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January 6th

Live in the sunshine, swim the sea, drink the wild air… – Ralph Waldo Emerson


TODAY – JANUARY 6th

6th day of the year with 359 days to follow (360 in leap years).

Holidays for Today:
~ National Bean Day
~ National Cuddle Up Day
~ National Shortbread Day
~ National Technology Day
~ Three Kings Day
~ International Creativity Month
~ National Mail Order Gardening Month
~ Epiphany (the 12th day after Christmas, celebrating the visit of the three kings or wise men to the Christ Child, signifying the extension of salvation to the Gentiles)
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BIRTHDAYS ON THIS DATE:

  • 1412 Joan of Arc, French saint
  • 1655 Jakob Bernoulli, Switzerland, mathematician (first person to develop the technique for solving separable differential equations)
  • 1745 Étienne Montgolfier, France, inventor (montgolfière-style hot air balloon, globe aérostatique)
  • 1795 Anselme Payen, French chemist (enzyme diastase, and the carbohydrate cellulose)
  • 1799 Jedediah Strong Smith, Bainbridge, New York, fur trader/ explorer (Rocky Mts. west coast, southwest)
  • 1878 Carl Sandburg, Galesburg, Illinois, poet/ biographer of Lincoln (The People, Yes)
  • 1883 Khalil Gibran, Lebanese-American poet (The Prophet, Broken Wings)
  • 1912 Danny Thomas, Deerfield, Michigan, actor/ comedian/ founder St. Jude Children’s Research Hospital (Make Room for Daddy, Danny Thomas Show)
  • 1913 Loretta Young, Salt Lake City, Utah, actress (Farmer’s Daughter, Stranger)
  • 1924 Earl Scruggs, Flint Hill, North Carolina, musician (perfected 3-finger style on 5-string banjo; Flatt & Scruggs- Ballad of Jed Clampett, Rocky Top, There Ain’t No Country Music on This Jukebox)
  • 1925 John Z DeLorean, Detroit, Michigan, engineer/ founder DeLorean Motor Co. (designed Pontiac GTO & Firebird, & DeLorean DMC-12 sports car, which was later featured in the movie Back to the Future)
  • 1931 E. L. Doctorow, Bronx, New York, author (Welcome to Hard Times, Ragtime, Sweet Land Stories, Andrew’s Brain)
  • 1937 Lou Holtz, Follansbee, West Virginia, football player, coach, and sportscaster (ESPN)
  • 1948 Guy Gardner, Altavista, Virginia, NASA astronaut (pilot 2 Space Shuttle missions; STS-27, STS-35) /12th  President of Williamson Free School of Mechanical Trades
  • 1957 C. Michael Foale, England, astrophysicist/ NASA astronaut (STS-45, STS-56, STS-63, STS-84, Mir NASA-4 (Mir EO-23 and 24), STS-86, STS-103, Soyuz TMA-3, Expedition 8)
  • 1957 Nancy Lopez, Torrance, California, golfer (won 48 LPGA Tour events, including 3 major championships)
  • 1960 Andrea Thompson, Ohio, actress (Falcon Crest, Babylon 5, JAG, 24, Heroes, NYPD Blue )
  • 1960 Nigella Lawson, English chef and author (How to Be a Domestic Goddess), cooking show (Nigella Bites)
  • 1976 Danny Pintauro, Milltown, New Jersey, actor (Who’s the Boss? )
  • 1976 Johnny Yong Bosch, Kansas City, Missouri, actor, voice actor, and musician (Adam Park/ Mighty Morphin Power Rangers; Vash the Stampede/ Trigun; Bleach, Akira, Anime TV)

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God must become an activity in our consciousness. –  Joel S. Goldsmith
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HISTORICAL HAPPENINGS:

  • 1838 Samuel Morse made 1st public demonstration of telegraph.
  • 1853 President-elect of the United States Franklin Pierce and his family are involved in a train wreck near Andover, Massachusetts.
  • 1857 Patent for reducing zinc ore granted to Samuel Wetherill, Pennsylvania.
  • 1893 The Washington National Cathedral is chartered by Congress. The charter is signed by President Benjamin Harrison.
  • 1907 Maria Montessori opens her first school and daycare center for working class children in Rome.
  • 1912 New Mexico becomes 47th state.
  • 1929 Mother Teresa arrives in Calcutta to begin her work among India’s poorest and sick people.
  • 1930 The first diesel-engined automobile trip is completed, from Indianapolis, Indiana, to New York City.
  • 1931 Thomas Edison submits his last patent application.
  • 1936 The Supreme Court of the United States rules that the 1933 Agricultural Adjustment Act is unconstitutional in the case United States v. Butler et al.
  • 1941 President Franklin Delano Roosevelt delivers his Four Freedoms Speech in the State of the Union Address (speech, worship, from want & from fear).
  • 1942 Pan American Airlines becomes the first commercial airline to schedule a flight around the world.
  • 1958 Bollingen Prize for poetry awarded to ee cummings.
  • 1963 “Mutual of Omaha’s Wild Kingdom” with Marlin Perkins begins on NBC.
  • 1967 Vietnam War: United States Marine Corps and ARVN troops launch “Operation Deckhouse Five” in the Mekong River delta.
  • 1973 “Schoolhouse Rock” premieres on ABC-TV with Multiplication Rock.
  • 1974 In response to the 1973 energy crisis, daylight saving time commences nearly four months early in the United States.
  • 1975 “Wheel Of Fortune” day-time version debuted on NBC-TV.
  • 1978 The Crown of St. Stephen (also known as the Holy Crown of Hungary) is returned to Hungary from the United States, where it was held after World War II.
  • 2005 American Civil Rights Movement: Edgar Ray Killen is arrested as a suspect in the 1964 murders of three civil rights workers.

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The Lone Ranger and Tonto camped in the desert, set up their tent, and are asleep. Some hours later, The Lone Ranger wakes his faithful friend.

“Tonto, look up at the sky and tell me what you see.”
Tonto replies, “Me see millions of stars.

“What does that tell you?” ask The Lone Ranger.
Tonto ponders for a minute.

“Astronomically speaking, it tells me that there are millions of galaxies and potentially billions of planets. Astrologically, it tells me that Saturn is in Leo. Time wise, it appears to be approximately a quarter past three. Theologically, it’s evident the Lord is all powerful and we are small and insignificant. Meteorologically, it seems we will have a beautiful day tomorrow. What it tell you, Kemo Sabe?”

The Lone Ranger is silent for a moment, then speaks.
“Tonto, you idiot, someone has stolen our tent.”
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“SPCA, how can I help you?”
“Is this the SPCA?”

“Yes, what can I do for you?”
“I want you to send somebody over right away.”

“What’s wrong?”
“There’s a horrid magazine salesman sitting in a tree teasing my dog.”
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ONE-LINERS: Top 13 Signs That You’re All Grown Up…

13. Your potted plants stay alive.
12. 6:00 AM is when you get up, not when you go to sleep.
11. You hear your favorite song on an elevator.

10. You carry an umbrella. You watch the Weather Channel.
9. You go from 130 days of vacation time to seven.
8. Jeans and a sweater no longer qualify as ‘dressed up’.

7. You’re the one calling the police because those kids next door don’t know how to turn down the stereo.
6. You don’t know what time Taco Bell closes.
5. Your car insurance goes down and your car payments go up.

4. You feed your dog Science Diet instead of McDonald’s.
3. Sleeping on the couch makes your back hurt.
2. You actually eat breakfast foods at breakfast time.

… and the Number One Sign that you’re All Grown Up:
1. Most of the time you spend in front of a computer is for work.
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As my five year old son and I were headed out for lunch, we passed a traffic accident. Usually when we see something terrible like that, we say a prayer for those who might be hurt, so I pointed and said to my son, “We should pray.”

From the back seat I heard his earnest request: “Please, God, don’t let those cars block the entrance to McDonald’s.”

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At a college basketball game a guy sitting in the student section kept hollering at one particular official, “I got your cell phone.”

When there was a break in the game and the official happened to be on that end of the court, the official asked the student why he thought he had his cell phone.

The student replied, “It must be yours. It has 17 missed calls.”

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pic of the day: Cat on Picnic Table

cat sleeping on picnic table
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GOLDEN OLDIE… A young preacher was contacted by the local funeral director to hold a grave side committal service at a small local cemetery for someone with no family or friends. The preacher started early but quickly got himself lost, making several wrong turns. He arrived a half-hour late, the hearse was no where in site, and the workmen were eating lunch.

The pastor went to the open grave and found the vault lid already in place. Taking out his book, he read the service. As he was returning to his car, he overheard one of the workmen say: “Maybe we’d better tell him it’s a septic tank.”
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NEW YEAR’S RESOLUTIONS

2016: I will get my weight down below 180 pounds.

2017: I will follow my new diet religiously until I get below 200 pounds.

2018: I will develop a realistic attitude about my weight.

2019: I will work out 3 days a week.

2020: I will try to drive past a gym at least once a week.
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WARNING! PUN ZONE for SENIORS!

If you’ve spent retirement days
Relaxing, you must mend your ways.
Old age is seductive
But should be productive.
Don’t yield to the thrill of the chaise.
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Deli owner to IRS agent: “Why don’t you people leave me alone? I work like a dog, everyone in my family helps out, the place is only closed three days a year … and you want to know how I made $80,000 last year?”

“It’s not your income that bothers us, sir. It’s these deductions. You deducted the cost of six trips to Hawaii for you and your wife.”

“Oh, that. Didn’t I mention? We deliver anywhere.”

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Several men are in the golf club locker room. A cell phone on a bench rings and a man engages the hands-free speaker function and begins to talk. Everyone else in the room stops to listen.

“Hello?”

A woman’s voice says, “Honey, it’s me. Are you at the club?”

“Yes.”

“I’m at the mall now and I found this beautiful leather coat. It’s only a thousand dollars. Is it OK if I buy it?”

“Sure, go ahead if you like it that much.”

“I also stopped by the Mercedes dealership and saw the new models. I saw one I really liked.”

“How much?”

“$65,000.”

“OK, but for that price I want it with all the options.”

“Great! Oh, and one more thing The house we wanted last year is back on the market. They’re asking $950,000.”

“Well, then go ahead and give them an offer of $900,000.”

“OK. I’ll see you later! I love you!”

“Bye, I love you, too.”

The man hangs up. The other men in the locker room are looking at him in astonishment. Then he asks, “Anyone know whose phone this is?”

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Customer: “I’ve been ringing 700-4300 for two days and can’t get through to enquiries, can you help?”

Operator: “Where did you get that number from, sir?”.

Customer: “It was on the door to the Travel Center”.

Operator: “Sir, they are the hours we are open”.
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One of my friends works in the customer service call center of a national pager company. There, he deals with the usual complaints regarding poor pager operation, as well as the occasional crank caller demanding to be paged less often, more often, or by more interesting people.

The best call came from Bubba, who repeatedly complained that he keeps being paged by “Lucille.”

He was instructed that he would have to call her and tell her to stop paging him.

“She don’t never leave no number, so I can’t call her back,” he said.

After three such calls, someone thought to ask how he knew it was Lucille if she didn’t leave a number.

“She leaves her name,” was the reply.

After establishing that the customer had a numeric-only pager, the light bulb came on.

“How does she spell her name?” the service rep asked.

“L-O-W C-E-L-L”

Another technical problem solved.

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TODAY’S TRIVIA: What is National Bean Day? It’s a day to celebrate all kinds of beans, in all kinds of sizes, shapes, and colors. Beans (legumes) have been cultivated since the early seventh millennium BC. Beans provide a significant source of protein and fiber. They are low in fat and are high in complex carbohydrates, folate, and iron, too.

~ What is Shortbread? This cookie is a classic Scottish treat. Its high-fat content provided by the butter or other fat results in a short-bread crumb, or short” (crumbly) texture. Prepared often during the 12th century, Mary, Queen of Scots receives credit for the innovation of the shortbread during the 16th century. As it was expensive to make, the sweet cookie was reserved as a luxury for special occasions.

~ Will Twinkies survive a nuclear war? An urban legend holds that twinkies are chemically synthesized and require no baking. As a result, they supposedly have a nearly limitless shelf-life and could potentially “survive a nuclear war” (like cockroaches). In practice, twinkies last only about 25 days before degrading substantially in quality — though they do last longer than most other baked goods due to the fact that the filling is not actually dairy.

~ How were ‘vile humours’ removed from the body? Medical treatment, during the seventeenth and eighteenth centuries, was aimed at ridding the sick of “vile humours” by vomiting, purging, and bleeding. The treatment was often the immediate cause of death. Some prescriptions called for “letting” more blood than is now known to exist in the whole body.
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QUIP OF THE DAY: I have to power walk early in the morning, before my brain figures out what I’m doing.

Bonus Quip: My New Year’s resolution is to help all my friends gain ten pounds so I look skinnier.

THAT’S (ALMOST) ALL FOLKS!

Thought for the day. . .
Just because we’ve been dealt a certain hand, it doesn’t mean that we can’t choose to rise above – to conquer the boundaries of a destiny that none of us wanted. To try to retain whatever essential humanity we can. – Stephenie Meyer, Twilight, 2005

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