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May 1st

Attitude is a little thing that makes a big difference. – Winston Churchill


TODAY – MAY 1st

121st day of the year (122nd in leap years) with 244 days to follow.

HOLIDAYS for Today
~ Global Love Day
~ Hawaiian Lei Day (Hawaiian version of May Day)
~ Law Day
~ May Day (In many ancient calendars, May 1 was the first day of summer)
~ National Chocolate Parfait Day
~ National Loyalty Day (to reaffirm loyalty to the U.S. & recognition of the heritage of American freedom)
~ National Mother Goose Day
~ School Principals’ Day
~ Silver Star Service Banner Day (honors sacrifices of combat wounded, ill and dying service members)
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TODAY’S BIRTHDAYS:

  • 1852 Calamity Jane, Princeton, Missouri, frontierswoman and professional scout (known for being an acquaintance of Wild Bill Hickok’s)
  • 1855 Cecilia Beaux, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania, painter and academic (society portraitist)
  • 1864 Anna Jarvis, Webster, West Virginia, founder of Mother’s Day (social activist)
  • 1885 Ralph Stackpole, Williams, Oregon, sculptor and painter (San Francisco’s leading artist during the 1920s and 1930s)
  • 1901 Sterling Allen Brown, Washington D.C., poet, academic, and critic (1st Poet Laureate of the District of Columbia)
  • 1907 Kate Smith, Greenville, Virginia, singer and actress (The First Lady of Radio)
  • 1910 J. Allen Hynek, Chicago, Illinois, astronomer and ufologist (acted as scientific adviser to UFO studies undertaken by the U.S. Air Force )
  • 1916 Glenn Ford, Canadian-American actor and producer (Gilda (1946), The Big Heat (1953), Blackboard Jungle (1955), 3:10 to Yuma (1957) and Superman (1978))
  • 1918 Jack Paar, Canton, Ohio, comedian, author and talk show host (2nd host of The Tonight Show; 1957 to 1962)
  • 1923 Joseph Heller, Brooklyn, New York, novelist, short story writer, and playwright (Catch-22)
  • 1924 Evelyn Boyd Granville, Washington, D.C., mathematician, computer scientist (part of the team of scientists responsible for writing the computer programs that tracked the paths of vehicles in space on NASA’s Project Vanguard and Project Mercury)
  • 1924 Terry Southern, American novelist, essayist, and screenwriter (Dr. Strangelove (1964), Casino Royale (1967), Barbarella (1968), Easy Rider (1969))
  • 1925 Scott Carpenter, Boulder, Colorado, commander, pilot, and astronaut (Mercury Seven astronaut, second American to orbit the Earth and the 4th American in space)
  • 1934 Shirley Horn, Washington, D.C., jazz singer and pianist (nominated for 9 Grammy Awards, winning the Grammy Award for Best Jazz Vocal Performance at the 41st Grammy Awards for I Remember Miles)
  • 1939 Judy Collins, Seattle, Washington, singer-songwriter and guitarist (Both Sides Now, Send in the Clowns)
  • 1967 Tim McGraw, Start, Louisiana, singer-songwriter and actor (Not a Moment Too Soon (1994), All I Want (1995), A Place in the Sun (1999), Set This Circus Down (2001), Live Like You Were Dying (2004), Sundown Heaven Town (2014), The Rest of Our Life (with Faith Hill) (2017))
  • 2004 Charli D’Amelio, Norwalk, Connecticut, social media influencer and dancer (over 50.1 million followers on the social video sharing app TikTok, and has been called the “reigning queen of TikTok”)

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If you don’t design your own life plan, chances are you’ll fall into someone else’s plan. And guess what they have planned for you? Not much. – Jim Rohn
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TODAY IN HISTORY:

  • 1753 Publication of Species Plantarum by Linnaeus, and the formal start date of plant taxonomy adopted by the International Code of Botanical Nomenclature.
  • 1866 The Memphis Race Riots begin. In three days time, 46 blacks and two whites were killed. Reports of the atrocities influenced passage of the Fourteenth Amendment to the United States Constitution.
  • 1884 Moses Fleetwood Walker becomes the first black person to play in a professional baseball game in the United States.
  • 1886 Rallies are held throughout the United States demanding the eight-hour work day, culminating in the Haymarket affair in Chicago, in commemoration of which May 1 is celebrated as International Workers’ Day in many countries.
  • 1894 Coxey’s Army, the first significant American protest march, arrives in Washington, D.C.
  • 1900 The Scofield Mine disaster kills over 200 men in Scofield, Utah in what is to date the fifth-worst mining accident in United States history.
  • 1915 The RMS Lusitania departs from New York City on her 202nd, and final, crossing of the North Atlantic. Six days later, the ship is torpedoed off the coast of Ireland with the loss of 1,198 lives.
  • 1931 The Empire State Building is dedicated in New York City.
  • 1956 The polio vaccine developed by Jonas Salk is made available to the public.
  • 1960 Cold War: U-2 incident: Francis Gary Powers, in a Lockheed U-2 spyplane, is shot down over the Sverdlovsk Oblast, Soviet Union, sparking a diplomatic crisis.
  • 1961 The Prime Minister of Cuba, Fidel Castro, proclaims Cuba a socialist nation and abolishes elections.
  • 1967 Elvis Presley and Priscilla Beaulieu are married in Las Vegas.
  • 1971 Amtrak (the National Railroad Passenger Corporation) takes over operation of U.S. passenger rail service.
  • 1989 Disney-MGM Studios opens at Walt Disney World near Orlando, Florida, United States.
  • 1999 SpongeBob SquarePants premieres on Nickelodeon.
  • 2003 Invasion of Iraq: In what becomes known as the “Mission Accomplished” speech, on board the USS Abraham Lincoln (off the coast of California), U.S. President George W. Bush declares that “major combat operations in Iraq have ended”.

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We were four frugal young teachers. But a couple times a year we treated ourselves to the best Manhattan had to offer. As we approached the famous restaurant Lutece, we questioned whether we were dressed perfectly. Could we pass as urban sophisticates?

The maitre d’ met us at the door, all smiles and bows. When he took my raincoat, I began to look over the cozy little bar and anticipate the charming basket of pastry that was our appetizer. Then the maitre d’ returned to our group, gingerly holding a fabric softener sheet that had fallen from my coat sleeve.

“Madam,” he said, “Your Bounce.”

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There was a man driving down the road behind an 18 wheeler, at every stoplight the trucker would get out of the cab, run back and bang on the trailer door. After seeing this at several intersections in a row the motorist followed him until he pulled into a parking lot.

When they both had come to a stop the truck driver once again jumped out and started banging on the trailer door. The motorist went up to him and said, “I don’t mean to be nosey but why do you keep banging on that door?”

To which the trucker replied, “Sorry, can’t talk now, I have 20 tons of canaries and a 10 ton limit, so I have to keep half of them flying at all times.”

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ONE-LINERS: What do they wear to work?

~ A lawyer wears a suit.
~ A judge wears briefs.
~ An electrician wears shorts.

~ A psychiatrist wears a slip.
~ A painter wears a coat.
~ A golfer wears a tee-shirt.

~ A tree surgeon wears trunks.
~ A fireman wears pumps.
~ A pugilist wears boxers. And socks.

~ A politician wears a skirt.
~ A biologist wears jeans.
~ A bartender wears glasses.
~ Earl Gray wears a T shirt.
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NASA decided to send a shuttle into space with two monkeys and an astronaut. They trained them for months. Then when they thought they were ready, they placed all three in the shuttle and got ready to send them up into space.

As the moment came closer NASA’s mission control center announced, “This is mission control to Monkey One. Initiate!”

At that the first monkey started typing like mad and suddenly the shuttle’s engines ignited and the shuttle took off.

Two hours later NASA’s mission control center announced, “This is mission control to Monkey Two. Initiate!”

At that the second monkey started typing like mad and suddenly the shuttle separated from the empty fuel tanks.

Another two hours later mission control announced, “This is mission control to the astronaut…”

At this the astronaut responded “I know, I know. Feed the monkeys and don’t touch anything.”
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My family physician told me of an incident that actually happened to him back in the early days of his practice. He said a woman brought her baby to see him, and he determined right away that the baby had an earache. He wrote a prescription for ear drops. In the directions he wrote, “Put two drops in right ear every four hours” abbreviating “right” as an R with a circle around it.

Several days passed, and the woman returned with her baby, complaining that the baby still had an earache, and his little behind was getting really greasy with all those drops of oil.

The doctor looked at the bottle of ear drops and sure enough, the pharmacist had typed the instructions on the label as: “Put two drops in R ear every four hours.”

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PIC OF THE DAY: Opossum Mama and Babies
possum and babies
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CORONAVIRUS PLAYLIST
By Bob Grinsell

Nothing helps relieve stress like listening to some relaxing music. To help take your mind off the current situation, we offer this helpful playlist. Listen and enjoy!

~ Stayin’ Alive, Bee Gees
~ Take My Breath Away, Berlin
~ Somebody that I Used to Know, Gotye & Kimba

~ Toxic, Britney Spears
~ So Far Away From Me, Dire Straits
~ Don’t Stand so Close to Me, The Police

~ Every Breath You Take, The Police
~ The Air that I Breathe, The Hollies
~ Alone Again (Naturally), Gilbert O’Sullivan

~ Fever, Peggy Lee
~ Can’t Feel My Face, The Weekend
~ End of the World as We Know It, REM

~ Gimme Shelter, Rolling Stones
~ Dancing with Myself, Billy Idol
~ In the Air Tonight, Phil Collins

~ The Cure, Lady Gaga
~ Too Much Time on My Hands, Styx
~ Keep Your Hands to Yourself, Georgia Satellites

~ All By Myself, Eric Carmen
~ Can’t Touch This, MC Hammer
~ I Will Survive, Gloria Gaynor

~ In My Room, Beach Boys
~ Go Your Own Way, Fleetwood Mac
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The head nun tells the two new nuns that they have to paint their room without getting any paint on their clothes.
The one nun says to the other, “Hey, let’s take all our clothes off, fold them up, and lock the door.”

So they do this, and begin painting their room.
Soon they hear a knock at the door. They ask, “Who is it?”
“Blind man!”

The nuns look at each other, then one nun says, “He’s blind, he can’t see. What could it hurt.” They let him in.
The man walks in, does a double take, and says, “Where do you want me to hang the blinds?”
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WARNING! ENTERING THE PUN ZONE!

~ A good pun is its own reword.
~ Energizer Bunny arrested; charged with battery.
~ A pessimist’s blood type is always b-negative.

~ Dijon vu: The same mustard as before.
~ Corduroy pillows are making headlines.
~ Does the name Pavlov ring a bell?

~ A gossip is someone with a great sense of rumor.
~ When two egotists meet, it’s an I for an I.
~ A chicken crossing the road is poultry in motion.

~ Show me a piano falling down a mineshaft and I’ll show you A-flat minor.
~ The short fortuneteller who escaped from prison was a small medium at large.
~ Acupuncture is a jab well done.
~ I tried working in a muffler factory, but that was too exhausting.
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Four-year-old Mitch loved candy almost as much as his mom Ann did. He and Daddy had given her a beautiful heart-shaped box of chocolates for Valentine’s Day. A few days later Mitch was eyeing it, wishing to have a piece of it. As he reached out to touch one of the big pieces, Ann said to him, “If you touch it, then you have to eat it. Do you understand?”

“Oh, yes,” he said, nodding his head. Suddenly his little hand patted the tops of all the pieces of candy. “Now I can eat them all.”
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My Parents had not been out together in quite some time.
One Saturday, as Mom was finishing the dinner dishes, my father stepped up behind her.
“Would you like to go out, girl?” he asked.

Not even turning around, my mother quickly replied, “Oh, yes, I’d love to!”
They had a wonderful evening, and it wasn’t until the end of it that Dad confessed.
His question had actually been directed to the family dog, lying near Mom’s feet on the kitchen floor.
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A farmer and his recently hired hand were eating an early breakfast of biscuits and gravy, scrambled eggs, bacon and coffee that the farmer’s wife had prepared for them. Thinking of all the work they had to get done that day, the farmer told the hired man he might as well go ahead and eat his lunch too.

The hired man didn’t say a word, but filled his plate a second time and proceeded to eat. After awhile the farmer said, “We’ve got so much work to do today, you might as well eat your supper now too.”

Again, the hired man didn’t respond but refilled his plate a third time and continued to eat. Finally, after eating his third plate of food, the hired man pushed back his chair and began to take off his shoes.

“What are you doing”? the farmer asked.
The hired man replied, “I don’t work after supper.”
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A man goes into a dentist’s office.
Man: “Excuse me, can you help me? I think I’m a moth.”

Dentist: “You don’t need a dentist. You need a psychiatrist.”
Man: “Yes, I know.”

Dentist: “So, why did you come in here?”
Man: “The light was on.”

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TODAY IN TRIVIA: How did Klaatu’s spaceship door remain invisible? The spaceship in the sci-fi classic The Day the Earth Stood Still (1951) was 25 feet high and was built on a studio backlot. It had to show no visible openings or hatches, yet had to open at certain times. The film’s art directors incorporated an invisible split in its sides that was sealed over with soft plastic and coated with silver paint. Every time the dome of the ship was opened or closed, film crew members had to reseal the split. It was an innovative design for the era.

~ Which Great White was the largest ever caught? The largest Great White Shark ever caught measured 37 feet and weighed 24,000 pounds. It was found in a herring weir in New Brunswick in 1930. The harmless Whale Shark, holds the title of largest fish, with the record being a 59-footer captured in Thailand in 1919.

~ When did macaroni manufacturing begin in the U.S? The first macaroni factory in the United States was established in 1848. It was started by Antoine Zegera in Brooklyn, New York.
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QUIP OF THE DAY: Get your facts first, then you can distort them as you please – Mark Twain

THAT’S (ALMOST) ALL FOLKS!

Thought for the day. . . “Don’t flatter yourself that friendship authorizes you to say disagreeable things to your intimates. The nearer you come into relation with a person, the more necessary do tact and courtesy become. Except in cases of necessity, which are rare, leave your friend to learn unpleasant things from his enemies; they are ready enough to tell them.” – Oliver Wendell Holmes

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