May 22, 2014

Everything you’ve ever wanted is on the other side of fear. ­- George Addair

TODAY – MAY 22nd – THURSDAY

142nd day of 2014 with 223 to follow.

Holidays for Today:

*National Maritime Day

*Buy a Musical Instrument Day

*National Vanilla Pudding Day

*International Day for Biological Diversity

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BIRTHDAYS ON THIS DATE:

  • 1783 William Sturgeon, Whittington, Lancashire physicist and inventor (invented the first practical English electric motor)
  • 1813 Richard Wagner, German composer (The Flying Dutchman, Ride of the Valkyries, Wedding March from opera Lohengnn)
  • 1844 Mary Cassatt, Allegheny City, Pennsylvania, artist (specialized in images showing mothers and children)
  • 1859 Sir Arthur Conan Doyle, Scottish physician and writer (Sherlock Holmes stories: The Hounds of the Baskervilles, The Speckled Band, The Sign of the Four)
  • 1907 Sir Laurence Olivier, English stage and screen actor (Spartacus, Sleuth, Marathon Man, Khartoum, Clash of the Titans, narrated The World at War)
  • 1912 Herbert C. Brown, London, England, chemist (Nobel / Organoboranes)
  • 1927 George Andrew Olah, Hungary, chemist (research on generation and reactivity of carbocations via superacids)
  • 1936 M. Scott Peck, NYC, New York, psychiatrist and writer (The Road Less Traveled)
  • 1938 Richard Benjamin, New York City, New York, actor (Goodbye, Columbus, Catch-22, Portnoy’s Complaint, Westworld, Quark, Love at First Bite)
  • 1939 Paul Winfield, Los Angeles, California, actor (Sounder, King, Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan)
  • 1938 Frank Converse, St. Louis, Missouri, actor (Coronet Blue, N.Y.P.D.; Movin’ On, Anne of Green Gables)
  • 1942 Barbara Parkins, Canadian actress (Peyton Place, Valley of the Dolls, The Testimony of Two Men, To Catch a King)
  • 1947 Andreas Gerasimos Michalitsianos, Greek-American astronomer and a NASA astrophysicist (worked with Hubble Space Telescope, International Ultraviolet Explorer, symbiotic stars)
  • 1958 Denise Welch, English actress and presenter (Coronation Street, Waterloo Road, Celebrity Big Brother, Dancing on Ice 2011)
  • 1964 Mark Christopher Lawrence, Los Angeles, California, actor (Terminator 2 Judgment Day, Planet of the Apes, Lost Treasure, The Pursuit of Happyness, Chuck)
  • 1967 Brooke Smith, New York, New York, actress (The Silence of the Lambs, Grey’s Anatomy )
  • 1970 Naomi Campbell, British super model and actress (New York Undercover, Unzipped)
  • 1972 Anna Belknap, Damariscotta, Maine, actress (CSI: NY, The Handler, Medical Investigation, Alchemy)
  • 1974 Sean Gunn, St. Louis, Missouri, actor (Gilmore Girls )
  • 1978 Ginnifer Goodwin, Memphis, Tennessee, actress (Big Love, Mona Lisa Smile , Something Borrowed, He’s Just Not That into You, Once Upon a Time)
  • 1982 Apolo Anton Ohno, Seattle, Washington, short track speed skater (2 gold, 2 silver, 4 bronze medals; Dancing with the Stars 4th season champion w/Julianne Hough)

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Your time is limited, so don’t waste it living someone else’s life. – ­Steve Jobs

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HISTORICAL HAPPENINGS:

  • 1816 A mob in Littleport, Cambridgeshire, England, riots over high unemployment and rising grain costs; the rioting spreads to Ely the next day.
  • 1826 HMS Beagle departs on its first voyage.
  • 1840 The transporting of British convicts to the New South Wales colony is abolished.
  • 1843 Thousands of people and their cattle head west via wagon train from Independence, Missouri to what would later become the Oregon Territory. It is part of the Great Migration. They follow what is now known as the Oregon Trail.
  • 1906 The Wright brothers are granted U.S. patent number 821,393 for their Flying-Machine.
  • 1915 Lassen Peak erupts with a powerful force, and is the only mountain other than Mount St. Helens to erupt in the continental US during the 20th century.
  • 1915 Three trains collide in the Quintinshill rail crash near Gretna Green, Scotland, killing 227 people and injuring 246; the accident is found to be the result of non-standard operating practices during a shift change at a busy junction.
  • 1926 Chiang Kai-shek replaces communists in Kuomintang China
  • 1936 Aer Lingus (Aer Loingeas) is founded by the Irish government as the national airline of the Republic of Ireland.
  • 1960 An earthquake measuring 9.5 on the moment magnitude scale, now known as the Great Chilean Earthquake, hits southern Chile. It is the most powerful earthquake ever recorded.
  • 1962 Continental Airlines Flight 11 crashes after bombs explode on board.
  • 1963 Assassination attempt of Greek left-wing politician Gregoris Lambrakis, who will die five days afterwards.
  • 1964 U.S. President Lyndon B. Johnson announces the goals of his Great Society social reforms to bring an “end to poverty and racial injustice” in America.
  • 1967 The L’Innovation department store in the centre of Brussels, Belgium, burns down. It is the most devastating fire in Belgian history, resulting in 323 dead and missing and 150 injured.
  • 1990 Microsoft releases the Windows 3.0 operating system.
  • 2002 In Washington, D.C., the remains of the missing Chandra Levy are found in Rock Creek Park.
  • 2002 American civil rights movement: a jury in Birmingham, Alabama, convicts former Ku Klux Klan member Bobby Frank Cherry of the 1963 murders of four girls in the bombing of the 16th Street Baptist Church.
  • 2003 In Fort Worth, Texas, Annika Sörenstam becomes the first woman to play the PGA Tour in 58 years.
  • 2004 The U.S. town of Hallam, Nebraska, is wiped out by a powerful F4 tornado (part of the May 2004 tornado outbreak sequence) that broke a width record at an astounding 2.5 miles (4.0 km) wide, which kills one resident.
  • 2008 The Late-May 2008 tornado outbreak sequence unleashes 235 tornadoes, including an EF4 and an EF5 tornado, between May 22 and May 31, 2008. The tornadoes strike 19 states and one Canadian province.
  • 2011 An EF5 tornado strikes Joplin, Missouri, killing 162 people and wreaking $2.8 billion worth in damage—the costliest and seventh-deadliest single tornado in U.S. history.

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Little Johnny’s teacher asks, “What is the chemical formula for water?”

Little Johnny replies, “H-I-J-K-L-M-N-O!!”

The teacher, puzzled, asks, “What on Earth are you talking about?”

Little Johnny replies, “Yesterday you said it was H to O!”
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Astronomers were excited this week at having isolated a brief sound which occurred immediately before the Big Bang.

Apparently, that sound was “Uh oh.”

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Ferne Southern said she was staying with her 8-year-old granddaughter, Brooke, while her parents were out of town.

Brooke was delaying bedtime, as usual, so her grandmother told her about counting sheep to fall asleep.

The 8-year-old thought that was a good idea. Everything was quiet for a while. But just as grandmother was dozing off, a voice sounded:

“Nana?”

“Yes?”

“There are 38.”

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ONE-LINERS: UNIQUE BOOK TITLES

“How to Make a Robot” by Anne Droyd

“Where Can I Find a Cure?” by Anita Remedy

“Cry Wolf!” by Al Armist

“Beekeeping” by A.P. Arry

“Parachuting” by Hugo First

“Armed Heists” by Robin Banks

“Off to Market” by Tobias A. Pigg

“Germ Warfare” by Mike Rohbes

“I Was a Cloakroom Attendant” by Mahatma Cloake

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Five year old Becky answered the door when the Census taker came by.

She told the Census taker that her daddy was a doctor and wasn’t home, because he was performing an appendectomy.

“My,” said the census taker, “that sure is a big word for such a little girl. Do you know what it means?”

“Sure! Fifteen hundred bucks, and that doesn’t even include the anesthesiologist!”

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pic of the day: Bourbon Red Turkey Pair

pair of bourbon red turkeys
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WARNING! ENTERING THE PUN ZONE!

~When a teacher closes his eyes, why should it remind him of an empty classroom?
Because there are no pupils to see!

~Why did the teacher put the lights on?
Because the class was so dim!

~How did Vikings communicate?
By norse code!
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A salesman, tired of his job, gave it up to become a policeman.

Several months later, a friend asked him how he liked his new role.

“Well,” he replied, “the pay is good and the hours aren’t bad, but what I like best is that the customer is always wrong.”

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Q: How many successful parachute jumps must a paratrooper make before he graduates?
A: All of them.
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A group of young children were sitting in a circle with their teacher. She was going around in turn asking them all questions.

“Davey, what sound does a cow make?”
Davey replied, “It goes ‘moo’.”

“Alice, what sound does a cat make?”
Alice said, “It goes ‘meow’.”

“Jamie, what sound does a lamb make?”
Jamie said, “It goes ‘baaa’.”

“Jennifer, what sound does a mouse make?”
Jennifer paused, and said, “Uhh… it goes… ‘click’!”

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A lawyer had a jury trial in a very difficult business case. The client, who had attended the trial, was out of town when the jury came back with its decision, which was for the lawyer and his client.

The lawyer immediately sent a telegram to his client, reading, “Justice has triumphed!”

The client wired back, “Appeal at once!”

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TODAY IN TRIVIA: Whatever it is!

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QUIP OF THE DAY: I could dance with you till the cows come home, on second thought I’ll dance with the cows till you come home. – Groucho Marx

THAT’S (ALMOST) ALL FOLKS!

Thought for the day. . .
Let your life mean something. Become an inspiration to others so that they may try to do more and to become more than they are today. – Thomas D. Willhite

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