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July 10th

It is not what you do for your children, but what you have taught them to do for themselves, that will make them successful human beings. – Ann Landers

TODAY – JULY 10th

191st day of the year (192nd in leap years) with 174 days to follow.

Holidays for Today:
~ Clerihew Day (a whimsical, four-line biographical poem invented by Edmund Clerihew Bentley)
~ Don’t Step on a Bee Day
~ National Piña Colada Day
~ Nikola Tesla Day
~ Teddy Bear Picnic Day
~ Wyoming Statehood Day
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BIRTHDAYS ON THIS DATE:

  • 1564 John Calvin, French theologian and pastor during Protestant Reformation (Calvinism)
  • 1839 Adolphus Busch, German-born co-founder of Anheuser-Busch
  • 1856 Nikola Tesla, Serb-American inventor (best known for developing the modern alternating current (AC) electrical supply system)
  • 1920 David Brinkley, Wilmington, North Carolina, newscaster (1943-1997), author (Washington Goes To War)
  • 1921 Harvey Ball, Worcester, Massachusetts, inventor (earliest known designer of the smiley, which became an enduring and notable international icon)
  • 1922 Jean Kerr, Scranton, Pennsylvania, author (Please Don’t Eat the Daisies)
  • 1926 Fred Gwynne, NYC, New York, actor (Car 54 Where Are You?, The Munsters, Pet Sematary, My Cousin Vinny)
  • 1943 Arthur Ashe, Richmond, Virginia, tennis player (won 3 Grand Slam titles)
  • 1945 Ron Glass, Evansville, Indiana, actor (Det. Ron Harris in Barney Miller, Shepherd Derrial Book in Firefly & Serenity)
  • 1976 Adrian Grenier, Santa Fe, New Mexico, actor (Entourage, The Devil Wears Prada, Miles from Tomorrowland)
  • 1980 Thomas Ian Nicholas, Las Vegas, Nevada, actor (Rookie of the Year, American Pie film series, Walt Before Mickey, Red Band Society)

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We become what we think about. – Earl Nightingale
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HISTORICAL HAPPENINGS:

  • 1821 The United States takes possession of its newly bought territory of Florida from Spain.
  • 1850 Millard Fillmore is inaugurated as the 13th President of the United States upon the death of President Zachary Taylor, 16 months into his term.
  • 1890 Wyoming is admitted as the 44th U.S. state.
  • 1938 Howard Hughes sets a new record by completing a 91 hour airplane flight around the world.
  • 1962 Telstar, the world’s first communications satellite, is launched into orbit.
  • 1966 The Chicago Freedom Movement, led by Martin Luther King, Jr., holds a rally at Soldier Field in Chicago, Illinois. As many as 60,000 people came to hear Dr. King as well as Mahalia Jackson, Stevie Wonder, and Peter Paul and Mary.
  • 1978 World News Tonight premieres on ABC.
  • 2000 EADS, the world’s second-largest aerospace group is formed by the merger of Aérospatiale-Matra, DASA, and CASA.
  • 2002 At a Sotheby’s auction, Peter Paul Rubens’ painting The Massacre of the Innocents is sold for £49.5million (US$76.2 million) to Lord Thomson.
  • 2005 Hurricane Dennis slams into the Florida Panhandle, causing billions of dollars in damage.
  • 2007 Erden Eruç begins the first solo human-powered circumnavigation of the world.

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I brought my car into our Hyundai dealership complaining of rattling noises. Later, I noticed the technician’s comment on the incident sheet: “CTIP”.
I asked what that meant. He said, “Customer Thinks It’s a Porsche.”
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I sent that “Ancestry” site some information on my family tree and they sent me back a packet of seeds and suggested that I just start over.
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A guy goes into the police station to file a missing persons report. He says to the desk officer, “My wife is missing. She went shopping hasn’t come back yet.”
“What is her height?”
“Average, I guess.”

“Build?”
Husband: “Not slim… probably healthy.”

“Hair color?”
“Changes according to season. Blonde, I think.”

“What was she wearing?”
“I’m not sure, either a dress or a suit, probably.”

“Was she driving?”
“Yes.”

“What kind of car?”
“Black Audi A6 with supercharged 3.0 litre V6 engine generating 333 horsepower teamed with an eight-speed tiptronic automatic transmission with manual mode. It has full LED headlights and a very thin scratch on the front left door.”
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ONE-LINERS: TIPS ON ENJOYING LIFE

~ Say something positive as early in the day as possible.
~ Believe in miracles, but don’t depend on them.
~ Seek respect rather popularity; quality rather than luxury.

~ If your mom says “you’ll regret it” you probably will.
~ Be happy with what you have while working on what you want.
~ Celebrate even small victories.

~ When in doubt, smile.
~ Spend time with people who are little bit better than you.
~ Don’t write something you don’t want others to read.

~ Become the world’s most thoughtful friend.
~ Anything worth doing is going to take longer that you think.
~ Accept triumph and defeat with equal grace.

~ It’s not your job to get people to like you; it’s your job to like people.
~ Stand up for your principles, even if you have to stand alone.
~ If you know you are going to lose, do it with style.

~ Read something no one else is reading; Think something no one else is thinking; And do something no one else is doing.
~ Work diligently. Give generously. Pray faithfully. Love deeply.
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A brunette, a redhead and a blonde went to Mexico for spring break. They got drunk, woke up in prison and learned that they were to be executed at sunup.

The redhead is strapped into the electric chair. The warden asks if she has any last words. She says, “I am a student at Trinity Bible College and I believe in the almighty power of God to intervene on the behalf of the innocent.”

The warden throws the switch. NOTHING HAPPENS! He begs for forgiveness, and releases her.

The brunette is strapped in and pronounces her last words: “I am a law student at Indiana University and I believe in the power of Justice to intervene on the behalf of the innocent.”

The warden throws the switch and nothing happens AGAIN! The Mexican guards release her.

The blonde is strapped in and says, “I’m an Electrical Engineering student at The Ohio State University and I’ll tell you right now, you won’t electrocute anybody if you don’t plug that thing in.”
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“I am sorry, madam, but I shall have to charge you hundred dollars for pulling your boy’s tooth.”

“One hundred dollars! Why, I understood you to say that you charged only twenty dollars for such work!”

“Yes,” replied the dentist, “but this youngster yelled so terribly that he scared four other patients out of the office.”
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WARNING! ENTERING THE PUN ZONE!
~ In 1911, The first ice cream cone was shown at a press party. Newsmen got a big scoop.
~ Aug. 10, 1913, The first rodeo was held, and cowboys got a few bucks out of it.
~ In 1920, The patent for malted milk was sold for $100. The buyer got a fair shake.
~ In 1932, The first diet club was formed, but it was a losing proposition.
~ In 1949, Calculators were first used. They were so successful they began to multiply.
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Reasons Computers Must be Male
~ They have a lot of data but are still clueless.
~ A better model is always just around the corner.
~ They look nice and shiny until you bring them home.
~ It is always necessary to have a backup.
~ They’ll do whatever you say if you push the right buttons.
~ The best part of having either one is the games you can play.
~ The lights are on but nobody’s home.
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There was a glass of water on the table…
One man says, “It’s half full”. He is an optimist.
Second man says, “It’s half empty”. He is a pessimist.
Third man says, “It’s twice too big”. He is a management consultant.
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I found a letter lying on my doormat. On the envelope it said in big letters, “DO NOT BEND”.
I spent two hours trying to figure out how to pick it up.
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As the congregation filed out of the church, one parishioner Said to the pastor, “Today your sermon reminded me of the peace and love of God.”
The pastor replied, “Why … nobody has ever said anything like that about my preaching before. Please tell me why.”
“Because it endured forever.”
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Three doctors are in the duck blind and a bird flies overhead. The general practitioner looks at it and says, “Looks like a duck, flies like a duck… it’s probably a duck,” shoots at it but misses and the bird flies away.

The next bird flies overhead, and the pathologist looks at it, then looks through the pages of a bird manual, and says, “Hmmmm…green wings, yellow bill, quacking sound…might be a duck.” He raises his gun to shoot it, but the bird is long gone.

A third bird flies over. The surgeon raises his gun and shoots almost without looking, brings the bird down, and turns to the pathologist and says, “Go see if that was a duck.”
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TODAY’S TRIVIA: How does a grebe rescue its chicks? The grebe, an aquatic bird, has an effective means of escaping danger while protecting its young. At the first sign of danger, it will sink into the water until its back is level with the surface. This allows its offspring to swim over and quickly climb onto its back. The parent grebe then rises up to its swimming position and ferries the chicks across the water to safety.

~ Who was the first American saint? Elizabeth Ann Seton was the first native-born American to be sainted. She was born on August 28, 1774 in New York. She was sainted in the Holy Year of 1975.

~ How many books were published post Gutenberg? Just 50 years after Johannes Gutenberg invented his printing press in the mid-15th century, more than 6 million books had been published on law, science, poetry, politics, and religion.
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QUIP OF THE DAY: Doctors can be frustrating. You wait a month-and-a-half for an appointment, and when he examines you he says, “I wish you’d come to me sooner.” (Amen!)

THAT’S (ALMOST) ALL FOLKS!

Thought for the day. . . Make up your mind to act decidedly and take the consequences. No good is ever done in this world by hesitation. – Thomas H. Huxley

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