Time does not change us. It just unfolds us. – Max Frisch
FOR TODAY – OCTOBER 10th – MONDAY
283rd day of 2011 with 82 to follow.
Holidays for Today:
*Columbus Day
*Canadian Thanksgiving
*National Angel Food Cake Day
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TODAY IN BIRTHDAYS:
- 1731 Henry Cavendish, Nice, France, British scientist (known for Discovery of hydrogen, Measured the Earth’s density)
- 1813 Giuseppe Verdi, Italian composer (“La donna è mobile” from Rigoletto, “Va, pensiero” (The Chorus of the Hebrew Slaves) from Nabucco, etc.)
- 1900 Helen Hayes, Washington, D.C., U.S., actress (Anastasia, Airport, Herbie Rides Again)
- 1924 James Clavell, Australian/American author (The Great Escape; To Sir, With Love; Shogun)
- 1930 Yves Chauvin, French chemist, honorary research director at the Institut français du pétrole
- 1936 Gerhard Ertl, Stuttgart-Bad Cannstatt, Baden-Württemberg, Germany, German surface chemist, Nobel laureate, known for Surface chemistry
- 1950 Nora Roberts, Silver Spring, Maryland, romance & mystery novelist (a.k.a. J.D. Robb/ “In Death” series)
- 1954 David Lee Roth, Bloomington, Indiana, United States, singer (Van Halen)
- 1959 Bradley Whitford, Madison, Wisconsin, U.S., actor (The West Wing )
- 1960 Eric Martin, Long Island, New York, U.S., American singer (Mr. Big)
- 1961 Jodi Benson, Rockford, Illinois, voice actress (Princess Ariel in The Little Mermaid, Barbie in Toy Story)
- 1964 Quinton Flynn, Cleveland, Ohio, voice actor (Raiden/Metal Gear Solid 2 & 4, Axel/Kingdom Hearts II, Henry/No More Heroes, Robot Chicken, Crash Bandicoot & Grim Adventures of Billy & Mandy, Silver the Hedgehog)
- 1965 Chris Penn, Los Angeles, California, actor (The Wild Life, Reservoir Dogs, Footloose, Rush Hour, True Romance, All the Right Moves and Pale Rider)
- 1965 Rebecca Pidgeon, Cambridge, Massachusetts, actress (Heist, Edmond, Provoked, Charlotte Ryan / The Unit, Jesse Stone: Sea Change)
- 1967 Mike Malinin, Washington, D.C., American drummer (Goo Goo Dolls)
- 1969 Brett Favre, Gulfport, Mississippi, football player (quarterback)
- 1973 Mario López, San Diego, California, actor (Pet Star, Dancing with the Stars 2006, Hannah Montana)
- 1974 Dale Earnhardt Jr, Concord, North Carolina, NASCAR series driver
- 1981 Una Healy, Thurles, County Tipperary, Republic of Ireland, Irish singer (The Saturdays)
- 1981 Michael Oliver, Los Angeles, California, actor (Problem Child movies )
- 1989 Aimee Teegarden, Downey, California, actress (Friday Night Lights, Scream 4, Prom)
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Integrity combined with faithfulness is a powerful force and worthy of great respect. – Real Live Preacher
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HAPPENED THIS DAY IN HISTORY:
- 1575 Battle of Dormans: Roman Catholic forces under Duke Henry of Guise defeat the Protestants, capturing Philippe de Mornay among others.
- 1580 After a three-day siege, the English Army beheads over 600 Irish and Papal soldiers and civilians at Dún an Óir, Ireland.
- 1845 In Annapolis, Maryland, the Naval School (later renamed the United States Naval Academy) opens with 50 midshipmen students and seven professors.
- 1860 The original cornerstone of the University of the South is laid in Sewanee, Tennessee.
- 1911 The KCR East Rail commences service between Kowloon and Canton.
- 1913 U.S. President Woodrow Wilson triggers the explosion of the Gamboa Dike thus ending construction on the Panama Canal.
- 1933 United Airlines Chesterton Crash: A United Airlines Boeing 247 is destroyed by sabotage, the first such proven case in the history of commercial aviation.
- 1957 The Windscale fire in Cumbria, UK becomes the world’s first major nuclear accident.
- 1964 The 1964 Summer Olympics opening ceremony at Tokyo, Japan, with first time of live Olympic telecast program by geostationary communication satellite.
- 1967 The Outer Space Treaty, signed on January 27 by more than sixty nations, enters into force.
- 1970 Fiji becomes independent.
- 1970 In Montreal, Quebec, a national crisis hits Canada when Quebec Vice-Premier and Minister of Labour Pierre Laporte becomes the second statesman kidnapped by members of the FLQ terrorist group.
- 1971 Sold, dismantled and moved to the United States, London Bridge reopens in Lake Havasu City, Arizona.
- 1972 The 1972 Chicago commuter rail crash, killing 48, occurs due to foggy conditions, the accident push for changes in Chicago commuter rail, such as brightly colored ends on the cars.
- 1973 Vice President of the United States Spiro Agnew resigns after being charged with federal income tax evasion.
- 1985 United States Navy F-14 fighter jets intercept an Egyptian plane carrying the Achille Lauro cruise ship hijackers and force it to land at a NATO base in Sigonella, Sicily where they are arrested.
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While closing up a health club one night, I went to check the women’s locker room to make sure it had been properly cleaned. I was about to knock on the door when I heard a woman inside yelling, “Liar! Liar! Why can’t you cooperate once in a while!”
As she stormed past me, I asked her how many other members were still getting changed. “None,” she fumed.
I walked in, wondering who had angered her. Then I spotted the upright scale. The weight bar was still shaking from her hasty departure.
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Realizing that I’d put on a pound or two, I lamented to my husband, “I’m fat.”
Right on cue he said what all good husbands must: “You’re not fat. Just look at the women around you and you’ll see that you are not fat.”
Our high-school age daughter saw through it and said, “Mom, he’s grading you on the curve.”
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ONE-LINERS : You Probably Live in Oregon if…
~ If someone in a Home Depot store offers you assistance and they don’t work there.
~ If you’ve worn shorts, sandals and a parka at the same time.
~ If you’ve had a lengthy telephone conversation with someone who dialed the wrong number.
~ If you measure distance in hours.
~ If you know several people who have hit a deer more than once.
~ If you have switched from ‘heat’ to ‘A/C’ and back again in the same day.
~ If you install security lights on your house and garage, but leave the doors unlocked, you probably live in Oregon…
~ If you design your kid’s Halloween costume to fit over 2 layers of clothes or under a raincoat.
~ If you know all 4 seasons: almost winter, winter, still winter, and road construction.
~ If you feel guilty throwing aluminum cans or paper in the trash.
~ If you know more than 10 ways to order coffee.
~ If you know more people who own boats than air conditioners.
~ If you stand on a deserted corner in the rain waiting for the “Walk” signal.
~ If you think that if it has no snow or has not recently erupted, it is not a real mountain.
~ If you can taste the difference between Starbucks, Seattle ‘s Best, and Dutch Bros, you probably live in Oregon…
~ If you know the difference between Chinook, Coho and Sockeye salmon.
~ If you know how to pronounce Oregon , Umpqua, Yakima and Willamette (if you can pronounce Sequim, Puyallup , Abiqua, Issaquah, you’re FROM Washington and somehow got roped into moving to Oregon!)
~ If you consider swimming an indoor sport.
~ If you know that Boring is a city and not just a feeling.
~ If you can tell the difference between Japanese, Chinese and Thai food.
~ If you never go camping without waterproof matches and a poncho.
~ If you have actually used your mountain bike on a mountain.
~ If you think people who use umbrellas are either wimps or tourists.
~ If you buy new sunglasses every year, because you can’t find the old ones after such a long time.
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While assembling furniture for a friend, I asked her five-year-old son to bring me a screwdriver. He said, “Do you want a Daddy screwdriver or a Mommy screwdriver?”
“Which one can you get faster?”
“The Mommy screwdriver.”
“Okay. Bring me a Mommy screwdriver.”
The child came back and handed me a butter knife.
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pic of the day: Sunshine through yellow fall leaves
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An educational psychologist is asked to see a pupil who draws all his pictures with black and brown crayons. He talks to him. Nothing obvious. He gives him projective tests. Nothing shows up.
Finally, in desperation, he gives him some paper and a box of crayons.
“Oh goody,” says the boy, “I get an old box of crayons in school and only the black and brown were left.”
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The teacher asked her class of 8 year olds to use a sentence containing the word ‘fascinate’.
Molly put up her hand and said, “My family went to my granddad’s farm, and we all saw his pet sheep It was fascinating.”
The teacher said, “That was good, but I wanted you to use the word “fascinate”, not fascinating”.
Sally raised her hand. She said, “My family went to see Rock City and was fascinated.”
The teacher said, “Well, that was good Sally, but I wanted you to use the word “fascinate.”
Little Johnny raised his hand. The teacher hesitated because she had been burned by Little Johnny before. She finally decided there was no way he could damage the word “fascinate”, so she called on him.
Johnny said, “My aunt Gina has a sweater with ten buttons, but her bosoms are so big she can only fasten eight.”
The teacher sat down and cried.
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WARNING! ENTERING THE PUN ZONE!
~What is the difference between one yard and two yards?
A fence
~I went to the butchers the other day and I bet him $50 that he couldn’t reach the meat off the top shelf. He said, ‘no, the steaks are too high.’
~Which president was least guilty?
Lincoln. He is in a cent.
~Have you heard about the lawyers word processor?
No matter what font you select, everything comes out in fine print.
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MY SON PAUL, a lieutenant, is an aviation instructor at Naval Air Station North Island, San Diego. At Paul’s annual physical, the doctor was studying his chart and noticed his birth date. “What a coincidence,” he said. “I was born the same day.”
Paul thought to himself, ‘Here’s a guy the same age as me, and he’s already a doctor.’
The physician continued reading my son’s chart and then exclaimed, “Wow, that’s fantastic. You’re only 28, and you’re teaching guys how to fly!”
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A police officer in a small town stopped a motorist who was speeding down Main Street.
“But officer,” the man began, “I can explain.”
“Quiet!” snapped the officer. “I’m going to let you spend the night in jail until the chief gets back.”
“But, officer, I just wanted to say,”
“And I said be quiet! You’re going to jail!”
A few hours later the officer looked in on his prisoner and said, “Lucky for you, the chief’s at his daughter’s wedding. He’ll be in a good mood when he gets back.”
“Don’t count on it,” answered the guy in the cell. “I’m the groom.”
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LIFE LESSON: Small opportunities are often the beginning of great enterprises. – Demosthenes
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QUIP OF THE DAY: The great thing about getting older is that you don’t lose all the other ages you’ve been. – Madeleine L’Engle
THAT’S (ALMOST) ALL FOLKS!
THE LAST WORD: Everything that irritates us about others can lead us to an understanding of ourselves. – Carl Jung
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