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November 14th

“Success is not final, failure is not fatal: it is the courage to continue that counts.” ― Winston Churchill


TODAY – NOVEMBER 14th

318th day of the year (319th in leap years) with 47 days to follow.

Holidays for Today:
~ Loosen Up, Lighten Up Day
~ National American Teddy Bear Day
~ National Pickle Day
~ Operating Room Nurse Day
~ Spirit of NSA (national day of advocacy for the National Speakers Association)
~ World Diabetes Day
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Far and away the best prize that life has to offer is the chance to work hard at work worth doing. – Theodore Roosevelt
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BIRTHDAYS ON THIS DATE:

  • 1765 Robert Fulton, Lancaster County, Pennsylvania, inventor (widely credited with developing the first commercially successful steamboat)
  • 1840 Claude Monet, French painter (founder of French impressionist painting / Sunrise, On the Bank of the Seine, Water Lilies)
  • 1863 Leo Hendrik Baekeland, Belgium, Flemish-American chemist and inventor (first synthetic plastic, Bakelite)
  • 1896 Mamie Eisenhower, Boone, Iowa, First Lady of the United States (1953-1961; wife of President Dwight Eisenhower)
  • 1907 William Steig, Brooklyn, New York, children’s book author (Abel’s Island, Doctor De Soto, created Shrek character)
  • 1927 McLean Stevenson, Normal, Illinois, actor (Lt. Colonel Henry Blake on M*A*S*H, The Doris Day Show, guest host for The Tonight Show Starring Johnny Carson 58 times)
  • 1930 Edward Higgins White, San Antonio, Texas, astronaut / engineer / USAF officer (first American to walk in space on 6/3/1965; Gemini 4, Apollo 1)
  • 1948 Charles, Prince of Wales
  • 1962 Laura San Giacomo, West Orange, New Jersey, actress (Pretty Woman, Quigley Down Under, The Stand, Just Shoot Me, Saving Grace, NCIS)
  • 1964 Patrick Warburton, Paterson, New Jersey, actor (Dave’s World, Seinfield, The Emperor’s New Groove, Buzz Lightyear of Star Command, Kim Possible, Less Than Perfect, The Venture Bros., Rules of Engagement)
  • 1976 Betsy Brandt, Bay City, Michigan, actress (Breaking Bad, The Michael J. Fox Show, Life in Pieces)
  • 1980 Brock Pierce, Minnesota, actor (The Mighty Ducks, First Kid) and entrepreneur Founded Internet Gaming Entertainment, Zam, and Director of the Bitcon Foundation)

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The trouble with most of us is that we would rather be ruined by praise than saved by criticism. – Norman Vincent Peale
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HISTORICAL HAPPENINGS:

  • 1862 During the American Civil War, President Abraham Lincoln approves General Ambrose Burnside’s plan to capture the Confederate capital at Richmond, Virginia, leading to the Battle of Fredericksburg.
  • 1889 Pioneering female journalist Nellie Bly (aka Elizabeth Cochrane) begins a successful attempt to travel around the world in less than 80 days, completing the trip in only 72 days.
  • 1910 Aviator Eugene Burton Ely performs the first take off from a ship in Hampton Roads, Virginia. He took off from a makeshift deck on the USS Birmingham in a Curtiss pusher.
  • 1967 American physicist Theodore Maiman is given a patent for his ruby laser systems, the world’s first laser.
  • 1969 NASA launches Apollo 12, the second manned mission to the surface of the Moon.
  • 1971 Mariner 9 enters orbit around Mars.
  • 1973 In the United Kingdom, Princess Anne marries Captain Mark Phillips, in Westminster Abbey.
  • 1991 In Royal Oak, Michigan, a fired United States Postal Service employee goes on a shooting rampage, killing four and wounding five before committing suicide.
  • 2007 The last direct-current electrical distribution system in the United States is shut down in New York City by Con Edison.
  • 2008 First G-20 economic summit opens in Washington, D.C.
  • 2016 A magnitude 7.5 earthquake strikes New Zealand at 12.02 am NZDT, followed by a considerable number of aftershocks. The epicenter was 15 km north-east of Culverden, North Canterbury.

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My six-year-old grandson called his mother from his friend Charlie’s house and confessed he had broken a lamp when he threw a football in their living room.
“But, Mom,” he said, brightening, “you don’t have to worry about buying another one. Charlie’s mom said it was irreplaceable!”
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“Try not to become a man of success. Rather become a man of value.” ― Albert Einstein
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NASA recently published a new photograph of distant galaxies colliding.
Of course, astronomers have had pictures of colliding galaxies for quite some time now, but with the vastly improved resolution provided by the Hubble Space Telescope, you can actually see the lawyers rushing to the scene.
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A police officer arrives at the scene of an accident, in which a car smashed into a tree.
The cop rushes over to the vehicle and asks the driver, “Are you seriously hurt?”
“How should I know?” the man answers, “I’m not a lawyer!”
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ONE-LINERS: Your Starship Captain Might Be a Redneck If…

~ You have a shuttle called “Billy Joe Bob”.
~ He paints flames and a NRA sticker on the warp nacelles.
~ Your shuttlecraft has been up on blocks for over a month.

~ He refers to Klingons as “Critters”.
~ He refers to Photon Torpedoes as “Popguns”.
~ He has the sensor array repaired with a bent coathanger and aluminum foil.

~ He hangs fuzzy dice over the viewscreen.
~ He installs a set of bullhorns on the front of the saucer section.
~ He says “Got your ears on, good buddy” instead of “open hailing frequencies”.

~ He says “Yee-Ha!” instead of “Engage”.
~ He rewires his communicator into his belt buckle.
~ He keeps a six-pack under his command chair and a gun rack above it.

~ He has a hand-tooled holster for his phaser.
~ He insists on calling his executive officer “Bubba”.
~ He sets the fore viewscreen to reruns of “Bassmaster”.

~ He paints the starship John Deere green.
~ He refers to a Pulsar as a “Blue Light Special”.
~ He programs the food replicator for beer, ribs, and turnip greens.

~ He sings “Lucille” instead of “Kathleen”.
~ His moonshine is stronger than Romulan Ale.
~ He refers to the Mutara Nebula as a “swamp”.

~ He wears mirrored shades on the Bridge.
~ His idea of dress uniform is CLEAN bib overalls.
~ His idea of a “gas giant” is that big ol’ XO Bubba after a meal of beans and weenies.
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I’ve been to a lot of places but I’ve never been in Cahoots. Apparently you can’t go alone; you have to be in Cahoots with someone.
I’ve never been in Cognito either. I hear no one recognizes you there.
I have, however, been in Sane. They don’t have an airport. You have to be driven there. I’ve made several trips.
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“It had long since come to my attention that people of accomplishment rarely sat back and let things happen to them. They went out and happened to things.” ― Leonardo da Vinci
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The cartoon that helped originate the teddy bear:
Roosevelt teddy bear cartoon
Teddy bears are named after President Theodore Roosevelt. Why?

Well although he was a passionate hunter, Roosevelt did not hunt just for the sake of killing, and was against senseless slaughter of animals. During one long, unproductive bear hunt in Mississippi, his guide tracked a bear and tied it to a tree so that the president could at least say he shot something. But Roosevelt refused to shoot the injured old bear, a scene that political cartoonist Clifford Berryman famously illustrated (above).

After the cartoon appeared, a shopkeeper decided to call his toy bears “Teddy’s Bears,” and one of the most popular toys in the history of this nation was born.
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A preacher was made aware that he had a deacon in his church who was from time to time known to cuss.
In his attempt to help the deacon overcome this terrible habit, the preacher decided he should spend some personal time with the deacon so they could have a long talk about the problem. The preacher decided to ask the deacon to go fishing thinking that might provide an opportunity to talk.

They were out in a boat and had their lines in the water when the preacher hooked a BIG one. It put up a mighty fight, but finally he reeled the fish up to the edge of the boat. It was the biggest fish the preacher had ever caught. But, just as the minister started to pull his catch into the boat, the fish slipped off the hook and got away.
Thoroughly disgusted, the preacher looked over and said, “Deacon, somethin’ needs to be said here!”
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WARNING! ENTERING THE PUN ZONE!

Earlier this year Winston lost his ear. Luck would have it that it was replaced, with a pigs ear, by doctors. They cut it to size and made it look more human before sewing it, invisibly, in place.
Several weeks passed before Winston felt it necessary to return to his surgeons.

When he did, Winston complained bitterly, “Doctor, I keep hearing this noise and its doing my head in.”

The doctor, totally unconcerned answered, “Don’t worry, its just a bit of crackling.”
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The factory of the future will have two employees, a man and a dog.
The man will be there to feed the dog, and the dog is there to keep the man from touching the computers.
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A young boy called the pastor of a local church and asked him to come by to pray for his mother, who was very ill with the flu. The pastor knew the family and was aware they were members of another church down the road. So the pastor asked, “Shouldn’t you be asking Brother Simon at your church to come by to pray with your mom?”

The young boy replied, “Yeah, but we didn’t want to take the chance that he might catch whatever it is that Mom has.”
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Judge to prospective jury panel: “Does anyone in this room need to be dismissed from jury duty?”
A man stood up. “I’d like to be dismissed.”
“And why is that?”

“My ex-wife is also on the panel, and we never agree on anything.”
The judge dismissed them both.
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When I was invited to dinner with friends I took along a few pictures to show the hostess. She looked at the photos and commented, “These are very good! You must have a really good camera.”

I didn’t say anything but as I was leaving to go home I said, “That was a delicious meal! You must have some really good pots.”
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A man went on a ski trip, and was knocked unconscious by the chair lift. He called his insurance company from the hospital, but it refused to cover his injury.

“Why is the injury not covered?” he asked.
“You got hit in the head by a chair lift,” the insurance rep said. “That makes you an idiot, and we consider that a pre-existing condition.”
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TODAY IN TRIVIA: How much salt winds up on roadways? Each year, 9 million tons of salt, more than 10 percent of all the salt produced in the world, is applied to American highways for road de-icing. The cost of buying and applying the salt adds up to $200 million.

~ Why does a gibbon sing? Gibbons live in family groups and communicate to others through high-pitched songs which can be heard for several miles. Songs are specific to each family and convey information such as location, temper, and social position

~ How long will tea keep? Tea may be kept for up to 18 months in an airtight container, preferably metallic. Chinese teas will keep for up to 3 years.

~ Is Black Friday a holiday? Though not a federal holiday, some states have begun observing “The Day after Thanksgiving” as one so that state government employees can take advantage of Black Friday promotions. This is done in lieu of another holiday, such as Columbus Day.
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QUIP OF THE DAY: “If we knew what it was we were doing, it would not be called research, would it?” – Albert Einstein

THAT’S (ALMOST) ALL FOLKS!

Thought for the day. . . “Everyone discusses my art and pretends to understand, as if it were necessary to understand, when it is simply necessary to love.” – Claude Monet (Corollary: We don’t have to understand people, we just have to love them.)

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