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November 12th

Character contributes to beauty. It fortifies a woman as her youth fades. A mode of conduct, a standard of courage, discipline, fortitude, and integrity can do a great deal to make a woman beautiful. – Jacqueline Bisset


316th day of the year (317th in leap years) with 49 days to follow.

Holidays for Today:

~ National Chicken Soup for the Soul Day
~ National French Dip Day
~ National Pizza with the Works Except Anchovies Day
~ Fancy Rat & Mouse Day
~ World Pneumonia Day


  • 1815 Elizabeth Cady Stanton, Johnstown, New York, suffragette (Declaration of Statements)
  • 1840 Auguste Rodin, French sculptor (progenitor of modern sculpture, The Thinker)
  • 1889 DeWitt Wallace, St. Paul, Minnesota, publisher (co-founded Reader’s Digest)
  • 1922 Kim Hunter, Detroit, Michigan, actress (A Streetcar Named Desire, Planet of the Apes, The Edge of Night)
  • 1929 Grace Kelly, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania, actress (High Noon, Dial M for Murder, To Catch a Thief) and Princess consort of Monaco
  • 1937 Richard H. Truly, Fayette, Mississippi, pilot, retired Vice Admiral in U.S. Navy, and former astronaut (ALT, STS-2, STS-8)
  • 1945 Neil Young, Toronto, Ontario, singer and guitarist (Buffalo Springfield, Crosby, Stills, Nash & Young)
  • 1962 Neal Shusterman, Brooklyn, New York, author (Dark Fusion, Darkness Creeping, Skinjacker Trilogy, Star Shards series; Downsiders, Full Tilt, Challenger Deep)
  • 1963 Sam Lloyd, Weston, Vermont, actor (Flubber, Galaxy Quest, Spelling Bee, The Brother Solomon, Scrubs, The Pet Squad Files)
  • 1968 Sammy Sosa, Dominican baseball player (609 career home runs)
  • 1974 Tamala Jones, Pasadena, California, actress (Booty Call, The Wood, Kingdom Come, The Brothers, Castle)
  • 1976 Richelle Mead, Michigan, author (Georgina Kincaid series, Vampire Academy, Dark Swan series, The Ruby Circle)
  • 1980 Ryan Gosling, Canadian-American actor (Breaker High, Young Hercules, The Notebook, Half Nelson, The Nice Guys)
  • 1982 Anne Hathaway, Brooklyn, New York, actress (Get Real, The Princess Diaries, Havoc, Brokeback Mountain, The Devil Wears Prada, Becoming Jane, Interstellar)


Because of your smile, you make life more beautiful. – Thich Nhat Hanh


  • 1439 Plymouth, England, becomes the first town incorporated by the English Parliament.
  • 1602  Sebastian Viscaino lands at and names San Diego, California.
  • 1892 The first professional American football player on record, William “Pudge” Heffelfinger, participated in his first paid game for the Allegheny Athletic Association.
  • 1912 Robert Scott and his men’s frozen bodies are found on the Ross Ice Shelf in Antarctica.
  • 1927 Leon Trotsky is expelled from the Soviet Communist Party, leaving Joseph Stalin in undisputed control of the Soviet Union.
  • 1928 SS Vestris sinks approximately 200 miles (320 km) off Hampton Roads, Virginia, killing at least 110 passengers, mostly women and children who die after the vessel is abandoned.
  • 1933 First known photos of the Loch Ness Monster are taken by Hugh Gray.
  • 1942 World War II: The Naval Battle of Guadalcanal between Japanese and American forces begins near Guadalcanal. The battle lasts for three days.
  • 1958 A team of rock climbers led by Warren Harding completes the first ascent of The Nose on El Capitan in Yosemite Valley.
  • 1971 Vietnam War: US President Richard M. Nixon sets February 1, 1972 as the deadline for the removal of another 45,000 American troops from Vietnam.
  • 1980 The NASA space probe Voyager I makes its closest approach to Saturn and takes the first images of its rings.
  • 1981 With mission STS-2, the Space Shuttle Columbia became the first manned spacecraft launched into space twice.
  • 1990 A formal proposal for the World Wide Web is published by Tim Bemers-Lee.
  • 1997 Ramzi Yousef is found guilty of masterminding the 1993 World Trade Center bombing.
  • 2001 In New York City, American Airlines Flight 587, an Airbus A300 en route to the Dominican Republic, crashes minutes after takeoff from John F. Kennedy International Airport, killing all 260 on board and five on the ground.
  • 2003 Shanghai Transrapid sets a new world speed record (501 kilometres per hour (311 mph)) for commercial railway systems, which remains the fastest for unmodified commercial rail vehicles.


GOLDEN OLDIE… Sally was driving home from one of her business trips in northern Arizona when she saw an elderly Navajo woman walking on the side of the road. As the trip was a long and quiet one, she stopped the car and asked the Navajo woman if she would like a ride.

After a bit of small talk while resuming the journey, the Navajo woman noticed a brown bag on the seat next to Sally.

“What’s in the bag?” asked the woman.

Sally looked down at the brown bag and said, “It’s a bottle of wine. I got it for my husband.”

The Navajo woman was silent for a moment then speaking with the quiet wisdom of an elder said, “Good trade.”


One night at an economy motel, I ordered a 6 a.m. wake-up call. The next morning, I awoke before 6, but the phone did not ring until 6:30.

“Good morning,” a young man said sheepishly. “This is your wake-up call.” Annoyed, I let the hotel worker have it. “You were supposed to call me at 6!,” I complained. “What if I had a million-dollar deal to close this morning, and your oversight made me miss out on it?”

“Well, sir,” the desk clerk quickly replied, “if you had a million-dollar deal to close, you wouldn’t be staying in this motel!”


ONE-LINERS: 7 Reasons Dogs don’t Use Computers

~ Three words: Carpal Paw Syndrome.
~ Can’t stick their heads out of Windows 10

~ Too difficult to “mark” every Web site they visit.
~ Saliva-coated mouse gets mighty difficult to maneuver.

~ Too hard to read the screen with head cocked to one side.
~ Can’t help attacking the screen when they hear “You’ve Got Mail!”

~ ‘Cause dogs aren’t GEEKS!

The little old lady seated herself right behind the bus driver. Every ten minutes or so she’d pipe up, “Have we reached Oriskany Falls yet, sonny?”
“No, lady, not yet. I’ll let you know,” he replied, time after time.

The hours passed, the old woman kept asking for Oriskany Falls, and finally the little town came into view. Sighing with relief, the driver slammed on the brakes, pulled over and called out, “This is where you get out, lady.”

“Is this Oriskany Falls?”
“YES!” he bellowed. “Get out!”

“Oh, I’m going all the way to Albany, sonny,” she explained sweetly. “It’s just that my daughter told me that when we got this far, I should take my blood pressure pill.”

When the new patient was settled comfortably on the couch, the psychiatrist began his therapy session.

“I’m not aware of your problem,” the doctor said. “So perhaps, you should start at the very beginning.”

“Of course.” replied the patient. “In the beginning, I created the Heavens and the Earth…”


pic of the day: Cardinal in Snow

red bird on branch

Moe: “I just bought a new hearing aid. It cost me four thousand dollars, but it’s state of the art. It’s perfect!”

Joe: “Really? What kind is it?”
Moe: “Twelve-thirty.”

A young man who was also an avid golfer found himself with a few hours to spare one afternoon. He figured if he hurried and played very fast, he could get in 9 holes before he had to head home.

Just as he was about to tee off an old gentleman shuffled onto the tee and asked if he could accompany the young man as he was golfing alone.

Not being able to say no, he allowed the old gent to join him.

To his surprise the old man played fairly quickly. He didn’t hit the ball far but plodded along consistently and didn’t waste much time.

They reached the ninth fairway, and the young man found himself with a tough shot. There was a large pine tree right in front of his ball, directly between his ball and the green.

After several minutes of debating how to hit the shot the old man finally said, “You know, when I was your age I’d hit the ball right over that tree.”

With that challenge placed before him, the youngster swung hard and hit the ball right smack into the top of the tree trunk, where it thudded back on the ground not a foot from where it had originally been.

The old man offered one more comment, “Of course, when I was your age that pine tree was only 3 feet tall.”


A daring vacationer in Vienna is walking through a graveyard on Halloween when all of a sudden she hears music. No one is around, so she starts looking to see where it’s coming from. She finally locates the source and finds it is coming from a grave with a headstone that reads, “Ludwig van Beethoven.” Then she realizes that the music is the Ninth Symphony and it is being played backward.

Puzzled, she leaves the graveyard and persuades a friend to return with her. By the time they arrive back at the grave, the music has changed. This time it is the Seventh Symphony, but it is also being played backward.

Curious, the ladies agree to consult a music scholar. When they return with the expert, the Fifth Symphony is playing and the expert concludes that the symphonies are in fact being played in reverse order.

By the next day the word spread and a huge group gathered around the grave to hear the Second Symphony being played backward. Just then the graveyard’s caretaker approaches the group.

Someone in the crowd asks him if he has an explanation for the music.

“Oh, it’s nothing to worry about,” says the caretaker. “He’s just decomposing.”

During one “generation gap” quarrel with his parents, young Michael cried, “I want excitement, adventure, money, and beautiful women. I’ll never find it here at home, so I’m leaving. Don’t try to stop me!”
With that, he headed toward the door. His father rose and followed close behind.

“Didn’t you hear what I said? I don’t want you to try to stop me.”
“Who’s trying to stop you?” replied his father. “If you wait a minute, I’ll go with you.”

Useful Work Phrases

– I’m already visualizing the duct tape over your mouth.
– It’s a thankless job, but I’ve got a lot of karma to burn off.
– I will always cherish the initial misconceptions I had about you.

– No, my powers can only be used for good.
– How about never? Is never good for you?
– Yes, I am an agent of Satan, but my duties are largely ceremonial.

– You sound reasonable…Time to up my medication.
– I’ll try being nicer if you’ll try being smarter.
– I’m really easy to get along with once you people learn to worship me.

A lawyer phoned the governor’s mansion shortly after midnight. “I need to talk to the governor — it’s an emergency!” exclaimed the lawyer.

After some cajoling, the governor’s assistant agreed to wake him up.
“So, what is it that’s so important that it can’t wait until morning?” grumbled the governor.

“Judge Pierson just died, and I want to take his place,” begged the attorney.
“Well, it’s okay with me if it’s okay with the funeral home.”

During a recent hot spell in Atlanta, a bum collapsed on the street. Immediately a crowd gathered and began offering suggestions.

“Give the poor man a drink of whiskey,” a little old lady said.
“Give him some air,” a man cried out.

“Give him some whiskey,” she cried again.
“Give him some water,” another man said.

“Give him some whiskey,” the old lady said yet again.
Several other suggestions were made, and the bum suddenly sat up and hollered, “Will all of you shut up and listen to the little old lady?”


~ The idea of flat bread found its way to Italy where, in the 18th century, the flat breads called “Pizzas”, were sold on the streets and in the markets.

~ In 1889  Queen Margherita, accompanied by her husband, Umberto I, took an inspection tour of her Italian Kingdom. During her travels around Italy she saw many people, especially the peasants, eating this large, flat bread. Curious, she ordered her guards to bring her one of these Pizza breads and ate one every time she was out amongst the people, which caused some consternation in Court circles.

~ There are approximately 61,269 pizzerias in the United States. And there are over 9,000 pizzeria’s in New York alone.

~ 94% of the population of the U.S. eats pizza.
~ October is National Pizza Month. It was first so designated in 1987.
~ Americans eat approximately 100 acres of pizza EACH DAY, or about 350 slices per second.

~ Pepperoni is America’s favorite topping,
~ Anchovies are Americans’ least favorite topping.
~ Saturday night is the biggest night of the week for eating pizza.

~In the Netherlands, the “Double Dutch” is a favorite pizza recipe: double cheese, double onions, and double beef. (Source: Domino’s)

QUIP OF THE DAY: Television has proved that people will look at anything rather than each other. – Ann Landers


Thought for the day. . . When I stand before God at the end of my life, I would hope that I would not have a single bit of talent left and could say, I used everything you gave me. – Erma Bombeck

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