The greatest of faults, I should say, is to be conscious of none. – Thomas Carlyle
FOR TODAY – JANUARY 22nd – FRIDAY
22nd day of 2010 with 343 to follow.
Holidays for Today:
* Answer Your Cat’s Question Day
* National Blonde Brownie Day
* St. Vincent’s Day
* Women’s Healthy Weight Day
* Ukrainian Day (Commemorates the proclamation of the free Ukrainian Republic in 1918)
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TODAY IN BIRTHDAYS:
1561 Sir Francis Bacon, England, statesman/essayist (Novum Organum)
1788 Lord [George Gordon Noel] Byron, England, romantic poet (She Walks In Beauty, Don Juan)
1831 Jack Slade, Carlyle IL, frontiersman (stagecoach/ Pony Express supt., instrumental in opening American West, archetype of Western gunslinger)
1906 Robert E[rvin] Howard, Peaster TX, sci-fi author (Conan the Conqueror; ‘father of sword & sorcery genre’)
1934 Bill Bixby, San Francisco CA, actor (Incredible Hulk, My Favorite Martian)
1934 Graham Kerr, British-born chef (Galloping Gourmet)
1936 Alan J. Heeger, Sioux City Iowa, chemist (co-Nobel for discovery and development of conductive polymers)
1937 Joseph Wambaugh, E. Pittsburgh PA, crime author (The Blue Knight, The Black Marble, The Onion Field)
1952 Teddy Gentry, Fort Payne AL, country music star (Alabama-Mountain Music, Take Me Down)
1955 Thomas David Jones, Baltimore MD, NASA astronaut (Missions STS-59, STS-68, STS-80, STS-98; Sky Walking: An Astronaut’s Memoir)
1970 Alex Ross, Portland OR, comic book painter (Astro City, Marvels, Kingdom Come)
1972 Romi Park, Japanese seiyu (voice actress) [Oh My Goddess, Edward Elric in Fullmetal Alchemist]
1981 Beverley Mitchell, Arcadia CA, actress (Reverend Lucy Camden-Kinkirk – 7th Heaven)~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*
Only put off until tomorrow what you are willing to die having left undone. – Pablo PIcasso
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HAPPENED THIS DAY IN HISTORY:
1890United Mine Workers of America is founded in Columbus, Ohio.
1927 First live radio commentary of a football match anywhere in the world, between Arsenal F.C. and Sheffield United at Highbury.
1946 US President sets up Central Intelligence Group, forerunner of Central Intelligence Agency.
1959 Knox Mine Disaster: Water breaches the River Slope Mine near Pittston City, Pennsylvania in Port Griffith; 12 miners are killed.
1968 Apollo 5 launched to Moon from Cape Canaveral on an unmanned mission around Earth to test the lunar module.
1973 Roe vs Wade – US Supreme Court legalizes abortions during the first six months of pregnancy.
1984 Apple Macintosh, first consumer computer to popularize the mouse & graphical user interface, introduced during Super Bowl XVIII with its famous “1984″ television commercial.
1990 Robert Tappan Morris, Jr. is convicted of releasing the 1988 Internet Computer worm.
1992 Dr. Roberta Bondar becomes the first Canadian woman in space on Space Shuttle: STS-42 Mission..
2002 Kmart Corp becomes the largest retailer in American history to file for Chapter 11 bankruptcy protection.
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rabbi and a minister were discussing their religions. The rabbi said, “You people have been taking things from us for thousands of years; The Ten Commandments, for instance.”
“Well, it’s true that we took the Ten Commandments from you, but you can’t actually say that we’ve kept them!”
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One semester when my brother, Peter, attended the University of Minnesota in Minneapolis, an art-student friend of his asked if he could paint Peter’s portrait for a class assignment. Peter agreed, and the art student painted and submitted the portrait, only to receive a C minus.
The art student approached the professor to ask why the grade was so poor. The teacher told him that the proportions in the painting were incorrect.
“The head is too big,” the professor explained. “The shoulders are too wide, and the feet are enormous.”
The next day, the art student brought Peter to see the professor. He took one look at my brother and said, “Okay, A minus.”
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ONE-LINERS : SOME of LIFE’S LITTLE INSTRUCTIONS
~ Sing in the shower.
~ Never refuse homemade brownies.
~ Return borrowed vehicles with the gas tank full.
~ Compliment three people every day.
~ Floss your teeth.
~ Overtip the waitress. Most of them work harder than you ever will.
~ Use the good silver.
~ Sing in a choir.
~ Don’t expect life to be fair.
~ Count your blessings.
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A psychology student was to help a professor in conducting a personality test. The room was set up with various props in order to move through the assessment quickly. The first person to enter the room started through the test.
“How does this glass of water look to you?”
Person 1: It is half empty.
Student writes ‘pessimist’ in his report.
Person 2 enters the room. “How does this glass of water look to you?”
Person 2: It is half full.
Student writes ‘optimist’ in his report.
Person 3 enters the room. “How does this glass of water look to you?”
Person 3: Looks like you have twice as much glass as you need there.
The student looks totally blank and goes to consult with the professor.
“Oh them!”, the professor says, “I forgot to warn you about the engineers! They have no personality.”
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pic of the day: Farm collie walking in the woods. . .
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The Day I started my construction job, I was in the office filling out an employee form when I came to:
Single__, Married__, Divorced___ .
I marked single. Glancing the man next to me who was also filling out the form, I noticed he hadn’t marked any of the blanks.
Instead he’d written, “Yes, in that order.”
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Every year on their wedding anniversary my boss, Woody, and his wife celebrated by staying at the same resort hotel. On their 25th anniversary they booked their usual room. But when the hotel’s bell captain escorted them upstairs, they were in for a big surprise. “There must be some mistake,” Woody said. “This looks like the bridal suite.”
“It’s okay,” the bell captain reassured him. “If I put you in the ballroom, that doesn’t mean you have to dance.”
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WARNING! ENTERING THE PUN ZONE!
In George Washington’s days, there were no cameras. One’s image was either sculpted or painted. Some paintings of George Washington showed him standing behind a desk with one arm behind his back while others showed both legs and both arms.
Prices charged by painters were not based on how many people were to be painted, but by how many limbs were to be painted. Arms and legs are “limbs,” therefore painting them would cost the buyer more.
Hence the expression, “Okay, but it’ll cost you an arm and a leg.”
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If College Students Wrote the Bible. . .
* The Last Supper would have been eaten the next morning – cold.
* The Ten Commandments would actually be only five; double spaced and written in large font.
* A new edition would be published every two years in order to limit reselling.
* Forbidden fruit would have been eaten because it wasn’t cafeteria food.
* Paul’s letter to the Romans would become Paul’s E-mail to abuse@romans.gov.
* Reason Cain killed Abel; they were roommates.
* Reason why Moses and followers walked the desert for 40 years; they didn’t want to ask directions and look like freshmen.
* Instead of God creating the world in six days and resting on the seventh, he would have put it off until the night before it was due and then pulled an all-nighter.
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There was a man who worked for the Post Office whose job was to process all the mail that had illegible addresses.
One day, a letter came addressed in a shaky handwriting to God with no actual address. He thought he should open it to see what it was about.
The letter read:
Dear God,
I am an 83 year old widow, living on a very small pension.
Yesterday someone stole my purse. It had $100 in it, which was all the money I had until my next pension payment.
Next Sunday is Christmas, and I had invited two of my friends over for dinner. Without that money, I have nothing to buy food with, have no family to turn to, and you are my only hope. Can you please help me?
Sincerely, Edna
The postal worker was touched. He showed the letter to all the other workers. Each one dug into his or her wallet and came up with a few dollars.
By the time he made the rounds, he had collected $96, which they put into an envelope and sent to the woman..
The rest of the day, all the workers felt a warm glow thinking of Edna and the dinner she would be able to share with her friends.
Christmas came and went.
A few days later, another letter came from the same old lady to God.
All the workers gathered around while the letter was opened.
It read:
Dear God,
How can I ever thank you enough for what you did for me?
Because of your gift of love, I was able to fix a glorious dinner for my friends. We had a very nice day and I told my friends of your wonderful gift.
By the way, there was $4 missing.
I think it might have been those idiots down at the post office.
Sincerely, Edna
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TODAY IN TRIVIA: St. Vincent’s Day
Old English proverb. . .
Remember on St. Vincent’s Day,
If that the Sun his beams display,
Be sure to mark the transient beam
Which through the casement sheds a gleam;
For ’tis a token bright and clear
Of prosperous weather all the year.
St. Vincent’s Day is heralded for its weather lore. A sunny day signifies “more wine than water” and means that the sap might begin to rise. Frost on that day presages a delayed crop. May today bring sunbeams bright and clear, if the prosperity only follows!
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LIFE LESSON: The less you can live on, the more chance your idea will succeed. This is true even after you’ve ‘made it’. – Hugh Macleod
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My wife thinks I’m too nosy. Well, at least that’s what she keeps scribbling in her diary.
THAT’S (ALMOST) ALL FOLKS!
THE LAST WORD: As we grow old…the beauty steals inward. – Ralph Waldo Emerson
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