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June 7th

To be what we are, and to become what we are capable of becoming, is the only end of life. – Robert Louis Stevenson

TODAY – JUNE 7th

158th day of the year (159th in leap years) with 207 days follow.

Holidays for Today:
~ National Chocolate Ice Cream Day
~ National Daniel Boone Day (when frontiersman Daniel Boone first saw the forests and valleys of present-day Kentucky on this day in 1769)
~ National Turkey Lovers Month
~ National Rose Month
~ National Fresh Fruit and Vegetables Month
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BIRTHDAYS ON THIS DATE:

  •  1848 Paul Gaugin [Eugene Henri], French post-impressionist painter
  • 1909 Jessica Tandy, London, actress (Birds, Cocoon, Batteries Not Included, Driving Miss Daisy, Fried Green Tomatoes)
  • 1909 Virginia Apgar, Westfield, New Jersey, physician and childbirth specialist (APGAR score for newborns)
  • 1917 Dean Martin, Steubenville, Ohio, singer/comedian (partner for Jerry Lewis)
  • 1950 Gary Graham, Long Beach, California, actor (Det. Matt Sikes/Alien Nation; Ambassador Soval/ST Enterprise, Renegades)
  • 1952 Liam Neeson, Northern Irish actor (Schindler’s List, Star Wars Episode 1: The Phantom Menace, Batman Begins, Chronicles of Narnia, Excaliber, Rob Roy, Clash of the Titans, A-Team, The Grey, A Walk Among the Tombstones, Taken 1, 2 & 3, Silence)
  • 1954 Louise Erdrich, Little Falls, Minnesota, author Native American novels (Love Medicine, The Antelope Wife, Plague of Doves, The Round House, LaRose)
  • 1955 William Forsythe, Brooklyn, New York, actor (Gotti, Larva, The Rock, Outlaw, The Midnight Man, Checkpoint)
  • 1958 Prince [Rodgers Nelson], Minneapolis, Minnesota, rocker/actor (1999, Purple Rain, Planet Earth), (d. 2016)
  • 1969 Kim Rhodes, Portland, Oregon, actress (Another World, As The World Turns, Suite Life of Zach & Cody, Supernatural, Colony)
  • 1981 Larisa Oleynik, Santa Clara Co., California, actress (The Secret Life of Alex Mack, The Baby-sitters Club, 10 Things I Hate About You, Hawaii Five-O, Mad Men)

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Do not go where the path may lead.
Go instead where there is no path and leave a trail.
— Ralph Waldo Emerson
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HISTORICAL HAPPENINGS:

  • 1892 Benjamin Harrison becomes the first President of the United States to attend a baseball game.
  • 1942 World War II: The Battle of Midway ends.
  • 1965 Supreme Court of the US decides on Griswold v. Connecticut, effectively legalizing the use of contraception by married couples.
  • 1965 Gemini IV, with James McDivitt and Ed White, completed US’s first EVA and 62 orbits in 4 days, then splashed down in the ocean.
  • 1969 Bob Dylan & Johnny Cash combine on a Grand Ole Opry TV special.
  • 1975 Sony introduces the Betamax videocassette recorder for sale to the public.
  • 1977 500 million people watch on television as the high day of Jubilee gets underway for Queen Elizabeth II.
  • 1982 Priscilla Presley opens Graceland to the public; the bathroom where Elvis Presley died five years earlier is kept off-limits.
  • 1991 Mount Pinatubo explodes generating an ash column 7 km (4.5 miles) high.

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The airline had a policy that required the first officer to stand at the door while the passengers exited, smile, and give them a “Thanks for flying XYZ airline”.

An airline pilot on this particular flight hammered his plane into the runway really hard. In light of his bad landing, he had difficulty looking the passengers in the eye, all the time he thought that a passenger would have a smart comment. However, it seemed that all the passengers were too shell shocked to say anything.

Finally, everyone had gotten off except for this little old lady walking with a cane. She said, “Sonny, mind if I ask you a question?”

“Why no Ma’am,” said the pilot, “What is it?”

The little old lady said, “Did we land or were we shot down?”
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QUIZ:
[Answers below]

1. Johnny’s mother had three children. The first child was named April. The second child was named May. What was the third child’s name?

2. There is a clerk at the butcher shop, he is five feet ten inches tall and he wears size 13 sneakers. What does he weigh?

3. Before Mt. Everest was discovered, what was the highest mountain in the world?

4. How much dirt is there in a hole that measures two feet by three feet by four feet?

5. What word in the English language is always spelled incorrectly?

6. Billy was born on December 28th, yet his birthday is always in the summer. How is this possible?

7. In California, you cannot take a picture of a man with a wooden leg. Why not?

8. If you were running a race and you passed the person in 2nd place, what place would you be in now?

9. Which is correct to say, “The yolk of the egg are white” or “The yolk of the egg is white”?

10. If a farmer has 5 haystacks in one field and 4 haystacks in the other field, how many haystacks would he have if he combined them all in another field?

ANSWERS:

1. Johnny’s mother had three children. The first child was named April The second child was named May. What was the third child’s name?

Answer: Johnny of course

2. There is a clerk at the butcher shop, he is five feet ten inches tall, and he wears size 13 sneakers. What does he weigh?

Answer: Meat.

3. Before Mt. Everest was discovered, what was the highest mountain in the world?

Answer: Mt. Everest ; it just wasn’t discovered yet. [You’re not very good at this are you?]

4. How much dirt is there in a hole that measures two feet by three feet by four feet?

Answer: There is no dirt in a hole.

5. What word in the English language is always spelled incorrectly?

Answer: Incorrectly

6. Billy was born on December 28th, yet her birthday is always in the summer. How is this possible?

Answer: Billy lives in the Southern Hemisphere

7. In California, you cannot take a picture of a man with a wooden leg. Why not?

Answer: You can’t take pictures with a wooden leg. You need a camera to take pictures.

8. If you were running a race and you passed the person in 2nd place, what place would you be in now?

Answer: You would be in 2nd. Well, you passed the person in second place, not first.

9. Which is correct to say, “The yolk of the egg are white” or “The yolk of the egg is white”?

Answer: Neither, the yolk of the egg is yellow. [Duh]

10. If a farmer has 5 haystacks in one field and 4 haystacks in the other field, how many haystacks would he have if he combined them all in another field?

Answer: One. If he combines all of his haystacks, they all become one big stack.

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WARNING! ENTERING THE PUN ZONE!

After months of digging in Norway, the archeological team finally uncovered an ancient statue of Thor, god of thunder in Norse mythology. It was a magnificent sight, and there where Thor’s eyes would normally be, sat two giant rubies.

Well, both archeologists involved in the dig, of international renown, vowed that each would have their name associated with the finding of such giant gems. The argument turned ugly, and soon the two men were at each other, tooth and nail. The fight lasted for hours.

When the dust cleared, both archeologists were lying flat in the dirt, unconscious.
One worker turned to the other and said, “Well, that was a fight for Thor eyes.”
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Golden Oldie #1) Two goober football players were taking an exam to determine their athletic eligibility. The exam was fill-in-the-blank. The first question read, “Old MacDonald had a ________.”

Bubba was stumped. He had no idea what to answer. But he knew he needed to get this one right to pass. Making sure the professor wasn’t watching, he tapped Tiny on the shoulder. “Pssst. Tiny. What’s the answer to the first question?”

Tiny laughed. He looked around to make sure the professor hadn’t noticed. “Bubba, you’re so stupid. Everyone knows Old MacDonald had a FARM.”

“Oh yeah. I remember now.” Bubba picked up his No. 2 pencil and started to write the answer in the blank. He stopped. Tapping Tiny’s shoulder again, he whispered, “Tiny, how do you spell farm?”

“You are really dumb, Bubba. That’s so easy. Farm is spelled … E-I-E-I-O.”
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Golden Oldie #2) One dark night outside a small town in Minnesota, a fire started inside the local chemical plant and in the blink of an eye it exploded into massive flames. The alarm went out to all the fire departments for miles around.

When the volunteer fire fighters appeared on the scene, the chemical company president rushed to the fire chief and said, “All our secret formulas are in the vault in the center of the plant. They must be saved. I will give $50,000 to the fire department that brings them out intact.”

But the roaring flames held the firefighters off.

Soon more fire departments had to be called in as the situation became desperate. As the firemen arrived, the president shouted out that the offer was now $100,000 to the fire department who could bring out the company’s secret files.

From the distance, a lone siren was heard as another fire truck came into sight. It was the nearby Norwegian rural township volunteer fire company comprised mainly of Norwegians over the age of 65. To everyone’s amazement, that little run-down fire engine roared right past all the newer sleek engines that were parked outside the plant.

Without even slowing down it drove straight into the middle of the inferno. Outside, the other firemen watched in amazement as the Norwegian old timers jumped off right in the middle of the fire and bravely fought it back on all sides. It was a performance and effort never seen before.

Within a short time, the Norske old timers had extinguished the fire and had saved the secret formulas. The grateful chemical company president announced that for such a superhuman feat he was upping the reward to $200,000, and walked over to personally thank each of the brave fire fighters.

The local TV news reporter rushed in to capture the event on film, asking their chief, “What are you going to do with all that money?”

“Vell,” said Ole Larsen, the 70-year-old fire chief, “Da first thing ve gonna do is fix da brakes on dat old truck!”
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TODAY IN TRIVIA: How many beetles are there? There are more beetles on Earth than any other living creature. The number of species alone is nearly a quarter-million.

~How close is Japan to Hawaii? The distance from Honolulu to New York is greater than the distance from Honolulu to Japan.

~What was the world’s first singing commercial? The world’s first singing commercial aired on the radio on Christmas Eve, 1926 for Wheaties cereal. The four male singers, eventually known as the Wheaties Quartet, sang the jingle. The Wheaties Quartet, comprised of an undertaker, a bailiff, a printer, and a businessman, performed the song for the next six years, at $6 per singer per week. The commercials were a resounding success.
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QUIP OF THE DAY: Warning! Don’t wear headphones while vacuuming. I’ve just finished the whole house before realizing the vacuum wasn’t plugged in.

THAT’S (ALMOST) ALL FOLKS!

Thought for the day. . . Write it on your heart that every day is the best day in the year. No man has learned anything rightly, until he knows that every day is Doomsday. – Ralph Waldo Emerson

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