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August 23rd

Time is the coin of your life. It is the only coin you have, and only you can determine how it will be spent. Be careful lest you let other people spend it for you. – Carl Sandburg

TODAY – AUGUST 23rd

235th day of the year (236th in leap years) with 130 days to follow.

Holidays for Today:
~ National Spongecake Day
~ Ride the Wind Day
~ International Day for the Remembrance of the Slave Trade and its Abolition
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BIRTHDAYS ON THIS DATE:

  • 1785 Oliver Hazard Perry, South Kingston, Rhode Island, naval hero (Battle of Lake Erie, “We have met the enemy and they are ours…”)
  • 1890 Harry Frank Guggenheim, West End, New Jersey, businessman and publisher (co-founded Newsday)
  • 1917 Tex Williams, Ramsey, Illinois, singer (helped move acoustic country music to dance-oriented mainstream pop Western swing)
  • 1929 Vera Miles, Boise City, Oklahoma, actress (The Searchers, Psycho, The Man Who Shot Liberty Valance, International Airport)
  • 1934 Barbara Eden, Tucson, Arizona, actress & singer (How to Marry a Millionaire, Voyage to the Bottom of the Sea, I Dream of Jeannie, Harper Valley P.T.A.)
  • 1943 Nelson DeMille, NYC, New York, author (The Gold Coast, The General’s Daughter, Plum Island, Radiant Angel)
  • 1949 Shelley Long, Fort Wayne, Indiana, actress (Diane in Cheers, The Money Pit, Brady Bunch Movie, Different Flowers)
  • 1951 Queen Noor of Jordan, Washington, D.C., queen dowager of Jordan (widow of King Hussein; his 4th spouse and queen consort between their marriage in 1978 and his death in 1999)
  • 1970 River Phoenix, Madras, Oregon, actor / singer (Stand by Me, The Mosquito Coast, Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade, My Own Private Idaho)
  • 1976 Scott Caan, Los Angeles, California, actor (Ocean’s Eleven, Twelve & Thirteen; Into the Blue, Enemy of the State, Hawaii Five-O)

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“The world is so full of a number of things, I ’m sure we should all be as happy as kings.” ― Robert Louis Stevenson
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HISTORICAL HAPPENINGS:

  • 1305 William Wallace, Scottish patriot, is executed for high treason by Edward I of England.
  • 1775 King George III declares that the American colonies exist in a state of open and avowed rebellion.
  • 1784 Eastern Tennessee (western NC at the time) declares itself an independent state under the name of Franklin; the step is rejected by Congress.
  • 1939 World War II: Germany and the Soviet Union sign a non-aggression treaty, the Molotov-Ribbentrop Pact. In a secret addition to the pact, the Baltic states, Finland, Romania, and Poland are divided between the two nations.
  • 1966 Lunar Orbiter 1 takes the first photograph of Earth from orbit around the Moon.
  • 1990 Saddam Hussein appears on Iraqi state television with a number of Western “guests” (actually hostages) to try to prevent the Gulf War.
  • 1991 The World Wide Web is opened to the public.
  • 1994 Eugene Bullard, the only African American pilot in World War I, is posthumously commissioned as Second Lieutenant in the United States Air Force.
  • 2011 A 5.8 earthquake occurs in Mineral, Virginia, the earthquake is felt as far north as Ontario and as far south as Atlanta, Georgia. Damage occurs to monuments in Washington D.C. and the resulted damage is estimated at $100 Million.

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On a rural road a state trooper pulled this farmer over and said: “Sir, do you realize your wife fell out of the car several miles back?”
To which the farmer replied: “Thank Goodness! I thought I had gone deaf!”
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An elderly couple were killed in an accident and found themselves being given a tour of heaven by Saint Peter. “Here is your oceanside condo, over there are the tennis courts, swimming pool, and two golf courses. If you need any refreshments, just stop by any of the many bars located throughout the area.”
“My word Gloria!” the old man hissed when Saint Peter walked off, “We could have been here ten years ago if you hadn’t heard about all that stupid oat bran, wheat germ, and low-fat diets!”
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ONE-LINERS: It Doesn’t Surprise Me That There is a…
– Rudeville, New Jersey
– Boring, Oregon
– Hell, Michigan

– Hooker, California
– Virgin, Utah
– Dulls Corner, Maryland

– Bowlegs, Oklahoma
– Volcano, Hawaii
– Beersville, Pennsylvania

– Fleatown, Ohio
– Burnt Corn, Alabama
– Two Guns, Arizona
– Toad Suck, Arkansas
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Not long ago I met the waitress of my dreams.
About halfway through dinner I called the waitress over and said, “Ma’am, this potato is bad.”
She nodded, picked up the potato and smacked it. Then she put it back on my plate and said, “Sir, if that potato causes any more trouble, you just let me know.”
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WORD OF THE DAY: dactyloscopy (dak-tuh-LOS-kuh-pee)

MEANING:
noun The analysis of fingerprints for identification of individuals.

ETYMOLOGY:
From Greek dactylo- (finger or toe) + -scopy (observation). Earliest documented use: 1908.

USAGE:
“Doctor Oloriz, from Madrid, tried to introduce dactyloscopy into the police force, with prints from those arrested carefully classified.”
Marc Pastor; Barcelona Shadows; Pushkin Press; 2014.
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Beginnings of Finger Printing. . .
fingerprint analysis
By William James Herschel (1833-1917) – Public Domain, Link
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A pipe burst in a doctor’s house. He called a plumber. The plumber arrived, unpacked his tools, did mysterious plumber-type things for a while, and handed the doctor a bill for $600.
The doctor exclaimed, “This is ridiculous! I don’t even make that much as a doctor!”
The plumber waited for him to finish and quietly said, “Neither did I when I was a doctor.”
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WARNING! ENTERING THE PUN ZONE!

There was a man who entered a local newspaper’s pun contest.
He sent in ten different puns, in the hope that at least one of the puns would win.
Unfortunately, no pun in ten did.
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“Doctor, I’m having severe anxiety attacks, what should I do?”
“When I have anxiety attacks, I go home and have my wife give me a back massage. Always works for me.”
Later I went back to the doc and said, “Thanks, Doc! That was great advice! And by the way, you have a beautiful house!”
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Four farmers were seated at the bar in a tavern. At the table next to them sat a young girl.
The first man said, “I think it’s WOOMB.”

The second replied, “No, it must be WOOOOMBH.”
The third said, “You both have it wrong — it’s WOOM.”

The fourth stated, “No, it has to be WOOMMMMBBB.”
At this, the young lady could stand it no longer. She got up, walked over to the farmers and said, “Look. It’s WOMB. That’s it, that’s all there is to it.” Then she left.

Eventually, one of the farmers broke the silence by saying, “Well. I don’t know. A young girl like that. I don’t see how she could know. I’ll bet she’s never even heard an elephant pass wind!”
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Will Rogers, having paid too much income tax one year, tried in vain to claim a rebate. His numerous letters and queries remained unanswered.
Eventually the form for the next year’s return arrived. In the section marked “DEDUCTIONS,” Rogers listed: “Bad debt, US Government — $40,000.”
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Pardon me, lady,” said the man trying to get back to his seat in the darkened movie theater, “but did I step on your toes a few minutes ago?”
“You certainly did!” said the woman in the aisle seat.
“Good, then I’m in the right row,” the man said as he went back to his seat.
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TODAY IN TRIVIA: What makes a diamond so special? Diamond is the hardest material known to man and one of the two best known forms (or allotropes) of carbon, whose hardness and high dispersion of light make it useful for industrial applications and jewelry. Diamonds are specifically renowned as a mineral with superlative physical qualities — they make excellent abrasives because they can be scratched only by other diamonds, Borazon, ultrahard fullerite, or aggregated diamond nanorods, which also means they hold a polish extremely well and retain luster.

~ Is there a Muppet who is HIV positive? In South Africa, there is a muppet on Sesame Street that is HIV positive. Africa has an overwhelming amount of HIV victims. Sesame Street is an educational program for kids, so it makes sense that they would try to inform them of HIV at a young age. The Muppet, Kami, talks about how she has HIV and they discusses how it’s important to talk with your parents about it and it is safe to give people who are HIV positive a hug.

~ Which movie had the first editing? Moviegoers tend to take the film editing process for granted today. However, the very concept of it was revolutionary at the turn of the century. The first film shot and edited with intercutting for a more complex narrative rather than telling a story as if it were a filmed stage play was Edwin S. Porter’s innovative The Life of an American Fireman in 1902. It was the first film to use editing to tell a story from two points of view, and to intercut between two places and courses of action.
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QUIP OF THE DAY: “Thinking is hard work, which is why you don’t see many people doing it.” ― Sue Grafton

THAT’S (ALMOST) ALL FOLKS!

Thought for the day. . . “Those who are not looking for happiness are the most likely to find it, because those who are searching forget that the surest way to be happy is to seek happiness for others.” ― Martin Luther King Jr.

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