He that returns good for evil obtains the victory. – Thomas Fuller
FOR TODAY – NOVEMBER 2nd – WEDNESDAY
306thday of 2011 with 59 to follow.
Holidays for Today:
*All Soul’s Day
*Look for Circles Day
*Deviled Egg Day
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TODAY IN BIRTHDAYS:
- 1734 Daniel Boone, Oley Valley, Pennsylvania, frontiersman /explorer (US Hall of Fame-1915)
- 1755 Marie-Antoinette, Queen of France
- 1795 James Knox Polk, Pineville, North Carolina, 11th President of the United States (D) (1845-1849)
- 1799 John Light Atlee, Lancaster County, Pennsylvania, physician and surgeon (one of organizers of the American Medical Association)
- 1815 George Boole, English mathematician (Boolean algebra)
- 1865 Warren Gamaliel Harding, Blooming Grove, Ohio, 29th President of the United States (R) (1921-23)
- 1885 Harlow Shapley, Nashville, Missouri, astronomer (studied the galaxies, helped found National Science Foundation)
- 1894 Alexander Lippisch, German scientist (contributions to the understanding of flying wings, delta wings and the ground effect)
- 1929 Richard E. Taylor, Medicine Hat, Alberta, physicist (Nobel /deep inelastic scattering of electrons on protons and bound neutrons, which have been of essential importance for the development of the quark model in particle physics)
- 1913 Burt Lancaster, New York City, New York, actor (From Here to Eternity, Elmer Gantry, Birdman of Alcatraz)
- 1942 Stefanie Powers, Hollywood, California, actress (Girl From UNCLE, Hart to Hart, McLintock!)
- 1944 Jeffrey A Hoffman, Brooklyn, New York, PhD/astronaut (STS-51-D, STS-35, STS-46, STS-61, STS-75)
- 1957 Carter Beauford, Charlottesville, Virginia, drummer (Dave Matthews Band)
- 1963 Bobby Dall, Mechanicsburg, Pennsylvania, musician Poison (band)
- 1966 David Schwimmer, Astoria, Queens, New York, actor (Friends, Band of Brothers )
- 1990 Kendall Schmidt, Andover, Kansas, singer and actor (Nickelodeon show, Big Time Rush )
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You may delay, but time will not. – Benjamin Franklin
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HAPPENED THIS DAY IN HISTORY:
- 1783 In Rocky Hill, New Jersey, US General George Washington gives his “Farewell Address to the Army”.
- 1861 American Civil War: Western Department Union General John C. Fremont is relieved of command and replaced by David Hunter.
- 1889 North Dakota becomes 39th & South Dakota becomes the 40th state.
- 1895 The first gasoline-powered race in the United States. First prize: $2,000
- 1920 In the United States, KDKA of Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania starts broadcasting as the first commercial radio station. The first broadcast is the result of the U.S. presidential election, 1920.
- 1936 First high-definition TV broadcast service, by BBC in London.
1947 In California, designer Howard Hughes performs the maiden (and only) flight of the Spruce Goose; the largest fixed-wing aircraft ever built. - 1948 Truman beats Dewey, confounding pollsters & newspapers.
- 1957 The Levelland UFO Case in Levelland, Texas, generates national publicity, and remains one of the most impressive UFO cases in American history.
- 1959 “Twenty-One” game show contestant Charles Van Doren admits to a Congressional committee that he had been given questions and answers in advance.
- 1960 Penguin Books is found not guilty of obscenity in the Lady Chatterley’s Lover case
- 1963 South Vietnamese President Ngô Ðình Diệm is assassinated following a military coup.
- 1964 King Saud of Saudi Arabia is deposed by a family coup, and replaced by his half-brother King Faisal.
- 1966 The Cuban Adjustment Act enters force, allowing 123,000 Cubans the opportunity to apply for permanent residence in the United States.
- 1983 U.S. President Ronald Reagan signs a bill creating Martin Luther King, Jr. Day.
- 1984 Capital punishment: Velma Barfield becomes the first woman executed in the United States since 1962.
- 1988 The Morris worm, the first internet-distributed computer worm to gain significant mainstream media attention, is launched from MIT.
- 2000 The first crew arrived at the International Space Station
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Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn’t seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy takes out his phone and calls the emergency services.
He gasps: “My friend is dead! What can I do?”
The operator says: “Calm down, I can help. First, let’s make sure he’s dead.”
There is a silence, then a gunshot is heard. Back on the phone, the guy says: “OK, now what?”
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Ten common fishing expressions explained
1) Catch and Release: This is a conservation term that happens right before the local Fish and Game Protection Officer stops your boat when you have caught over the limit.
2) Hook: (i) A small curved piece of metal used to catch fish. (ii) A clever advertisement to entice a fisherman to spend his live savings on a new rod and reel. (iii) The punch administered by said fisherman’s wife after he spends their life savings [see also, right hook, left hook].
3) Line: Something you give your colleagues when they ask on Monday how your fishing went over the weekend.
4) Lure: An object that is semi-enticing to fish, but will drive an angler into such a frenzy that he will charge his credit card to the limit before exiting the tackle shop.
5) Reel: A weighty object that causes a rod to sink quickly when dropped overboard.
6) Rod: An attractively painted length of fibreglass that keeps an angler from ever getting too close to a fish.
7) School: A grouping in which fish are taught to avoid your £15.99 [$USD30] lures and hold out for bread instead.
Tackle: What your last catch did to you as you reeled him in, but just before he wrestled free and jumped back overboard.
9) Tackle Box: A box shaped amazingly like your comprehensive first aid kit. Only a tackle box contains many sharp objects, so that when you reach in the wrong box blindly to get an elastoplasts [band aid], you soon find that you need more than one.
10) Test: (i) The amount of strength a fishing line affords an angler when fighting fish in a specific weight range. (ii) A measure of your creativity in blaming ‘that flippin’ line’ for once again losing the fish.
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ONE-LINERS : Your Starship Captain Might Be a Redneck If…
Your shuttlecraft has been up on blocks for over a month.
He paints flames and a NRA sticker on the warp nacelles.
You have a shuttle called “Billy Joe Bob”.
He refers to Klingons as “Critters”.
He refers to Photon Torpedoes as “Popguns”.
He has the sensor array repaired with a bent coathanger and aluminum foil.
He installs a set of bullhorns on the front of the saucer section.
He says “Got your ears on, good buddy” instead of “open hailing frequencies”.
He hangs fuzzy dice over the viewscreen.
He rewires his communicator into his belt buckle.
He keeps a six-pack under his command chair and a gun rack above it.
He says “Yee-Ha!” instead of “Engage”.
He has a hand-tooled holster for his phaser.
He insists on calling his executive officer “Bubba”.
He sets the fore viewscreen to reruns of “Bassmaster”.
He programs the food replicator for beer, ribs, and turnip greens.
He paints the starship John Deere green.
He refers to a Pulsar as a “Blue Light Special”.
He refers to the Mutara Nebula as a “swamp”.
His moonshine is stronger than Romulan Ale.
He sings “Lucille” instead of “Kathleen”.
His idea of dress uniform is CLEAN bib overalls.
He wears mirrored shades on the Bridge.
His idea of a “gas giant” is that big ol’ XO Bubba after a meal of beans and weenies.
He sets phaser to “Cajun”
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Answers to the husband’s question, “What’s wrong?”
If the wife says, “Same old, same old.”
Then the wife means: Nothing.
If the wife says: “Nothing.”
Then the wife means: Everything.
If the wife says: “Nothing, really.”
Then the wife means: It’s just that you’re an idiot.
If the wife says: “I don’t want to talk about it.”
Then the wife means: I’m still building up steam.
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pic of the day: Llama Looking
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A Bostoner is visiting Austin, admiring a large bronze statue. One of the locals approaches and says, “This here’s a Texas Ranger.”
The Bostoner says, “We have a statue like this in my hometown, a statue of Paul Revere.”
The Texan thinks about this for a long moment. “Is that that guy who had’ta get help?”
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When my son graduated from high school, he had to give a speech. He began by reading from his prepared text. “I want to talk about my mother and the wonderful influence she has had on my life,” he told the audience. “She is a shining example of parenthood, and I love her more than words could ever do justice.”
At this point he seemed to struggle for words. After a pause he looked up with a grin and said, “It’s really hard to read my mom’s handwriting.”
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WARNING! ENTERING THE PUN ZONE!
Why did the traffic light turn red?
Because it saw the other one changing!
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Why couldn’t the woman buy a bakery shop?
She couldn’t raise enough dough.
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A frog named Kermit Jagger goes to a bank to get a loan. He talks to a teller named Patty Mack. Patty asks the frog what he has for collateral.
The frog pulls out a small figurine, but Patty says, “I’m sorry, that’s just a cheap knick knack.”
The bank manager had been walking by at the time and overheard the conversation.
Looking over, he said, “This figurine is three hundred years old — it’s priceless.
That’s no knick knack, Patty Mack, give that frog a loan. His old man’s a Rolling Stone.”
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Doctor: “I’ve got bad news for you. You are terminally ill.”
Patient: “Is there anything I can do?”
Doctor: “No, nothing.”
Patient: “There has to be something…”
Doctor: “No, nothing.”
Patient: “Nothing at all?”
Doctor: “Well, you can start taking mud baths.”
Patient: “Does that help?”
Doctor: “Not really, but your body will start to get used to being in the earth.”
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On a U.S. cruiser the officer of the deck asked the starboard lookout, “What would you do if a sailor was washed overboard?”
“I’d yell ‘Man overboard,’” answered the lookout snappily.
“Good,” said the officer. “Now what would you do if an officer fell overboard?”
The lookout asked, “Which one, sir?”
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TODAY IN TRIVIA: DEVILED EGGS
~Deviled eggs begin with Ancient Rome.
~The word “deviled” first appeared in print in 1786 and was used to describe highly seasoned fried or boiled dishes.
~The word evolved and was often used as a culinary term to describe fiery hot spiced dishes or condiments in 1800’s. The use of the word was presumably adopted due to the symbolism of the devil and the excessive heat. In modern language, however, the word deviled has a broader meaning and is typically defined as a food that is dark, rich, chocolate, spicily piquant and contains heavy seasoning.
~Deviled eggs or are also known as eggs mimosa and are hard-boiled eggs cut in half and filled with the hard-boiled egg’s yolk mixed usually with mayonnaise and mustard.
~Deviled eggs are usually served cold as a side dish, appetizer or a main course, and are a common holiday or party food.
~In some parts of the Southern and Midwestern United States, the terms “salad eggs” or “dressed eggs” are used, particularly when the dish is served in connection with a church function – to avoid dignifying the word “deviled”.
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LIFE LESSON: When we feel love and kindness toward others, it not only makes others feel loved and cared for, but it helps us also to develop inner happiness and peace. – Tenzin Gyatso, 14th Dalai Lama
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QUIP OF THE DAY: Conceal a flaw, and the world will imagine the worst. – Martial
THAT’S (ALMOST) ALL FOLKS!
THE LAST WORD: It is a mistake to suppose that men succeed through success; they much oftener succeed through failures. Precept, study, advice, and example could never have taught them so well as failure has done. – Samuel Smiles
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