Those who face that which is actually before them, unburdened by the past, undistracted by the future, these are they who live, who make the best use of their lives; these are those who have found the secret of contentment. – Alban Goodier
FOR TODAY – MARCH 25th – THURSDAY
84th day of 2010 with 281 to follow.
Holidays for Today:
* Feast of the Annunciation
* Greece Independence Day
* Maryland Day (settlers from The Ark and The Dove first stepped foot onto Maryland soil)
* Pecan Day
* Waffle Day
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TODAY IN BIRTHDAYS:
1867 Gutzon Borglum, St. Charles Idaho, sculptor (Mount Rushmore)
1914 Norman E Borlaug, Cresco IA, US agriculture scientist (Nobel 1970; Father of the “Green Revolution)
1918 Howard Cosell, Winston-Salem NC, sports reporter
1920 Patrick Troughton, British actor (2nd Doctor Who, The Omen)
1925 Flannery O’Connor, Savannah GA, novelist (A Good Man Is Hard to Find)
1928 James A Lovell Jr, Cleveland OH, USN/astronaut (Gemini 7, 12, Apollo 8, 13)
1934 Gloria Steinem, Toledo OH, feminist/publisher (Ms Magazine)
1940 Anita Bryant, Barnsdall OK, singer/ activist (Paper Roses)
1942 Aretha Franklin, Memphis TN, Soul Sister #1/singer (Respect)
1946 Stephen Hunter, Kansas City MO, author / film critic (Point of Impact, Time to Hunt, Black Light)
1947 Elton John, England, singer/songwriter (Rocketman, Your Song, Goodbye Yellow Brick Road)
1964 Kate DiCamillo, Philadelphia PA, children’s author (The Tale of Despereaux, Because of Winn-Dixie, Mercy Watson)
1965 Sarah Jessica Parker, Nelsonville OH, actress (Square Pegs, LA Story, Failure to Launch)
1982 Danica Patrick, Beloit WI, race car driver (Indy Car series; Go Daddy representative)
1990 Kiowa Joseph Gordon, Berlin/grew up IN, actor (Twilight Saga/ Embry Call)
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When your work speaks for itself, don’t interrupt.
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HAPPENED THIS DAY IN HISTORY:
1306 Robert the Bruce becomes King of Scotland.
1634 First settlers arrive in Maryland.
1821 Greece gains independence from Turkey (National Day).
1911 In New York City the Triangle Shirtwaist Factory fire kills 146 garment workers.
1931 Scottsboro Boys (accused of raping a white woman) arrested in Alabama.
1954 RCA manufactures 1st color TV set (12½” screen at $1,000).
1961 Sputnik 10 carries a dog, Zvezdochka (Little Star), and a dummy cosmonaut a wooden mannequin on a one orbit mission.
1965 Civil rights activists led by Martin Luther King, Jr. successfully complete their 4-day 50-mile march from Selma to the capitol in Montgomery.
1979 First fully functional space shuttle orbiter, Columbia, delivered to the John F. Kennedy Space Center to be prepared for its first launch.
2006 Capitol Hill massacre: A gunman killed six people before taking his own life at a party in Seattle’s Capitol Hill neighborhood.
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A senior at Louisiana was overheard saying … “When the end of the world comes, I hope to be in Louisiana .”
When asked why, he replied, “I’d rather be in Louisiana because everything happens in Louisiana 20 years later than in the rest of the civilized world.”
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Seems an elderly gentleman had serious hearing problems for a number of years. He went to the doctor and the doctor was able to have him fitted for a set of hearing aids that allowed the gentleman to hear 100%.
The elderly gentleman went back to the doctor for a test a month later. The doctor said, “Your hearing is perfect. Your family must be really pleased you can hear again.”
To which the gentleman said, “Oh, I haven’t told my family yet. I just sit around and listen to the conversations. I’ve changed my will three times!”
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ONE-LINERS : Groucho Marx Humor
~ I would never belong to a club that would have me as a member.
~ Women should be obscene and not heard.
~ I never forget a face, but in your case, I’ll be glad to make an exception.
~ I’ve had a perfectly wonderful evening. But this wasn’t it.
~ Don’t look now, but there’s one too many in this room and I think it’s you.
~ He may look like an idiot and talk like an idiot, but don’t let that fool you. He really is an idiot.
~ Room service? Send up a larger room.
~ I find television very educating. Every time somebody turns on the set, I go into the other room and read a book.
~ Now there’s a man with an open mindyou can feel the breeze from here.
~ I didn’t like the play, but then I saw it under adverse conditionsthe curtain was up.
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HELPING REFUGEES IN KUWAIT during Operating Desert Storm, my unit had to breathe smoke-filled air. To ease our concerns, our commander told us that the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services had tested the air. “No adverse effects will be experienced by service members serving in the area,” our commander quoted, “as long as prolonged breathing is avoided.” – 1st Lt. Robert Harris
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pic of the day: Female Cardinal
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Sitting in a hospital waiting room, I watched a woman and her son. They were working a crossword puzzle together.
“Mom?” the boy asked, pointing to the puzzle. “What fits here?”
“It’s man’s best friend,” Mom hinted, helpfully.
The boy thought a moment, then guessed, “Duct tape?”
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ONE COLD, WINDY February morning during my Army basic training at Fort Bliss, Texas, our company was assembled outside. There, at parade rest, we were forced to listen to an endless procession of individuals extolling the benefits of Army life.
The last person to speak droned on about the insurance program. When the ordeal was nearly over, he asked if there were any questions. From the rear of the formation, a shivering voice inquired, “Will the insurance cover frostbite?” – Michael Gorfain
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WARNING! ENTERING THE PUN ZONE!
~ How do you unlock a haunted house?
With a skeleton key
~ Why was Cinderella thrown off the team?
Because she ran away from the ball
~ What flies but has no wings?
Time
~ What’s the difference between a guard working the graveyard shift and a butcher?
One stays awake and the other weighs a steak.
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Bubba and Jake chartered a plane with a pilot to drop them off in the wilds of Alaska for a week of elk hunting, just the same as they did the year before.
When the pilot returned with the plane Bubba exclaimed joyfully to the pilot, “We had a great hunting trip! We bagged four elk!”
The pilot regretfully explained, “Unfortunately, our plane can only fly with the weight of two elk. You’ll have to leave the other two behind.”
Bubba and Jake were both infuriated and insistent. “We won’t allow you to fly this plane out without all four elk,” Jake demanded.
The eager to please pilot relented and the plane took off with the three of them and their four elk. About fifteen minutes into the flight the engine started to sputter, and within seconds they were hurtling to the ground.
Wearily arising from the wreckage, Bubba looked at Jake and wheezed, “Do you have any idea where we are?”
Jake, quite pleased with himself, replied, “Yes! We’re about a mile from where we crashed last year.”
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Two women were comparing notes on the difficulties of running a small business.
“I started a new practice last year,” the first one said. “I insist that each of my employees take at least a week off every three months.”
“Why in the world would you do that?” the other asked.
She responded, “It’s the best way I know of to learn which ones I can do without.”
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TODAY IN TRIVIA: Maryland Day is observed on the anniversary of the March 25, 1634, landing of settlers in the Province of Maryland. On this day settlers from The Ark and The Dove first stepped foot onto Maryland soil, at St. Clement’s Island in the Potomac River. The colony was granted to Cæcilius Calvert, 2nd Baron Baltimore two years prior by Charles I of England. In thanksgiving for the safe landing, Jesuit Father Andrew White celebrated mass for the colonists, perhaps for the first time ever in this part of the world. The landing coincided with the Feast of the Annunciation, a holy day honoring Mary, and the start of the new year in England’s legal calendar (prior to 1752).
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LIFE LESSON: “Now is the only time there is. Make your now wow, your minutes miracles, and your days pay. Your life will have been magnificently lived and invested, and when you die you will have made a difference.” Mark Victor Hansen
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Nothing is ever really lost. It’s just where it doesn’t belong.
THAT’S (ALMOST) ALL FOLKS!
THE LAST WORD: “ ‘Now’ is the operative word. Everything you put in your way is just a method of putting off the hour when you could actually be doing your dream. You don’t need endless time and perfect conditions. Do it now. Do it today. Do it for 20 minutes and watch your heart start beating.” Sam Ewing
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