Self-confidence is the first requisite to great undertakings. – Samuel Johnson
FOR TODAY – OCTOBER 6th – THURSDAY
279th day of 2011 with 86 to follow.
Holidays for Today:
*Come and Take it Day
*Mad Hatter Day
*Physician Assistant Day
*National Noodle Day
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TODAY IN BIRTHDAYS:
- 1803 Heinrich Wilhelm Dove, Liegnitz, German physicist, the first to measure the strength of an electrical current in a wire induced by a collapsing magnetic field
- 1831 Richard Dedekind , Braunschweig, Duchy of Brunswick, German mathematician, known for Abstract algebra, Algebraic number theory, Real numbers
- 1846 George Westinghouse, Central Bridge, New York, engineer and inventor (invented the railway air brake and was a pioneer of the electrical industry / alternating current)
- 1866 Reginald Fessenden, East Bolton, Quebec, Canada, born inventor and radio pioneer, known for Inventing the Radiotelephony
- 1903 Ernest Walton, Dungarvan, Ireland, physicist, known for The first disintegration of an atomic nucleus by artificially accelerated protons (“splitting the atom”)
- 1931 Riccardo Giacconi, Genoa, Italy, physicist, laid the foundations of X-ray astronomy
- 1940 Ellen Travolta, Englewood, New Jersey, actress (Happy Days)
- 1943 Michael Durrell, Brooklyn, New York, actor (Matlock, The Guiding Light, Shannon, V, Alice, Chiefs)
- 1950 David Brin, Glendale, California, sci-fi author (Uplift Universe stories, The Postman, Earth, Glory Season, Kiln People, Foundation’s Triumph)
- 1951 Kevin Cronin, Evanston, Illinois, musician (REO Speedwagon)
- 1956 Kathleen Webb, Puyallup, Washington, comic book writer & artist (Archie comics, Gospel Light Publications)
- 1958 Joseph Finder, Chicago, Illinois, author (High Crime, Paranoia, Company Man, Power Play)
- 1973 Jeff Davis, Los Angeles, California, comedian (Whose Line is it Anyway?)
- 1974 Jeremy Sisto, Grass Valley, California, actor (Clueless, Suicide Kings, Thirteen and Jesus)
- 1977 Melinda Doolittle, St. Louis, Missouri, singer and recording artist (Top 3 on American Idol season 6)
- 1982 Michael Arden, Midland, Texas, actor (Bride Wars)
- 1984 Joanna Pacitti, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania, actress and singer (lead vocalist in the band City (Comma) State)
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Sometimes one creates a dynamic impression by saying something, and sometimes one creates as significant an impression by remaining silent. – Dalai Lama
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HAPPENED THIS DAY IN HISTORY:
- 1762 Seven Years’ War: conclusion of the Battle of Manila between Britain and Spain, which resulted in the British occupation of Manila for the rest of the war.
- 1854 The Great fire of Newcastle and Gateshead starts shortly after midnight, leading to 53 deaths and hundreds injured.
- 1884 The Naval War College of the United States Navy is founded in Newport, Rhode Island.
- 1889 Thomas Edison shows his first motion picture.
- 1927 “Jazz Singer,” first movie with a sound track premiered in New York City.
- 1945 Billy Sianis and his pet billy goat are ejected from Wrigley Field during Game 4 of the 1945 World Series of baseball.
- 1966 LSD became illegal in California, with the rest of the U.S. and the world soon following the ban.
- 1977 The first prototype of the MiG-29, designated 9-01, makes its maiden flight.
- 1979 Pope John Paul II becomes the first pontiff to visit the White House.
- 1981 Anwar al-Sadat, president of Egypt, is assassinated.
- 1995 51 Pegasi is discovered to be the first major star apart from the Sun to have a planet (and extrasolar planet) orbiting around it.
- 1996 Singers Faith Hill and Tim McGraw married in Rayville, Louisiana after touring on their Spontaneous Combustion Tour.
- 2007 Jason Lewis completes the first human-powered circumnavigation of the globe.
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These are classified ads, which were actually placed in a U.K. newspaper:
FREE YORKSHIRE TERRIER.
8 years old.
Hateful little dog.
Bites!
FREE PUPPIES.
1/2 Cocker Spaniel, 1/2 sneaky neighbour’s dog.
FREE PUPPIES.
Mother is a Kennel Club registered German Shepherd.
Father is a Super Dog, able to leap tall fences in a single bound.
JOINING NUDIST COLONY!
Must sell washer and dryer �100.
WEDDING DRESS FOR SALE.
Worn once by mistake.
Call Stephanie.
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A truck driver was driving along on the freeway. A sign comes up that reads “Low bridge ahead.” Before he knows it the bridge is right ahead of him and he gets stuck under the bridge. Cars are backed up for miles.
Finally, a police car comes up. The cop gets out of his car and walks around to the truck driver, puts his hands on his hips and says, “Got stuck huh?”
The truck driver says, “No, I was delivering this bridge and ran out of gas.”
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ONE-LINERS : Useful Work Phrases
1. Thank you. We’re all refreshed and challenged by your unique point of view.
2. The fact that no one understands you doesn’t mean you’re an artist.
3. I don’t know what your problem is, but I’ll bet it’s hard to pronounce.
4. Any connection between your reality and mine is purely coincidental.
5. I have plenty of talent and vision. I just don’t care.
6. I like you. You remind me of when I was young and stupid.
7. What am I? Flypaper for freaks!?
8. I’m not being rude. You’re just insignificant.
9. I’m already visualizing the duct tape over your mouth.
10. I will always cherish the initial misconceptions I had about you.
11. It’s a thankless job, but I’ve got a lot of Karma to burn off.
12. Yes, I am an agent of Satan, but my duties are largely ceremonial.
13. No, my powers can only be used for good.
14. How about never? Is never good for you?
15. I’m really easy to get along with once you people learn to worship me.
16. You sound reasonable. . . Time to up my medication.
17. I’ll try being nicer if you’ll try being smarter.
18. I’m out of my mind, but feel free to leave a message.
19. I don’t work here. I’m a consultant.
20. Who me? I just wander from room to room.
21. My toys! My toys! I can’t do this job without my toys!
22. It might look like I’m doing nothing, but at the cellular level I’m really quite busy.
23. At least I have a positive attitude about my destructive habits.
24. You are validating my inherent mistrust of strangers.
25. I see you’ve set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
26. Someday, we’ll look back on this, laugh nervously, and change the subject.
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John and Mary were having dinner in a very fine restaurant. Their waitress, taking another order at a table a few paces away noticed that John was ever so slowly, silently sliding down his chair and under the table, while Mary acted quite unconcerned.
Their waitress watched as John slid all the way down his chair and out of sight under the table.
Still, Mary appeared calm and unruffled, apparently unaware that John had disappeared under the table.
After the waitress finished taking the order, she came over to the table and said to the woman, “Pardon me, ma’am, but I think your husband just slid under the table.”
The woman calmly looked up at her and replied firmly, “Oh, no. He did not. In fact, he just walked in the front door.”
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pic of the day: Lamb resting..
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For those trying to figure out how to convert Standard to Metric, here are a few more conversions to consider:
*Ratio of an igloo’s circumference to its diameter:
Eskimo Pi.
*2,000 pounds of Chinese soup:
Won ton.
*Speed of a tortoise breaking the sound barrier:
Mach turtle.
*16.5 feet in the Twilight Zone:
1 Rod Sterling
*Half of a large intestine:
semicolon.
*1 million aches:
1 megahurtz.
*Time between slipping on a peel and smacking the pavement:
a bananosecond.
*2 wharves:
1 paradox.
*2,000 mockingbirds:
two kilomockingbirds.
*Basic unit of laryngitis:
1 hoarsepower
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This is fiction, fantasy and simply made up… but sometimes ya gotta wish…
A young mother paying a visit to the home of friends who were both scientists, made no attempt to restrain her five-year-old son, who was ransacking an adjoining room.
Finally, an extra loud clatter of bottles did prompt her to say: ‘I hope you don’t mind Johnny being in there.’
‘No,’ said the chemist calmly, ‘He’ll be quiet when he gets to the poisons.’
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WARNING! ENTERING THE PUN ZONE!
~ Did you hear about the optometrist who fell into a lens grinder and made a spectacle of himself?
~ A guy walks into a bar with jumper cables. The bartender says, “You can come in, but don’t start anything!”
~ This duck walks into a bar and orders a beer. “Four bucks,” says the bartender. “Put it on my bill.”
~ A dog with his leg wrapped in bandages hobbles into a saloon. He sidles up to the bar and announces: “I’m lookin’ fer the man who shot my paw.”
~ A man walks into a bar with a slab of asphalt under his arm and says: “A beer please, and one for the road.”
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A man goes to the doctor and says, “Doc, I can’t stop singing ‘The green, green grass of home.’”
The doc replies, “That sounds like Tom Jones syndrome.”
“Is it common?”
“It’s not unusual.”
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Little Johnny watched, fascinated, as his mother smoothed cold cream on her face. ”Why do you do that, mommy?” he asked.
”To make myself beautiful,” said his mother, who then began removing the cream with a tissue.
”What’s the matter?” asked Little Johnny. ”Giving up?”
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TODAY IN TRIVIA: GEORGE WESTINGHOUSE
~ Was an American inventor.
~ He invented the first air brake in 1869, revolutionized the railroad industry, making braking a safer venture and thus permitting trains to travel at higher speeds.
~ made many alterations to improve his invention leading to various forms of the automatic brake.
~ over 2,000,000 freight, passenger, mail, baggage and express cars and 89,000 locomotives were equipped with the Westinghouse Quick-Action Automatic Brake in the year 1905
~ air brake system in – A brake operated by compressed air. Definition: Compressed air pushes on a piston in a cylinder. The piston is connected to a brake shoe which can rub on the train wheel, creating friction and stopping the train. Patent: 88,929 (US) on April 13, 1869.
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LIFE LESSON: The basic thing is that everyone wants happiness, no one wants suffering. And happiness mainly comes from our own attitude, rather than from external factors. If your own mental attitude is correct, even if you remain in a hostile atmosphere, you feel happy. – Tenzin Gyatso, 14th Dalai Lama
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QUIP OF THE DAY: It will all come out in the wash. – Henry Festing Jones
THAT’S (ALMOST) ALL FOLKS!
THE LAST WORD: Be sure you put your feet in the right place, then stand firm. – Abraham Lincoln
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