asks, ”Would you like some food?” The Scot hoarsely croaks, ”Och, lassie, I havna’ ittin a bite in a week noo and I am verra hungry!”
She disappears into the woods and quickly comes back with a heaping helping of haggis. When he has choked it down, she asks, ”Would you like something to drink?” ”Och, aye! That haggis has made me verra hungry and I wad verra much like a drink!” She goes off into the woods again and returns with a bottle of 75-year-old single-malt Scotch whiskey.
The Scotsman is beginning to think that he’s in heaven when the unclad nymphet leans closer and says, ”Would you like to play around?” ”Och, lassie, don’t tell me ye’ve got a golf course here too!”
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A hurricane blew across the Caribbean. It didn’t take long for the expensive yacht to be swamped by high waves, sinking without a trace. There were only two survivors: the boat’s owner Dr. Eskin and its steward Benny who managed to swim to the closest island.
After reaching the deserted strip of land, the steward was crying and very upset that they would never be found. The other man was quite calm, relaxing against a tree.
‘Dr. Eskin, Dr. Eskin, how can you be so calm?’ cried the Benny. ‘We’re going to die on this lonely island. We’ll never be discovered here.’
‘Sit down and listen to what I have to say, Benny,’ began the confident Dr. Eskin. ‘Five years ago I gave the United Way $500,000. and another $500,000. to the United Jewish Appeal. I donated the same amounts four years ago. And, three years ago, since I did very well in the stock market, I contributed $750,000. to each. Last year business was good, so the two charities each got a million dollars.’
‘So what?’ shouted Benny.
‘Well, it’s time for their annual fund drives, and I know they’re going to find me,’ smiled Dr. Eskin.
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WARNING! ENTERING THE PUN ZONE!
A noted biologist, who had been studying little green frogs in a swamp, was stumped. The frog population, despite efforts at predator control, was declining at an alarming rate.
A chemist at a nearby college came up with a solution: The frogs, due to a chemical change in the swamp water, simply couldn’t stay coupled long enough to reproduce successfully.
The chemist then brewed up a new adhesive to assist the frogs’ togetherness, which included one part sodium.
It seems the little green frogs needed some monosodium glue to mate
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The Smith’s were proud of their family tradition. Their ancestors had come to America on the Mayflower. They had included Senators and Wall Street wizards.
They decided to compile a family history, a legacy for their children and grandchildren. They hired a fine author. Only one problem arose – how to handle that great-uncle George, who was executed in the electric chair.
The author said he could handle the story tactfully.
The book appeared. It said “Great-uncle George occupied a chair of applied electronics at an important government institution, was attached to his position by the strongest of ties, and his death came as a great shock.”
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A man is out doing his Christmas shopping as stops at the perfume counter.
Looking a little worried at the brands like “My Sin”, “Desire”, and “Ecstasy”, he says to the salesperson, “I don’t want to get emotionally involved… I just want to get her something that smells nice.”
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TODAY IN TRIVIA: you must have at least 1 banana a day..
~ A cluster of bananas is called a hand and consists of 10 to 20 bananas – known as FINGERS
~The riper the banana the sweeter it will taste! Go for the very ripe one.
~Banana plants, a plant that has non- woody stem. They are of similar family with lilies, orchids and palms.
~Oh yeah! It’s America’s #1 fruit.
~They are grown in Latin and South America from countries like Costa Rica, Ecuador, Colombia, Honduras, Panama and Guatemala.
~Bananas were legitimately introduced to the American public at the 1876 Philadelphia Centennial Exhibition.
~In 1516, Friar Tomas sailed to the Caribbean bringing banana roots with him. After then he started planting bananas in the rich, fertile soil of the tropics. That is the beginning the banana’s future in American life.
~ There is beer brewed from bananas in Eastern Africa.
~ “nasi lemak” – an Indian banana leaf rice.
~The phrase ‘going bananas’ was first recorded in the Oxford English Dictionary, and is linked to the fruit’s ‘comic’ connections with monkeys.
~Bananas contain substance that improves mood and generally make you feel happier. Good to eat in the morning!
~ Banana leaf (rub the area with the inside of the banana skin) amazingly successful on reducing swelling and irritation of a mosquito bite.
~To quit smoking is a hard thing to do! But bananas can in some way, make it easy for you. The B6, B12 they contain, as well as the potassium and magnesium found in them, help the body recover from the effects of nicotine withdrawal.
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LIFE LESSON: Sometimes it’s easy to feel like you’re the only one in the world who’s struggling, who’s frustrated, or unsatisfied, or barely getting by. But that feelings a lie. And if you just hold on, just find the courage to face it all for another day and someone, or something, will find you and make it all okay. Because we all need a little help sometimes. Someone to help us hear the music in our world. To remind us that it won’t always be this way. That someone is out there, and that someone will find you. – One Tree Hill
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QUIP OF THE DAY: We have 40 million reasons for failure but not a single excuse. – Rudyard Kipling
THAT’S (ALMOST) ALL FOLKS!
THE LAST WORD: Every exit is an entry somewhere else. - Tom Stoppard
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