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June 4th

Humility is not thinking less of yourself, it’s thinking of yourself less. – C. S. Lewis


TODAY – JUNE 4th

155th day of the year (156th in leap years) with 210 days to follow.

Holidays for Today:
~ Hug Your Cat Day
~ National Adopt A Cat Month
~ National Cheese Day
~ National Cognac Day
~ National Old Maid’s Day
~ National SAFE Day (education for responsible gun ownership)
~ National Give a Bunch of Balloons Month
~ International Day of Innocent Children Victims of Aggression
~ International Tiananmen Square Protests of 1989 Memorial Day
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BIRTHDAYS ON THIS DATE:

  • 1924 Dennis Weaver, Joplin, Missouri, actor (Gunsmoke, McCloud, Gentle Ben, Duel, Stone, Buck James, Centennial)
  • 1936 Bruce Dern, Chicago, Illinois, actor (They Shoot Horses, Don’t They?, Silent Running, Black Sunday, Coming Home, Down Periscope, Last Man Standing, The Astronaut Farmer, Nebraska, Cut Bank)
  • 1937 Freddy Fender, San Benito, Texas, musician (Before the Next Teardrop Falls, Wasted Days and Wasted Nights)
  • 1937 Robert Fulghum, Waco, Texas, author (All I Really Needed to Know I Learned in Kindergarten)
  • 1943 Joyce Meyer, St. Louis, Missouri, charismatic Christian author & speaker (The Secret Power of Speaking God’s Word, Approval Addiction, The Power of Simple Prayer, Change Your Words Change Your Life)
  • 1944 Michelle Phillips, Long Beach, California, singer (The Mamas & the Papas) and actress (Dillinger, Valentino, 7th Heaven)
  • 1956 Keith David, Harlem, New York, actor (Crash, There’s Something About Mary, Barbershop, Men at Work, The Thing, Pitch Black, voice – Gargoyles, Halo 2 & 3, Saints Row, The Princess & the Frog, Final Fantasy, Enlisted)
  • 1967 Robert Shane Kimbrough, Kileen, Texas, Apache helicopter pilot, astronaut (STS-126)
  • 1971 Noah Wyle, Hollywood, California, actor (ER, Falling Skies, The Librarian, Pirates of Silicon Valley)
  • 1975 Angelina Jolie, Los Angeles, California, actress (Lara Croft: Tomb Raider, Cradle of Life; Mr. & Mrs. Smith, Wanted, Changeling, Maleficent)
  • 1981 T. J. Miller, Denver, Colorado, actor and comedian (Gulliver’s Travels, Tuffnut in How to Train Your Dragon, Silicone Valley)
  • 1991 Jordan Hinson, El Paso, Texas, actress (Go Figure, Zoe Carter in Eureka, Hank, Higher Power, Living Among Us)

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We become what we think about. – Earl Nightingale

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HISTORICAL HAPPENINGS:

  • 1783 The Montgolfier brothers publicly demonstrate their montgolfière (hot air balloon).
  • 1876 An express train called the Transcontinental Express arrives in San Francisco, California, via the First Transcontinental Railroad only 83 hours and 39 minutes after leaving New York City.
  • 1896 Henry Ford completes the Ford Quadricycle, his first gasoline-powered automobile, and gives it a successful test run.
  • 1912 Massachusetts becomes the first state of the United States to set a minimum wage.
  • 1917 The first Pulitzer Prizes are awarded: Laura E. Richards, Maude H. Elliott, and Florence Hall receive the first Pulitzer for biography (for Julia Ward Howe). Jean Jules Jusserand receives the first Pulitzer for history for his work With Americans of Past and Present Days. Herbert B. Swope receives the first Pulitzer for journalism for his work for the New York World.
  • 1919 U.S. Congress approves the 19th Amendment to the Constitution, which guarantees suffrage to women, and sends it to the U.S. states for ratification.
  • 1939 The MS St. Louis, a ship carrying 963 Jewish refugees, is denied permission to land in Florida, United States, after already being turned away from Cuba. Forced to return to Europe, more than 200 of its passengers later die in Nazi concentration camps.
  • 1957 Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. delivered his famous Power of Nonviolence speech at the University of California, Berkeley.
  • 1998 Terry Nichols is sentenced to life in prison for his role in the Oklahoma City bombing.
  • 2010 Falcon 9 Flight 1 was the maiden flight of the SpaceX Falcon 9 rocket, which launched from Cape Canaveral Air Force Station Space Launch Complex 40

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I had a leak in the roof over the dining room, so I called a repairman to take a look at it. He asked, “When did you first notice the leak?”

“Last night, when it took me two hours to finish my soup.”
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Catherine, a RN, was unhappy with her job, so she submitted her resignation. She was sure she’d have no trouble finding a new position, because of the nursing shortage in her area.
She e-mailed cover letters to dozens of potential employers and attached her resume to each one. Two weeks later, Catherine was dismayed and bewildered that she had not received even one request for an interview.

Finally she received a message from a prospective employer that explained the reason she hadn’t heard from anyone else.
It read: “Your resume was not attached as stated. I do, however, want to thank you for the vegetable lasagna recipe.”
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7-year-old Bethany was placing nouns under the correct heading in class. All the words were from a list.
The teacher came over and looked at her lists. There where five: Persons, Places, Things, Ideas, and … Other?

The teacher asked Bethany, “Why are there five lists?”
Bethany answered, “Because my brother didn’t fit any of the categories.”
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ONE-LINERS:
~ I have seen the truth and it makes no sense.
~ If a nickel knew what it is worth today, it would feel like two cents.
~ A lot of pessimists get that way from financing optimists.
~ If only the good die young then what does that say about senior citizens?
~ I work for a living, I don’t live for working.
~ With fuel prices skyrocketing, they should now call them gasp pumps!
~ Buffet is a French term, It means “get up and get it yourself.”
~ To a worm, digging in the hard ground is more relaxing than going fishing.
~ Is it my imagination, or do buffalo wings taste like chicken?
~ If people talk behind your back, it only means you are two steps ahead.
~ Nagging is the repetition of unpalatable truths.
~ Psychiatry enables us to correct our faults by confessing our parents’ shortcomings.
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An old man was a witness in a burglary case.
The defense lawyer asked Richard, “Did you see my client commit this burglary?”
“Yes,” said Richard , “I saw him plainly take the goods.”

The lawyer asks Richard again, “Richard, this happened at night. Are you sure you saw my client commit this crime?”
“Yes” says Richard, “I saw him do it.”

Then the lawyer asks Richard, “Richard listen, you are 80 years old and your eye sight probably is bad. Just how far can you see at night?”
Richard says, “I can see the moon, how far is that?”
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If you hear no evil and see no evil, call the TV repairman.
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A vacationer e-mailed a seaside hotel to ask its location. “It’s only a stone’s throw away from the beach,” he was told.

“But how will I recognize it?” asked the man.

The reply came back: “It’s the one with all the broken windows.”
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WARNING! PUNNY BOOK TITLES!
~ “US Elections” by Freda Vote
~ “Come on In!” by Doris Open
~ “The German Bank Robbery” by Hans Zupp
~ “I Hate the Sun” by Gladys Knight
~ “Irish First Aid” by R.U. O’Kaye
~ “My Career As a Clown” by Abe Ozo
~ “Take This Job and Shove It” by Ike Witt
~ “Rapunzel Rapunzel” by Harris Long
~ “Split Personalities” by Jacqueline Hyde
~ “How I Won the Marathon” by Randy Hoelway
~ “Lonely Days” by Anita Friend
~ “Together Forever” by Stan Bymee
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A couple arrived at town hall just before closing time and asked the judge to marry them. He asked, “Do you have a license?”
“No …”

“You can’t be married without one. You’ll have to go to the Town Clerk’s office to get a license.”
They caught the town clerk just as he was locking up and got the license. When they got back to the judge, he said, “You filled the names in backwards — the groom’s name where the bride’s belongs and vice versa. You have to get this fixed.”

They rushed back to the clerk’s office, caught him again and got another license. They raced back to the judge with it. He said, “The clerk filled in the date wrong. It’s supposed to be year-month-day.
So once again they caught the clerk. After yet another reissued license, the judge is finally satisfied. He says, “I hope you appreciate why I made you keep going back. If there are irregularities in the license, your marriage would not be legal, and any children you might have would be technically illegitimate.”
The groom said, “Funny, that’s exactly what the clerk said about you …”
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Another Definition of Marriage. . .
Marriage is a relationship in which one person is always right, and the other is a husband.
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They had been up in the attic together doing some cleaning. The kids uncovered an old manual typewriter and asked her, “Hey Mom…what’s this?”
“Oh…that’s an old typewriter,” she answered, thinking that would satisfy their curiosity.

“Well what does it do?” they asked.
“I’ll show you,” she said and returned with a blank piece of paper. She rolled the paper into the typewriter and began striking the keys, leaving black letters of print on the page.

“WOW!” they exclaimed, “that’s really cool…but how does it work like that? Where do you plug it in?”
“There is no plug,” she answered. “It doesn’t need a plug.”

“Then where do you put the batteries?” they persisted.
“It doesn’t need batteries either.” she continued.
“Wow! This is so cool!” they exclaimed. “Someone should have invented this a long time ago!”
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Dentist: “Just try to relax. I’ll have your aching tooth out in five minutes.”
Patient: “How much will this cost me?”

Dentist: “It’ll be $1000.”
Patient: “That much for just five minutes’ work?”
Dentist: “Well, if you prefer, I could pull it out very slowly.”
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TODAY’S TRIVIA: Who were the first men in black?  Sixty-three years before Tommy Lee Jones and Will Smith co-starred in the box office sci-fi smash Men in Black, the Three Stooges starred in a 19-minute comedy short also titled Men in Black (1934). Unlike the 1997 film, the goofy trio of Moe, Larry, and Curly were inept doctors at a hospital where they disrupted patients and staff.

~ What happened to Chanel’s number 1 through 4? Designer Gabrielle “Coco” Chanel introduced her first perfume in 1921. She gave it the name “Chanel No. 5.” According to Chanel, she jumped straight to number five because it was her lucky number. To add luck to the fragrance, she introduced it on the fifth day of May, the fifth month. Chanel No. 5 became the world’s best selling perfume.

~ Where was the ‘Gateway to the West?’ St. Louis was called the “Gateway to the West” in the 1800s because it served as a starting place for wagon train departures.
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QUIP OF THE DAY: “Start every day off with a smile and get it over with.” – W.C. Fields

THAT’S (ALMOST) ALL FOLKS!

Thought for the day. . . “Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn’t do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover.” – Mark Twain

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