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November 15th

“Remember, Hope is a good thing, maybe the best of things, and no good thing ever dies.” ― Stephen King

TODAY – NOVEMBER 15th

319th day of the year (320th in leap years) with 46 days to follow.

Holidays for Today:
~ America Recycles Day
~ Clean Your Refrigerator Day
~ I Love to Write Day
~ International Day of the Imprisoned Writer
~ National Bundt (Pan) Day
~ National Clean Out Your Refrigerator Day
~ National Philanthropy Day
~ National Raisin Bran Cereal Day
~ Rock Your Mocs Day
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BIRTHDAYS ON THIS DATE:

  • 1738 William Herschel, German-born British composer (24 symphonies) and astronomer (Discovered Uranus and 2 of its moons, Titania & Oberon, plus 2 moons of Saturn. Also, discovered existence of infrared radiation.)
  • 1887 Georgia O’Keeffe, Sun Prairie, Wisconsin, painter (Cow’s Skull; chiefly painted rocks, shells, animal bones, flowers, abstract landscapes)
  • 1887 Marianne Moore, Kirkwood, Missouri, poet (The Selected Letters of Marianne Moore; Pulitzer 1951)
  • 1905 Mantovani, Venice Italy, orchestra leader/composer (Mantovani)
  • 1919 Joseph Albert Wapner, Los Angeles, California, former judge (People’s Court)
  • 1929 Edward Asner, Kansas City, Kansas, actor (Mary Tyler Moore Show, Lou Grant; Carl Fredricksen in Pixar film “Up“)
  • 1940 Sam Waterston, Cambridge, Maine, actor (The Killing Fields, I’ll Fly Away, Law & Order & SVU, The Newsroom, Grace and Frankie)
  • 1963 Kevin J. O’Connor, Chicago, Illinois actor (Steel Magnolias, Deep Rising, The Mummy, Van Helsing, Seraphim Falls, Chicago P.D., Catch-22)
  • 1966 Rachel True, New York City, New York, actress (Killing of Wendy, Pink Eye, Sharknado, The Manor)
  • 1973 Sydney Tamiia Poitier, Los Angeles, California, actress (Grindhouse, Knight Rider (2008 film), Carter, Homecoming)
  • 1977 Peter Mark Andrew Phillips, grandson Queen Elizabeth II (father: Mark Phillips, former Captain in the Queen’s Dragoon Guards. mother: The Princess Anne, Princess Royal, the only daughter of Queen Elizabeth II and Prince Philip, Duke of Edinburgh.)
  • 1977 Sean Murray, Bethesda, Maryland, actor (Hocus Pocus, Harts of the West, Timothy McGee / NCIS ; JAG)
  • 1991 Shailene Woodley, Simi Valley, California, actress (The Secret Life of the American Teenager, Divergent, Snowden, Big Little Lies)

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“The first duty of a man is to think for himself.” ― José Martí
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HISTORICAL HAPPENINGS:

  • 1806 Explorer Lieutenant Zebulon Pike sees a distant mountain peak while near the Colorado foothills of the Rocky Mountains (it was later named Pikes Peak).
  • 1926 NBC on-air debut with a radio network of 24 stations.
  • 1939 In Washington, D.C., US President Franklin D. Roosevelt lays the cornerstone of the Jefferson Memorial.
  • 1956 The first film starring Elvis Presley, Love Me Tender, is released.
  • 1966 Gemini XII returns to Earth, splashing down safely in the Atlantic Ocean.
  • 1967 The only fatality of the X-15 program occurs during the 191st flight when Air Force test pilot Michael J. Adams loses control of his aircraft which is destroyed mid-air over the Mojave Desert.
  • 1969 Vietnam War: In Washington, D.C., 250,000-500,000 protesters staged a peaceful demonstration against the war, including a symbolic “March Against Death”.
  • 1969 In Columbus, Ohio, Dave Thomas opens the first Wendy’s restaurant.
  • 1971 Intel releases world’s first commercial single-chip microprocessor, the 4004.
  • 1989 Tornado on Airport Road in Huntsville, Alabama, killing 21 people and injuring nearly 500.
  • 1999 Popular virtual pets internet website Neopets released by British college students Adam Powell and Donna Williams.
  • 2001 Microsoft releases the Xbox, the company’s first video game console.

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After church on Sunday morning, a young boy suddenly announced to his mother, ”Mom, I’ve decided I’m going to be a minister when I grow up.”

”That’s okay with us,” the mother said, ”But what made you decide to be a minister?”

”Well,” the boy replied, ”I’ll have to go to church on Sunday anyway, and I figure it will be more fun to stand up and yell than to sit still and listen.”
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Returning from a trip to visit my grandmother in Canada, I was stopped by a state trooper in New York for exceeding the speed limit.

Grateful to have received a warning instead of a ticket, I gave him a small bag of my grandmother’s delicious chocolate-chip cookies and proceeded on my way.

A short time later, I was stopped by another trooper.

“What have I done?” I asked.

“Nothing,” the trooper said, smiling. “I heard you were passing out great chocolate-chip cookies.”
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ONE-LINERS: Camping Tips

– Take this simple test to see if you qualify for solo camping. Shine a flashlight into one ear. If the beam shines out the other ear, do not go into the woods alone.

– A two-man pup tent does not include two men or a pup.

– A potato baked in the coals for one hour makes an excellent side dish. A potato baked in the coals for three hours makes an excellent hockey puck.

– In emergency situations, you can survive in the wilderness by shooting small game with a slingshot made from the elastic waistband of your underwear.

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A wise old farmer went to town to buy a new pickup truck that he saw advertised in the paper for a certain price.

After telling the salesman which truck he wanted, they set down to do the paperwork.

The salesman handed the farmer the bill, and the farmer declared, “This isn’t the price I saw!”

The salesman went on to tell the old wise farmer how he was getting extras such as power steering, power brakes, power windows, special tires, etc. and that was what took the price up.

The farmer, needing the truck badly, paid the price and went home.

A few months later, the salesman called up the farmer and said, “My son is in 4-H and he needs a cow for a project. Do you have any for sale?”

The farmer replied, “Yes, I have a few cows I would sell for $500 apiece. Come and look at them and take your pick.”

The salesman said he and his son would be right out .

After spending a few hours in the field checking out all the farmer’s cows, the two decided on one and the salesman proceeded to write out a check for $500.

The farmer said, “Now wait a minute, that’s not the final price of the cow, you’re getting extras with it and you have to pay for that too”.

“What extras?” asked the salesman.

Below is the list the farmer gave the salesman for the final price of the cow

BASIC COW – 500.00
Two-tone exterior – 45.00
Extra stomach – 75.00
Product storing equipment – 60.00
Straw compartment – 120.00
4 spigots @$10 each – 40.00
Leather upholstery – 125.00
Dual horns – 45.00
Automatic fly swatter – 38.00
Fertilizer attachment – 185.00

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My husband, Bruce, had recommended his new dentist first visit, I filled out various forms. As usual, I used my middle name, Joy, instead of Margarette, my legal name.

As I was about to leave the office, the insurance clerk approached me. She had just pulled Bruce’s records and asked, “What is your relationship to Bruce?”

“He’s my husband.”

She studied the file with a worried expression. Then she looked at me and said nervously, “Do you know about Margarette?”
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WARNING! ENTERING THE PUN ZONE!

~ Don’t join dangerous cults, practice safe sects!
~ I thought I saw an eye doctor on an Alaskan island, but it turned out to be an optical Aleutian.
~ The roundest knight at King Arthur’s round table was Sir Cumference. He acquired his size from too much pi.

~ She was only a whiskey maker, but he loved her still.
~ The butcher backed into the meat grinder and got a little behind in his work.
~ A rubber band pistol was confiscated from algebra class because it was a weapon of math disruption.

~ No matter how much you push the envelope, it’ll still be stationery.
~ A dog gave birth to puppies near the road and was cited for littering.
~ A grenade thrown into a kitchen in France would result in Linoleum Blownapart.

~ Atheism is a non-prophet organization.
~ Two silk worms had a race. They ended up in a tie.
~ A hole has been found in the nudist camp wall. The police are looking into it.
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Sarah was reading a newspaper while her husband was engrossed in a game on TV. Suddenly, she burst out laughing.

“Listen to this, there’s a classified ad here where a guy is offering to swap his wife for a season tickets.”
“Hmmm,” her husband said, not bothering to look away from the game.

Sarah said teasingly, “Would you swap me for season tickets?”
“Absolutely not,” he said, “season’s more than half over!”

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Subject: The Cure

A woman visited her new ‘Managed Care’ doctor at a Health Maintenance Organization. After about 15 minutes with one of the new doctors, she went screaming down the hall. Another doctor stopped and asked her what the problem was, and she explained.

The second doctor went back to the first and said, “What’s is the matter with you? Mrs. Terry is 63 years old. She has four grown children & seven grandchildren, and you told her she was pregnant?”

The new doctor simply smiled and said, “Cured her hiccups though, didn’t it?”
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A college professor had the mysterious habit of removing a tennis ball from his jacket pocket as he walked into the lecture hall each morning. He would set it on the corner of the podium. After giving the day’s lecture he would pick up the tennis ball, place it into his jacket pocket, and leave the room.

No one ever understood why he did this, until one day …

A student fell asleep during the lecture. The professor didn’t miss a word of his lecture as he picked up the tennis ball and threw it, hitting the sleeping student squarely in the head.

The next day the professor walked into the room, reached into his jacket and removed a baseball.

No one ever fell asleep in his class again.
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Our church has a special service just for the children. They call this “children’s church.” My daughter usually stays in children’s church on Sunday mornings, but one Sunday she stayed with us to attend the regular adult service.

When Communion was served, she turned to her mother and whispered loudly, “The snack in children’s church is much better. And we get a lot more juice.”
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TODAY IN TRIVIA: How many honorary U.S. citizens are there? Honorary U.S. citizenship has been conferred only eight times: to British wartime Prime Minister Winston Churchill; Swedish diplomat Raoul Wallenberg, who saved at least 20,000 Jews from the Nazis; Pennsylvania founder William Penn and his wife, Hannah; and to Mother Teresa for her work around the world caring for the sick and destitute.

Also granted citizenship: the Marquis de Lafayette, a French general who led divisions of the Continental Army during the American Revolution; Casimir Pulaski who is considered one of the fathers of the American cavalry; and Bernardo de Galvez, considered by George Washington to be “a deciding factor in the outcome of the Revolutionary War” for his help in smuggling supplies to the Continentals.

~ When is “Everyman’s Birthday?” In many countries, it is the custom to wish friends a “Happy Birthday” on January 1st, rather than a “Happy New Year.” This day is nicknamed “Everyman’s Birthday,” and is considered the day when everyone becomes a year older, whether it’s their actual day of birth or not. Similarly, this practice is observed in horse racing. No matter when a race horse is born, they all “become” a year older on New Year’s Day, although there are no records explaining how or why this came to be.

~ How old is Bartram’s Garden? Starting from his farm near Philadelphia during the 1700s, John Bartram traveled north to Lake Ontario, south to Florida, and west to the Ohio River in search of plants and natural history specimens for his own botanic garden and for collectors at home and abroad. He and his son William are credited with identifying and introducing into cultivation more than 200 of America’s native plants. By 1765, Bartram’s international reputation earned him the notice of King George III who honored him as Royal Botanist, a position he held until his death in 1777. The Historic Bartram Garden is America’s oldest living botanical garden.

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QUIP OF THE DAY: By trying we can easily endure adversity. Another man’s, I mean. – Mark Twain

THAT’S (ALMOST) ALL FOLKS!

Thought for the day. . . “It isn’t as bad as you sometimes think it is. It all works out. Don’t worry. I say that to myself every morning. It all works out in the end. Put your trust in God, and move forward with faith and confidence in the future. The Lord will not forsake us. He will not forsake us. If we will put our trust in Him, if we will pray to Him, if we will live worthy of His blessings, He will hear our prayers.” ― Gordon B. Hinckley

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