There are better things ahead than any we leave behind. – C.S. Lewis
FOR TODAY – AUGUST 19th – FRIDAY
231st day of 2011 with 134 to follow.
Holidays for Today:
*Aviation Day
*Potato Day
*Hot & Spicy Food Day
~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*
TODAY IN BIRTHDAYS:
- 1646 John Flamsteed, Denby, Derbyshire, England, first English Aronomer Royal
- 1871 Orville Wright, Dayton OH, aviator (Wright Brothers)
- 1686 Eustace Budgell, St Thomas near Exeter, Devon, England, writer (The Spectator)
- 1902 Ogden Nash, Rye, NY, humorous poet (I’m a Stranger Here Myself)
- 1906 Philo T. Farnsworth, Utah, inventor (electronic TV, Farnsworth–Hirsch Fusor)
- 1909 Joseph G(ilbert) Hoffman, American physicist and biophysicist (Manhattan Project, atomic isotopes used to the battle cancer)
- 1913 John Argyris, Volos, Greece , aeronautical engineer, one of the creators of the Finite Element Method
- 1921 Gene Roddenberry, El Paso, Texas, executive producer (Star Trek)
- 1935 F Story Musgrave, Boston, Maryland, doctor, retired astronaut (STS 6, 51-F, 33, 44, 61, 80) public speaker
- 1938 Diana Muldaur, NYC, actress (McCloud, Star Trek Next Gen, LA Law)
- 1939 Alan Baker, London, England, British mathematician (Transcendental Number Theory)
- 1942 Fred Thompson, Sheffield, Alabama, politician and actor (Senator from TN 1994-2003/ Law & Order, Life on Mars)
- 1944 Charles Wang, Chinese-born philanthropist (co-founder of Computer Associates International)
- 1946 William Jefferson “Bill” Clinton, Hope, Arkansas, 42nd US President (D, 1993-01)
- 1947 Gerald McRaney, Collins, Mississippi, actor (Simon and Simon, Major Dad)
- 1952 Jonathan Frakes, Bellefont PA, actor / director (Commander William T Riker-Star Trek NG)
- 1965 Kyra Sedgwick, New York City, New York, actress (The Closer, Singles, Something to Talk About, Phenomenon)
- 1965 Kevin Dillon, Mamaroneck, New York, actor (Entourage)
- 1988 Travis Tedford, Rockwall, Texas, actor (The Final )
- 1998 Ella Guevara, Quezon City, Philippines, Filipino actress (StarStruck Kids)
~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*
Never leave that till to-morrow which you can do to-day. – Benjamin Franklin
~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*
HAPPENED THIS DAY IN HISTORY:
- 1612 The “Samlesbury witches”, three women from the Lancashire village of Samlesbury, England, are put on trial, accused for practising witchcraft, one of the most famous witch trials in English history.
- 1768 Saint Isaac’s Cathedral is founded in Saint Petersburg, Russia.
- 1848 New York Herald breaks the news to the East Coast of the United States of the gold rush in California (although the rush started in January).
- 1919 Afghanistan gains full independence from the United Kingdom.
- 1934 The first All-American Soap Box Derby is held in Dayton, Ohio.
- 1940 First flight of the B-25 Mitchell medium bomber.
- 1953 Cold War: the CIA helps to overthrow the government of Mohammed Mossadegh in Iran and reinstate the Shah Mohammad Reza Pahlavi.
- 1960 Francis Gary Powers convicted of spying by USSR (U-2 incident).
- 1960 Sputnik 5 carries dogs Belka and Strelka, 40 mice, 2 rats and a variety of plants into orbit (later recovered alive).
- 1965 Japanese prime minister Eisaku Sato becomes the first post-World War II sitting prime minister to visit Okinawa.
- 1990 Leonard Bernstein conducts his final concert, ending with Ludwig van Beethoven’s Symphony No. 7.
- 1991 Collapse of the Soviet Union, August Coup: Soviet President Mikhail Gorbachev is placed under house arrest while on holiday in the town of Foros, Crimea.
- 1991 Hurricane Bob hits the Northeast, United States.
- 2003 A car-bomb attack on United Nations headquarters in Iraq kills the agency’s top envoy Sergio Vieira de Mello and 21 other employees.
- 2005 The first-ever joint military exercise between Russia and China, called Peace Mission 2005 begins.
- 2009 A series of bombings in Baghdad, Iraq, kills 101 and injures 565 others.
~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*
A German, an Italian, and a goofy American were trying to get into the stadium at the Sydney Olympics, but the seats were all sold out. The enterprising German stripped down to his shorts and undershirt, picked up a cane fishing pole in a nearby alley, and marched right in stating boldly, “Heinrich Schneider, Germany, Pole Vault.”
Noting the ease of entry, the Italian took off his outer garments, grabbed a large round stone, then just as boldly strode in the gate, announcing, “Pasquale Galento, Italy, Shot Put.”
Not to be outdone, the American guy took off all but his BVD’S, went into a nearby hardward store were he purchased some barb-wire. As he approached the gate the American spoke out confidently, “Hans Dumbkopfski, USA, Fencing.”
~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*
One day this rich guy was having a party at his house. He was loaded, and he had everything: money, a big house in Beverly Hills, drugs, girls, cars, planes — anything he wanted. The guy was also a little eccentric, and he had filled his pool with crocodiles.
So there he was, he and his friends all standing around drinking, getting high and partying next to the pool. The guy gets up on the lifeguard tower and all his friends look up.
He calls for silence and says, “OK, the first person that swims across my pool will get all my money.”
No one moves. The guy looks over the crowd, draws on his joint and says, ” OK, the first person that swims across my pool gets all my money and my house.”
Still no one moves. “OK then, the first person that swims across my pool gets all my money, my house and all my cars and planes.”
Still, no one moves, not even a eye blinks this time. “OK then, all my money, my house, all my cars, all my planes, all the dope you can handle, all my property, all my stocks and bonds and investments and all the girls you can handle: everything I own.”
“Splash!” Someone’s in the pool.
Crocodiles are all over him, but he rolls over like Tarzan — he’s all over the place, fighting and dodging. Finally he gets out of the pool on the other side.
The rich guy on the tower jumps down and runs over to him. “That was incredible! I never thought that I would ever see that done. Do you want the money now or later?”
“I don’t want the money.”
“Do you want the house now or later?”
“I don’t want the house.”
“Do you want the cars and planes now or later? ”
“I don’t want the cars or planes.”
“Do you want the bonds, stocks and stuff now or later?”
“I don’t want that either.”
“Do you want the drugs now or later?”
“I don’t want the drugs.”
“Do you want the girls now or later?”
“I don’t want the girls.”
The rich guy looks at him and says “Well, what DO you want?!?!”
“I want the so-and-so that pushed me in!”
~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*
ONE-LINERS : Stupid Science Test Answers
1. H2O is hot water, and CO2 is cold water.
2. To collect fumes of sulphur, hold a deacon over a flame in a test tube.
3. When you smell an oderless gas, it is probably carbon monoxide.
4. Water is composed of two gins, Oxygin and Hydrogin. Oxygin is pure gin. Hydrogin is water and gin.
5. A super saturated solution is one that holds more than it can hold.
6. Liter: A nest of young puppies.
7. Magnet: Something you find crawling all over a dead cat.
8. Momentum: What you give a person when they are going away.
9. Vacuum: A large, empty space where the pope lives.
10. Artificial insemination is when the farmer does it to the cow instead of the bull.
11. The pistol of the flower is its only protection against insects.
12. A fossil is an extinct animal. The older it is, the more extinct it is.
13. To remove dust from the eye, pull the eye down over the nose.
14. For a nosebleed: Put the nose much lower that the heart until the heart stops.
15. For head colds: use an agonizer to spray the nose until it drops in your throat.
16. Germinate: To become a naturalized German.
17. The tides are a fight between the Earth and moon. All water tends towards the moon, because there is no water on the moon, and nature abhors a vacuum. I forget where the sun joins in this fight.
18. Blood flows down one leg and up the the other.
~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*
While sports fishing off the Florida coast, a tourist capsized his boat. He could swim, but his fear of alligators kept him clinging to the overturned craft. Spotting an old beachcomber standing on the shore, the tourist shouted,
‘Are there any gators around here?’
‘Naw,’ the man hollered back, ‘they ain’t been around for years!’ Feeling safe, the tourist started swimming leisurely toward the shore. About halfway there he asked the guy, ‘How’d you get rid of the gators?’
‘We didn’t do nothin’,’ the beachcomber said. ‘
Really?’ said the tourist.
The beachcomber added, ‘The sharks got ‘em.’
~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*
pic of the day: Flying Tiger Plane at Naval Aviantion Museum in Pensacola, Florida
~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*
A man walks into a bar with his dog and goes up to the bartender and says, ” I bet you $50 that my dog can talk!”
The bartender laughing at the man says, “Okay, you’re on pal!”
So the man asks his dog, “What is on top of a house?” and the dog replies back “Woof”
The man satisfied with the dog’s answer says, “There my dog talked!”
The bartender then says ” No, he didn’t he just barked! You owe me $50!”
The man gives the bartender his $50 and storms out of the bar.
The next day, the man comes back with the same dog and says to the bartender, “Okay now I bet you $100 that my dog can talk!”
The bartender laughs at him again and says ” Okay, you’re on!”
The man then asks his dog, ” Who is the greatest baseball player ever?”
And the dog replies “Woof!”
The man shouts at the bartender “There my dog talked! He said Ruth, Babe Ruth”
The bartender replies back furiously,” No, he didn’t he just barked! You owe me $100!”
The man disappointed give the bartender $100 and walked out of the bar.
While the man and dog were walking down the street the dog looks up at the man and says, ” Hey, you think I should have said Sammy Sosa?”
~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*
Leaving Montreal, I decided to stop at one of those rest areas on the side of the road.
I go into the washroom. The first stall is taken, so I go into the second stall. I had just sat down when I hear a voice from the other stall…………
Hi there, how is it going?
Okay, I am not the type to strike up conversations with strangers in washrooms on the side of the road. I didn’t know what to say, so finally I say:
-Not bad…………
Then the voice says: So, what are you doing?
I am starting to find this a bit weird, but I say: – Well, I’m going back east……………
Then I hear the person, all flustered, say:
Look, I’ll call you back–every time I ask you a question this idiot in the next stall keeps answering.
~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*
WARNING! ENTERING THE PUN ZONE!
This guy, Artie, gets tired of working so hard and not getting anywhere, and seeing all these guys in the Mafia in their fine three piece suits and fancy cars, decides that he has to join the Mafia.
He goes up to one of the guys and says, ” I want to join the Mafia.”
The guy answers, ” You ever kill any one for money?”
Artie answers, “No.”
The guy says, ” Well, you either got to be born into the mafia, or you gotta kill somebody for money.”
So Artie says, ” How much will you pay me?”
The guy says, ” I’m not gonna pay you.”
Artie says, ” C’mon, just pay me a dollar so I can get in.”
The guy says, ” Okay, I’ll tell you what. You kill somebody, tell me about it, and if I see it in the morning paper, I’ll pay you a dollar.”
Artie says, ” Oh thank you, thank you!” and heads off on his mission. He goes to Ralphs Supermarket, sees an old lady pushing a cart, and decides that she’s lived a full life, goes up to her, grabs her round the neck and chokes her to death.
The bag boy sees him, and chases after him. Artie realizes that he can’t out run the bag boy, turns around, grabs the bag boy by the neck and chokes him to death.
In the morning paper the headlines read, ” ARTIE CHOKES TWO FOR A DOLLAR AT RALPHS!”
~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*
A guy walks into a bar with a small dog. The bartender says, “Get out of here with that dog!”
The guy says, “But this isn’t just any dog… this dog can play the piano!”
The bartender replies, “Well, if he can play that piano, you both can stay… and have a drink on the house!”
So the guy sits the dog on the piano stool, and the dog starts playing. Ragtime, Mozart… and the bartender and patrons are enjoying the music.
Suddenly a bigger dog runs in, grabs the small dog by the scruff of the neck, and drags him out. The bartender asks the guy, “What was that all about?”
The guy replies, “Oh, that was his mother. She wanted him to be a doctor.”
~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*
A Scout Master was teaching his boy scouts about survival in the desert. ”What are the three most important things you should bring with you in case you get lost in the desert?” he asked. Several hands went up, and many important things were suggested such as food, matches, etc. Then one little boy in the back eagerly raised his hand. ”Yes, Timmy, what are the three most important things you would bring with you?” asked the Scout Master. Timmy replied, ”A compass, a canteen of water, and a deck of cards.”
”Why’s that Timmy?”
”Well,” answered Timmy, ”the compass is to find the right direction, the water is to prevent dehydration…”
”And what about the deck of cards?” asked the Scout Master.
”Well, Sir, as soon as you start playing Solitaire, someone is bound to come up behind you and say, ”Put that red nine on top of that black ten!”
~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*
TODAY IN TRIVIA: HOT and SPICY foods are Indonesian’s favorite!
~Many people thinks that Indonesian staple food is rice. Actually, every local ethnic in Indonesia had their own staple food until around 60′s when the ‘New Order’ regime ruled the country and standardized the staple food to rice.
~Now, since rice has been the main staple food for Indonesian, many Indonesian thinks they haven’t really had meal before they eat rice. Even if they have eaten ‘lontong’ or ‘ketupat’ which is made from rice too.
~If you are in Central Java, ordering tea in restaurants means you’re ordering sweet tea. If you want your tea without sugar, you have to be very specific about it.
~Indonesian loves hot and spicy foods. Their standard for ‘hot and spicy’ is higher than most people in the world, so for those who isn’t familiar with Indonesian food should be specific about the ‘mildness’, just to be safe.
~Because Indonesian loves hot and spicy foods, they usually bring their own sambal (chili sauce) when they’re travelling to another country.
~And, because Indonesian loves hot and spicy food, the raise of the chili price can make a headline on the news.
~”Have you eaten yet?” is the most common courtesy for Indonesians when they meet each other. No matter what time it is.
~Food, is the main reason why most Indonesian who lives in other country suffers the homesickness.
~Indonesian loves food, and talking. Although talking while eating considered impolite, but bringing the ‘food’ topics in every conversation is always welcomed.
~Indonesian can celebrate everything with food. Even in the fasting month, they celebrate it with “buka puasa bersama” (breaking the fast together).
~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*
LIFE LESSON: Never let your head hang down. Never give up and sit down and grieve. Find another way. And don’t pray when it rains if you don’t pray when the sun shines. – Leroy “Satchel” Paige
~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*
QUIP OF THE DAY: You’re not drunk if you can lie on the floor without holding on. – Dean Martin
THAT’S (ALMOST) ALL FOLKS!
THE LAST WORD: Confront the dark parts of yourself, and work to banish them with illumination and forgiveness. Your willingness to wrestle with your demons will cause your angels to sing. Use the pain as fuel, as a reminder of your strength. – August Wilson
Related Posts :
Related posts:
{ 3 trackbacks }