“One’s life has value so long as one attributes value to the life of others, by means of love, friendship, and compassion” ― Simone de Beauvoir
TODAY – NOVEMBER 18th
322nd day of the year (323rd in leap years) with 43 days to follow.
Holidays for Today:
~ Married To A Scorpio Support Day
~ Mickey Mouse Day
~ National Princess Day
~ National Vichyssoise Day
~ Occult Day
~ Push-button Phone Day (commemorates the anniversary of the introduction of the push button phone by Bell Systems in the United States)
BIRTHDAYS ON THIS DATE:
- 1861 Dorothy Dix, American journalist (first advice columnist/ Dorothy Dix Talks) and author (Fables of the Elite, Mirandy)
- 1897 Patrick Blackett, London, England, physicist (cloud chambers, cosmic rays, paleomagnetism, nuclear reaction, Nobel 1948)
- 1901 George Gallup, Jefferson, Iowa, public opinion pollster (Gallup Poll)
- 1923 Alan B Shepard Jr, East Derry, New Hampshire, Rear Admiral USN/astronaut (first American in space / Mercury 3, 5th person to walk on the moon / Apollo 14)
- 1939 Margaret Atwood, Canadian poet and author (The Handmaid’s Tale, Oryx and Crake, The Blind Assassin, The Heart Goes Last)
- 1939 Brenda Vaccaro, Brooklyn, New York, actress (Midnight Cowboy, The Shape of Things, Once Is Not Enough, Sara, Capricorn One, You Don’t Know Jack, Gypsy)
- 1942 Linda Evans, Hartford, Connecticut, actor (The Big Valley, Hunter, Dynasty)
- 1943 Susan Sullivan, New York, New York, actress (Another World, Rich Man Poor Man, Falcon Crest, Dharma & Greg, Justice League, Castle [his mother])
- 1946 Alan Dean Foster, New York, New York, sci-fi & fantasy author (series: Humanx Commonwealth Universe. Spellsinger, The Taken), novelizations of screen scripts (Alien, The Black Hole, Krull, The Last Starfighter, The Chronicles of Riddick)
- 1950 Michael Swanwick, Schenectady, NY, sci-fi author (In the Drift, Vacuum Flowers, Stations of the Tide, Jack Faust, Bones of the Earth, The Dragons of Babel, Chasing the Phoenix)
- 1960 Elizabeth Perkins, Queens, New York, actress (Finding Nemo, Cats & Dogs, Weeds, How to Live with Your Parents)
- 1964 Rita Cosby, Brooklyn, New York, journalist (CBS Inside Edition) and author (Blonde Ambition, Quiet Hero)
- 1968 Owen Wilson, Dallas, Texas, actor (Night at the Museum: Battle of the Smithsonian, You, Me and Dupree, Cars)
- 1981 Maggie Stiefvater, Harrisonburg, Virginia, author (Series: Books of Faerie, The Wolves of Mercy Falls, The Raven Cycle)
- 1992 Nathan Kress, Glendale, California, actor (The Penguins of Madagascar, Babe: Pig in the City, Into the Storm, Lego Star Wars)
- 1997 Noah Ringer, Dallas, Texas, actor (The Last Airbender, Cowboys & Aliens)
“It may be important to great thinkers to examine the world, to explain and despise it. But I think it is only important to love the world, not to despise it, not for us to hate each other, but to be able to regard the world and ourselves and all beings with love, admiration and respect.” Hermann Hesse
- 1307 William Tell shoots apple off his son’s head.
- 1883 American and Canadian railroads institute five standard continental time zones, ending the confusion of thousands of local times.
- 1928 Walt Disney’s Mickey Mouse debuts in NY in “Steamboat Willie” – the first fully synchronized sound cartoon, directed by Walt Disney and Ub Iwerks, featuring the third appearances of cartoon characters Mickey Mouse and Minnie Mouse. This is also considered by the Disney corporation to be Mickey’s birthday.
- 1940 New York City’s Mad Bomber places his first bomb at a Manhattan office building used by Consolidated Edison.
- 1961 United States President John F. Kennedy sends 18,000 military advisors to South Vietnam.
- 1963 First push-button telephone goes into service.
- 1991 Moslem Shites release hostages Terry Waite and Thomas Sutherland.
- 1993 North American Free Trade Agreement (NAFTA) is ratified by the House of Representatives in the US.
- 1994 ”Star Trek VII – Generations,” premiered.
- 2003 In a 50-page, 4–3 decision, the Massachusetts Supreme Judicial Court rules that the state may not “deny the protections, benefits and obligations conferred by civil marriage to two individuals of the same sex who wish to marry.”
- 2013 NASA launches the MAVEN probe to Mars.
A policeman stops a lady and asks for her license. He says “Lady, it says here that you should be wearing glasses.”
The woman answered “Well, I have contacts.”
The policeman replied “I don’t care who you know! You’re getting a ticket!”
A man traveling on a train ask the ticket collector what time the train stops at Victoria.
“This train doesn’t stop at Victoria, it’s the express.”
“You are joking!, I NEED to get off at Victoria!”
“Sorry sir. This train will not stop at Victoria.”
“There must be something you can do.”
“Well there is one thing …”
“What? anything! I need to get off!”
“Well, I’ll get the driver to slow down and I’ll dangle you out the door and lower you onto the platform.”
“My God! Will that work?”
“It’s worth a try.”
The train approaches the platform at 50 mph. The ticket collector hangs the man in mid-air out the door. The man starts running! The man is running in mid-air.
“Run faster! Run faster!” The ticket collector lowers the man down.
The man’s feet touch the platform! Smoke flies of his shoes and his heel comes off. The man is running for his life!
The ticket collector lets go. The man is running at 30mph!
He’s made it! he begins to slow down. He’s still running at 20mph alongside the train as the other passengers watch in amazement. As the last carriage goes by, a hand grabs the man by the shirt collar and lifts him back onto the train.
As he’s being pulled into the carriage, he hears a voice say …”You’re lucky I was here to help! This train doesn’t even stop at Victoria!”
ONE-LINERS: Funny Sports Quotes . . .
~ New Orleans Saint RB George Rogers when asked about the upcoming season, “I want to rush for 1,000 or 1,500 yards, whichever comes first.”
~ Senior basketball player at the University of Pittsburgh, “I’m going to graduate on time, no matter how long it takes.”
~ “Shaquille O’Neal [basketball] on whether he had visited the Parthenon during his visit to Greece, “I can’t really remember the names of the clubs that we went to.”
~ Bill Peterson, a Florida State football coach, “You guys line up alphabetically by height.” And “You guys pair up in groups of three, then line up in a circle.”
~ Lou Duva, veteran boxing trainer, on the Spartan training regime of heavyweight Andrew Golota, “He’s a guy who gets up at six o’clock in the morning regardless of what time it is.”
~ Chuck Nevitt, North Carolina State basketball player, explaining to Coach Jim Valvano why he appeared nervous at practice, “My sister’s expecting a baby, and I don’t know if I’m going to be an uncle or an aunt.”
~ Frank Layden, Utah Jazz president, on a former player, “I told him, ‘Son, what is it with you? Is it ignorance or apathy?’ He said, ‘Coach, I don’t know and I don’t care.’
~ Torrin Polk, University of Houston receiver, on his coach, John Jenkins, “He treats us like men. He lets us wear earrings.”
~ Oiler coach, Bum Phillips, when asked by Bob Cost why he takes his wife on all road trips, Phillips responded, “Because she is too dang ugly to kiss good-bye!”
John, for heaven’s sake, why can’t you just talk to me once in awhile?” whined Mari.
“Huh?” John responded.
“Look around you!” she yells as she points around the room. “All these books. Your head is always buried in books. You don’t even know I’m alive!”
“Oh. I’m sorry.”
“You know, sometimes I wish I were a book. Then you’d at least look at me.”
“Hmmm,” John mumbled in deep thought, “that’s not a bad idea. Then I could take you to the library every few days and change you for something more interesting.”
A certain professor arrived late for a lecture to find a most uncomplimentary drawing of himself on the blackboard.
Fuming, he asked the class joker in the front row, “Who, pray, was responsible for this atrocity?”
The joker won tremendous prestige with his reply, “I really don’t know, but I strongly suspect its’ parents.”
pic of the day: Gore Canyon in the Rocky Mountains
Connie told her 4-year-old grandson, Dean, not to jump on the beds. After several warnings she punished him, explaining that should he fall, he would hurt himself badly.
Several minutes passed… and he was back to jumping on the beds. Connie said, “Dean, you weren’t jumping on the beds again, were you?”
He stood with his little head dropped low and said, “I’m trying, but it’s so hard to quit.”
Computer novices may feel like they’re alone these days, but the following call to IBM’s help center show there are plenty of people out there who still are inching onto the information superhighway.
After a caller gave a technician her PC’s serial number, he scanned a database of registered users and responded, “I see you have an Aptiva” desktop unit.
Before he could say another word, the caller shrieked and said she’d be right back. When the customer returned, the technician asked if she was all right. The caller responded: “Had I realized you could see me, I never would have telephoned in my bathrobe.”
WARNING! ENTERING THE PUN ZONE!
~ A Freudian slip is when you say one thing but mean your mother
~ Cinderella was thrown off the basketball team because she ran away from the ball.
~ Compare a prisoner in shackles to one unshackled. It’s the difference of a pinion.
~ My chiropractor is no comic, but he really cracks me up.
~ A man recently invented a knife that cuts four loaves of bread simultaneously.
He calls his invention a four-loaf cleaver.
I took my daughter to the park one day while she was learning to read. She asked me, “Why would anyone want to put me in a garbage can?”
“Why do you think someone might?”
“There’s a sign by the bench that says I shouldn’t let anyone put me in the garbage.”
Sure enough, listed there in the park rules was one that said, “Refuse to be put in garbage can.”
Things I’d Like to Hear, Just Once
From my auto mechanic:
“That part is much less expensive than I thought.”
“I’ve never seen anyone maintain his car as well as you do.”
“You could get that done more cheaply at the garage down the street.”
“It was just a loose wire. No charge.”
From my son’s preschool teacher:
“Everyone misbehaved today except Michael.”
“Michael traded his candy bar for carrot sticks.”
“I wish we had 20 Michaels.”
From a contractor:
“Whoever worked on this before sure knew what he was doing.”
“I think I came in a little high on that estimate.”
From my dentist:
“I think you’re flossing too much.”
“I won’t ask you any questions until I take the pick out of your mouth.”
From a restaurant server:
“I think it’s presumptuous for a waiter to volunteer his name, but since you ask, it’s Tim.”
“I was slow and inattentive. I cannot accept any tip.”
“Nice dog. What’s its name?” I asked my friend’s 10-year old son.
“Bob,” he said.
“And what’s your cat’s name?”
“Well, how do you keep them straight?” I asked.
“Well, one is Bob Cat and the other is Bob Barker,” the boy answered.
“Go ahead and tell him your rabbit’s name,” his father suggested.
The kid smiled and said… “Dennis Hopper.”
Did you hear about the kid who was pulled over for speeding?
The cop got out of his car and the young man rolled down his window.
“I’ve been waiting for you all day,” the cop said.
The guy replied, “Yeah, well I got here as fast as I could.”
When the cop finally stopped laughing, he sent the kid on his way without a ticket.
TODAY IN TRIVIA: How much was John’s white suit worth? John Travolta’s famous white suit from the film Saturday Night Fever (1977) sold at auction for an incredible $145,500 in 1995.
~ What does Mickey Mouse Day celebrate? It commemorates the debut of a lovable mouse that was once a rabbit called Oswald. From a rabbit named Oswald to a mouse named Mortimer, eventually, the squeaky-voiced rodent was dubbed Mickey. He flopped in two animated short films without any success. Then on November 18, 1928, Mickey’s star was born. The first animation synchronized to music and sound effects, Steamboat Willie premiered in New York.
~ Why is there a Married To A Scorpio Support Day? Scorpios, born between October 23 and November 22, are said to have many positive traits, such as being disciplined, helpful, and without fear. But, there are other traits they are said to have which may make them difficult to be married to such as being intense, aggressive when provoked, deeply emotional, and pessimistic. They also tend to hold a grudge, like alone time and get annoyed if don’t. Those are the traits that engendered a support day for their spouses.
~ How long have people been celebrating the new year? The celebration of the new year is the oldest of all holidays. It was first observed in ancient Babylon about 4,000 years ago. In the years around 2000 B.C., Babylonians celebrated the beginning of a new year on what is now March 25, although they themselves had no written calendar.
~ How much did W.C. drink? According to witnesses, film comedian W. C. Fields drank two quarts of martinis a day, even when working on the movie set. In his final years, he suffered from cirrhosis and kidney trouble, and had to wear heavy makeup in his last films to conceal the swollen veins and “gin blossoms” on his face and nose.
QUIP OF THE DAY: I intend to live forever. So far, so good. – Steven Wright
THAT’S (ALMOST) ALL FOLKS!
Thought for the day. . . “Before I can live with other folks I’ve got to live with myself. The one thing that doesn’t abide by majority rule is a person’s conscience.” ― Harper Lee, To Kill a Mockingbird