Jokes and Trivia for September 3, 2012

 

Everybody needs beauty as well as bread, places to play in and pray in, where nature may heal and give strength to body and soul alike. – John Muir

TODAY – SEPTEMBER 3rd – MONDAY

247th day of 2012 with 119 to follow.

Holidays for Today:

*Labor Day (First Monday of month)

*Skyscraper Day

*National Welsh Rarebit Day

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BIRTHDAYS ON THIS DATE:

  • 1783 Anna Russell, Duchess of Bedford, British Creator of Afternoon Tea
  • 1869 Fritz Pregl, Austrian chemist (Nobel / quantitative microelemental analysis)
  • 1899 Frank Macfarlane Burnet, Traralgon, Victoria, Australian biologist (contributions to immunology)
  • 1905 Carl David Anderson, New York City, New York,  physicist (discovered the positron)
  • 1908 Lev Semenovich Pontryagin, Russian  mathematician (despite his blindness, became one of the greatest mathematicians of the 20th century)
  • 1913 Alan Ladd, Hot Springs, Arkansas, actor (This Gun for Hire, The Blue Dahlia, O.S.S., Whispering Smith, The Great Gatsby, Shane)
  • 1923 Glen Bell, Lynwood, California, businessman (founded Taco Bell)
  • 1923 Mort Walker, El Dorado, Kansas, comic artist (Beetle Bailey, Hi and Lois)
  • 1942 Al Jardine, Lima, Ohio, guitarist (The Beach Boys)
  • 1943 Valerie Perrine, Galveston, Texas, actress (Lenny, Miss Teschmacher in Superman, The Border)
  • 1957 Steve Schirripa, Brooklyn, New York, actor (The Sopranos, The Secret Life of an American Teenager, Open Season)
  • 1973 Jennifer Paige, Marietta, Georgia, American singer-songwriter (Crush)
  • 1976 Ashley Jones, Memphis, Tennessee, actress (The Young and the Restless, True Blood)
  • 1978 Nick Wechsler, Albuquerque, New Mexico, actor (Revenge )
  • 1982 Andrew McMahon, Concord, Massachusetts, singer and songwriter (for bands Something Corporate and Jack’s Mannequin)
  • 1983 Christine Woods, Lake Forest, Orange County, California,  actress (FlashForward )
  • 1984 Garrett Hedlund, Roseau, Minnesota,  actor (Friday Night Lights, Four Brothers, Eragon )

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When we are no longer able to change a situation, we are challenged to change ourselves – Viktor Frankl.

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HISTORICAL HAPPENINGS:

  • 301 San Marino, one of the smallest nations in the world and the world’s oldest republic still in existence, is founded by Saint Marinus.
  • 1783 American Revolutionary War ends with the signing of the Treaty of Paris by the United States and the Kingdom of Great Britain.
  • 1798 The week long battle of St. George’s Caye begins between Spain and Britain off the coast of Belize.
  • 1802 William Wordsworth composes the sonnet Composed upon Westminster Bridge, September 3, 1802.
  • 1875 The first official game of Polo is played in Argentina after being introduced by British Ranchers.
  • 1941 The Holocaust: Karl Fritzsch, deputy camp commandant of the Auschwitz concentration camp, experiments with the use of Zyklon B in the gassing of Soviet POWs.
  • 1950 “Nino” Farina becomes the first Formula One Drivers’ champion after winning the 1950 Italian Grand Prix.
  • 1951 The first long-running American television soap opera, Search for Tomorrow, airs its first episode on the CBS network.
  • 1976 Viking program: The American Viking 2 spacecraft lands at Utopia Planitia on Mars.
  • 1987 In a coup d’état in Burundi, President Jean-Baptiste Bagaza is deposed by Major Pierre Buyoya.
  • 1994 Sino-Soviet Split: Russia and the People’s Republic of China agree to de-target their nuclear weapons against each other.
  • 1997 Vietnam Airlines Flight 815 (Tupolev TU-134) crashes on approach into Phnom Penh airport, killing 64.
  • 1999 An 87-automobile pile-up happens on Highway 401 freeway just East of Windsor, Ontario, Canada after an unusually thick fog from Lake St. Clair.
  • 2004 Beslan school hostage crisis – day 3: the Beslan hostage crisis ends with the deaths of over 300 people, more than half of which are children.

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“My doctor is really nice to me.”

“Oh yeah? How nice is he?”

“Well for starters, he treated me for double pneumonia but he only billed me for one.

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The doctor answered the phone and heard the familiar voice of a colleague on the other end of the line.

“We need a fourth for poker,” said the friend. “Can we count you in?”

“I’ll be right over,” whispered the doctor.

As he was putting on his coat, his wife asked, “Is it serious, dear?”

“Oh yeah, quite serious,” said the doctor gravely. “In fact, there are three other doctors there already!”

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ONE-LINERS:

God grades on the cross, not the curve.

—–

God loves everyone, but probably prefers ‘fruits of the spirit’ over ‘religious nuts!’

—–

God promises a safe landing, not a calm passage.

—–

He who angers you, controls you!

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pic of the day: near Hickory, North Carolina

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WARNING! ENTERING THE PUN ZONE!

A shark was cruising London’s river. Due to the pollution it wasn’t the best of Thames. The shark came across a mollusk who was not feeling well and was about to devour him when the mollusk exclaimed, “Don’t eat me or you, too, will become very ill.”

Feeling a moment of compassion, the shark offered to take him to a nearby emergency reef for treatment. But on the way he
encountered another shark to whom he owed money. Suddenly feeling much less compassionate, he said to the other shark, “Here’s the sick squid I owe you.”

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One Sunday after church I asked my young daughter, “What was the children’s sermon about?”

She answered, “Don’t be scared, you’ll get your quilt.”

Needless to say, I was perplexed. Later in the day, the pastor stopped by for tea. I asked him about the topic of that morning’s children’s sermon.

He said, “Be not afraid, Thy comforter is coming.”   (Pastor Tim Davis)

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A guy gets home from work one night and hears a little voice. The little voice tells him, “Quit your job, sell your house, take your money, go to Vegas.” The man is disturbed at what he hears and ignores the little voice.

The next day, when he gets home from work, the same thing happens. The little voice tells him, “Quit your job, sell your house, take your money, go to Vegas.” Again, the man ignores the little voice, though he is very troubled by the event.

Every day, day after day, the man hears the same little voice when he gets home from work, “Quit your job, sell your house, take your money, go to Vegas.” Each time the man hears the little voice he becomes increasingly upset.

Finally, after several weeks, he succumbs to the pressure. He quits his job, sells his house, takes his money and heads to Vegas.

The man gets off the plane in Vegas and starts thinking “What now?” Almost in response, the little voice tells him, “Harrah’s.” So, he hops in a cab and rushes over to Harrah’s.

As soon as he sets foot in the casino, the little voice tells him, “Roulette.” The man does as he is told. When he gets to the roulette table, the little voice tells him, “Seventeen.”

Nervously, the man exchanges all his money for chips and puts them all on number 17.

The croupier spins the roulette wheel and drops the ball into the groove. Around and around the ball caroms. The man anxiously watches the ball as it slowly loses momentum and finally settles into … number 21.

The little voice says, “Oopsie!”

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TODAY IN TRIVIA: SKYSCRAPER

~ “Skyscraper” originally was a nautical term referring to a small triangular sail set above the skysail on a sailing ship.

~ It was in the late 19th century when it is first applied to buildings of steel frame construction where building highrises began.

~ Supertall skyscraper is defined as a functional and habitable building with height over 300 m, as the number of buildings exceeding such height is considered very low around the world.

~ Burj Khalifa which is the current world tallest completed building stands at a height of 828m, which is almost double of the minimum height for a specific building to be placed into top 10 world tallest buildings’ list. (current 10th place goes to Trump International Hotel and Tower at a height of 423m)

~ Despite Burj Khalifa is the tallest building, Shanghai World Financial Center still holds the record of world tallest observation deck at a height of over 470m at 100th floor. Burj Khalifa just took the title of world tallest OUTDOOR observation deck at a height of 452m at 124th floor.

~ Ten years ago, there are only 4 buildings in the world that measure over 400m. Currently, including the topped out buildings, there is a total of 12 buildings exceeding that height. So, probably ten years later, the number could easily be over 30.

~ Now, the number is even more than double; 54 with mainly new buildings coming up from Asia (China and Dubai particularly). ‘Rise of the East’.

~ There are only 4 cities in the world with more than 5 buildings exceeding 300m (supertall skyscrapers). The cities are Dubai, Hong Kong, Chicago and New York City.

~ Dubai, United Arab Emirates is currently the city with the most supertall skyscrapers with minimum of 10 buildings in the category. The record would be remained for a long time due to rapid construction activities in Dubai.

~ The first building in history that has over 100 floors is Empire State Building, which has a total of 102 floors, built in 1931.

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QUIP OF THE DAY: Old people shouldn’t eat health foods. They need all the preservatives they can get!

THAT’S (ALMOST) ALL FOLKS!

Thought for the day. . .

You gain strength, courage and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face – Eleanor Roosevelt.