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January 3rd

There are two educations. One should teach us how to make a living and the other how to live. – John Adams

TODAY – JANUARY 3rd

3rd day of the year with 362 days to follow (363 in leap years).



Holidays for Today:
~ Drinking Straw Day
~ Festival of Sleep Day
~ Fruitcake Toss Day
~ Humiliation Day (Recognize and value all mankind, not humiliate your fellow man)
~ Memento Mori “Remember You Die” Day (“Seize the day because remember, we die”)
~ National Chocolate Covered Cherry Day
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BIRTHDAYS ON THIS DATE:

  • 1793 Lucretia Coffin Mott, Nantucket, Maine, teacher, Quaker minister, abolitionist, women’s rights activist
  • 1879 Grace Anna Goodhue Coolidge, Burlington, Vermont, First lady (1923-29), teacher for the deaf (voted 1 of America’s twelve greatest living women in 1931)
  • 1880 Francis Browne, Irish photographer (most well known photos of the RMS Titanic, passengers & crew before it sank in 1912)
  • 1892 J. R. R. Tolkien, British (born in S. Africa), author (The Hobbit, Lord of the Rings, The Silmarillion)
  • 1909 Victor Borge, Copenhagen, Denmark, pianist/comedian
  • 1950 Victoria Principal, Fukuoka, Japan, American actress (Dallas, Blind Witness, Titans)
  • 1956 Mel Gibson, Peekskill, New York, American-Australian actor (Mad Max, Lethal Weapon, Braveheart, The Patriot, Signs, The Expendables) and director
  • 1975 Jason Marsden, Providence, Rhode Island, actor (Extreme Ghostbusters, Jungle Cubs, Step by Step, The Weekenders, Static Shock, W.I.T.C.H., G.I. Joe: Renegades, The Fairly OddParents, Transformers: Rescue Bots)
  • 1975 Danica McKellar, La Jolla, California, actress (The Wonder Years, Young Justice, Transformers: Rescue Bots, Mommy, I Didn’t Do It)

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The god of Victory is said to be one-handed, but Peace gives victory to both sides. – Ralph Waldo Emerson
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HISTORICAL HAPPENINGS:

  • 1871 Henry W. Bradley patents oleomargarine, “a compound for culinary use”.
  • 1924 British Egyptologist Howard Carter finds sarcophagus of Tutankhamen in the Valley of the Kings, near Luxor, Egypt.
  • 1938 The March of Dimes is established by President Franklin D. Roosevelt.
  • 1947 Proceedings of the U.S. Congress are televised for the first time.
  • 1959 Alaska is admitted as the 49th U.S. State.
  • 1977 Apple Computer incorporated.
  • 1987 Aretha Franklin becomes the first woman inducted into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame.
  • 1999 The Mars Polar Lander is launched.
  • 2000 Final daily edition of the Peanuts comic strip.
  • 2009 The first block of the blockchain of the decentralized payment system Bitcoin, called the Genesis block, was established by the creator of the system, Satoshi Nakamoto.

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An elderly gentleman was reading his recovery-room record at the hospital where I work.

He looked quite concerned at one notation.

“I know I was in a bit of a muddle, but I didn’t realize I was that bad,” he said to me apologetically. “I hope I didn’t offend anyone.”

He was greatly relieved when I explained the acronym in question meant “Short Of Breath” and not what he thought.

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Joe was in court charged with parking his car in a restricted area. The judge asked him if he had anything to say in his defense.

“They should not put up such misleading notices,” said Joe.

“It said, FINE FOR PARKING HERE.”

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ONE-LINERS:You’ll Know It’s a No-Frills Airline If:

1. They don’t sell tickets, they sell chances.

2. All the insurance machines in the terminal are sold out.

3. Before the flight, the passengers get together and elect a pilot.

4. If you kiss the wing for luck before boarding, it kisses you back.

5. You cannot board the plane unless you have the exact change.

6. Before you took off, the stewardess tells you to fasten your Velcro.

7. The Captain asks all the passengers to chip in a little for gas.

8. When they pull the steps away, the plane starts rocking.

9. The Captain yells at the ground crew to get the cows off the runway.

10. You ask the Captain how often their planes crash and he sez, “Just once.”

11. No movie. Don’t need one.

12. Your life keeps flashing before your eyes.

13. You see a man with a gun, but he’s demanding to be let off the plane.

14. All the planes have both a bathroom and a chapel.

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Last summer, my husband, Bill, took me camping for the first time. At every opportunity, he passed along outdoor-survival lore.

One day we got lost hiking in the deep woods. Bill tried the usual tactics to determine direction – moss on the trees (there was no moss), direction of the sun (it was an overcast day). Just as I was beginning to panic, he spotted a small cabin off in the distance. Bill pulled out his binoculars, studied the cabin, turned and led us right back to our camp.

“That was terrific,” I said. “How did you do it?”

“Simple,” he replied. “In this part of the country all TV satellite dishes point south.”

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In honor of J. R. R. Tolkien’s birthday…


Remember, way before the movies, there were the books…
and they are better. 🙂
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PUN ZONE Book Titles!
~ Some Like it Sweet: Sugar Kane
~ Oh What A Relief It Is: Al Kaseltzer
~ New Mexico Tour Book: Albie Kerky
~ I Was A Son Of A Buccaneer: Rich Kidd
~ The Palace Roof has a Hole: Lee King
~ Lawn Care: Ray King
~ Exercise on Wheels: Cy Kling
~ I Hate the Sun: Gladys Knight
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An off-duty police officer, familiar with radar guns, drove through a school zone within the legal speed limit when the flash of a camera went off, taking a picture of his license plate.

The officer, thinking the radar was in error, drove by again; even more slowly. Another flash. He did it again for a third time, at an even slower speed. Same result.

“This guy must have screwed up the settings,” the off-duty officer thought.

A few weeks later, when he received the violations in the mail, he discovered three traffic tickets: each for not wearing a seat belt!

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After a lengthy quarrel, a wife said to her husband, “You know, I was a fool when I married you.”

The husband replied: “Yes, dear, but I was in love and didn’t notice it.”
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A husband read an article to his wife about how many words women use a day… 30,000 to a man’s 15,000. The wife replied, “The reason has to be because we have to repeat everything to men…

The husband then turned to his wife and asked,

“What?”

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In a hat shop a saleslady gushed: “That’s the hat for you! It makes you look ten years younger.”

“Then I don’t want it,” retorted the customer. “I certainly can’t afford to put on ten years every time I take off my hat!”

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TODAY IN TRIVIA: Lord of the Rings Trivia .

~Who are Durin’s Folk? A clan of Dwarves (also called the Longbeards) that originally inhabited Moria in the Misty Mountains, led by Durin I.

~ Who was The Witch-king of Angmar? He was the leader of the Nazgûl or Ringwraiths, and Sauron’s second-in-command during the Second and Third Ages. Once a Númenórean king of men, he was corrupted by one of the nine Rings of Power that had been given to the lords of men, and became an undead wraith in the service of Sauron. He was killed in the Battle of the Pelennor Fields by Meriadoc Brandybuck and Éowyn, niece of King Théoden, at the end of the War.

~ What main character was also known as Estil? Aragorn, who became King of Gondor, was known as Estil during the time he was fostered in Rivendell. Aragorn possessed Elven wisdom due to his childhood in Rivendell with Elrond and the foresight of his race, the Dúnedain. He was also a skilled healer, a mighty warrior and an unmatched commander.

There is no indication of his ever doubting his role and destiny as the future king of the Reunited Kingdom and one of the leaders of the war against Sauron (as he did in Peter Jackson’s film). Indeed, one of the biggest flaws of the films were the way the character traits of several of the main participants were distorted in the story, making them into someone different than how they were portrayed in the books.


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QUIP OF THE DAY: If you laid all of the lawyers in the world end-to-end around the equator, it would be a good idea to leave them there.

THAT’S (ALMOST) ALL FOLKS!

Thought for the day. . . We are not creatures of circumstance; we are creators of circumstance. – Benjamin Disraeli

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