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October 1st

A strong nation, like a strong person, can afford to be gentle, firm, thoughtful, and restrained. It can afford to extend a helping hand to others. It is a weak nation, like a weak person, that must behave with bluster and boasting and rashness and other signs of insecurity. -Jimmy Carter, 39th US President, Nobel laureate


TODAY – OCTOBER 1st

274th day of the year (275th in leap years) with 91 days to follow.

Holidays for Today:
~ National Black Dog Day
~ National Fire Pup Day
~ National Hair Day
~ National Homemade Cookies Day
~ World Vegetarian Day
~ International Day of Older Persons
~ Adopt a Shelter Dog Month
~ National Pet CBD Month
~ National Sarcastic Awareness Month
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BIRTHDAYS ON THIS DATE:

  • 1881 William Edward Boeing, Detroit, Michigan, aviation pioneer (founded Boeing Company)
  • 1920 Walther Matthau, NYC, New York, actor (The Odd Couple, Bad News Bears, The Fortune Cookie)
  • 1924 Jimmy Carter, Plains, Georgia, 39th President of the United States
  • 1927 Tom Bosley, Chicago, Illinois, actor (Happy Days, Father Dowling Mysteries, Murder She Wrote)
  • 1928 George Peppard, Jr., Detroit, Michigan, actor (Breakfast at Tiffany’s, The Carpetbaggers, Banacek, Hannibal on The A-Team)
  • 1930 Richard Harris, Irish actor, singer, director, author (Camelot, A Man Called Horse, Gladiator, Dumbledore in 1st two Harry Potter films)
  • 1946 Tim O’Brien, Austin, Minnesota, author (Going After Cacciato, The Things They Carried)
  • 1950 Randy Quaid, Houston, Texas, actor (The Last Detail, LBJ: The Early Years, Independence Day, Brokeback Mountain, Real Time)
  • 1968 Jay Underwood, Minneapolis, Minnesota, actor (The Boy Who Could Fly, Uncle Buck, Afterglow, The Sonny & Cher Story)
  • 1974 Christian Borle, Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania, actor (Smash, Peter and the Starcatcher, The Bounty Hunter, Blackhat)
  • 1974 Sherri Saum, Dayton, Ohio, actress (Sunset Beach, Rescue Me, The Fosters)
  • 1986 Jurnee Smollett, NYC, New York, actress (Jack, Eve’s Bayou, The Great Debaters, Friday Night Lights, The Defenders, True Blood, Underground, Lovecraft Country)

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“Love truth, but pardon error.” – Voltaire
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HISTORICAL HAPPENINGS:

  • 1880 Thomas Edison opened the first electric lamp factory.
  • 1890 The U.S. Congress established Yosemite National Park.
  • 1891 Stanford University opens in California.
  • 1908 The Model T car by Ford is placed on the market at a price of $825.
  • 1910 A large bomb destroys the Los Angeles Times building in downtown Los Angeles, California, killing 21.
  • 1940 The first superhighway in the U.S., the Pennsylvania Turnpike, opened to traffic.
  • 1957 In God We Trust on first appeared on U.S. paper currency.
  • 1962 The Tonight Show starring Johnny Carson is first broadcast.
  • 1969 The sound barrier is broken for the first time by the Concorde.
  • 1971 Walt Disney World opens near Orlando, Florida.
  • 1982 EPCOT Center opens at Walt Disney World near Orlando, Florida.
  • 1992 Cartoon Network begins broadcasting.
  • 2017 Fifty-eight people are killed and 851 others injured in a mass shooting on a music festival in Las Vegas. The gunman commits suicide when police locate him.

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Two retired friends were sitting on the front porch discussing life.
George said, “Hey Ralph, you and your wife Sherrie have been married for 30 years. You both always seem so mellow and happy. Tell me, what IS your secret to having such a happy marriage?”
Ralph answered, “Well, I’ll tell you George. There are just three words that I say to my wife almost every day of my life.”

“I think I know those three words,” laughed George.
“Yep, it’s probably obvious,” said Ralph. And with his hand patting the middle of his chest, Ralph looked to the clouds and said, “A day seldom goes by that I don’t look at Sherrie and say, ‘I was wrong.’ ”
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A speeding motorist was caught by radar from a police helicopter in the sky.
An officer pulled him over and began to issue a traffic ticket.

“How did you know I was speeding?” the frustrated driver asked.
The police officer pointed somberly toward the sky.
“You mean,” asked the motorist, “that even He is against me?”
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ONE-LINERS: Words from Women

~ I base most of my fashion taste on what doesn’t itch. – Gilda Radner
~ Behind every successful man is a surprised woman. – Maryon Pearson
~ Our struggle today is not to have a female Einstein get appointed as an assistant professor. It is for a woman schlemiel to get as quickly promoted as a male schlemiel. – Bella Abzug

~ Some of us are becoming the men we wanted to marry. – Gloria Steinem
~ I have yet to hear a man ask for advice on how to combine marriage and a career. – Gloria Steinem
~ In politics, if you want anything said, ask a man; if you want anything done, ask a woman. – Margaret Thatcher

~ I think–therefore I’m single. – Lizz Winstead
~ I am a marvelous housekeeper. Every time I leave a man I keep his house. – Zsa Zsa Gabor
~ If men can run the world, why can’t they stop wearing neckties? How intelligent is it to start the day by tying a little noose around your neck? – Linda Ellerbee

~ Sometimes I wonder if men and women really suit each other. Perhaps they should live next door and just visit now and then. – Katharine Hepburn
~ I never married because there was no need. I have three pets at home which answer the same purpose as a husband. I have a dog which growls every morning, a parrot which swears all afternoon and a cat that comes home late at night. – Marie Corelli
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A young American tourist goes on a guided tour of a creepy old castle. At the end of the tour the guide asks her how she enjoyed it. She admits to being a bit worried about seeing a ghost in some of the dark cobwebby rooms and passages.
“Don’t worry” says the guide, “I’ve never seen a ghost all the time I’ve been here.”

“How long is that?” asks the girl.
“About three hundred years.”
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Felix, my husband, was playing golf with our town’s fire chief when he hit a ball into the rough. As Felix headed for the brush to find his ball, the chief warned him, “Be careful, the rattlesnakes are out.”
The chief explained that calls had been coming in all week requesting assistance with removing the snakes.

“You’ve got to be kidding,” Felix replied in astonishment. “People actually call the fire department to help them with rattlesnakes? What do you say to them?”
“Well,” said the chief, “the first thing I ask is, ‘Is it on fire?'”
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PIC OF THE DAY: Lady Slipper Blooms
Lady Slipper photo
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“Doctor, I think my wife has laryngitis.”

“Bring her into the office and I’ll see what I can do to treat the condition.”

“Actually, I was hoping you could tell me how to prolong it.”
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After his recent stay in the hospital, Pa was particularly irritable, especially regarding food. At a nearby restaurant he stopped for a quick meal and the waiter provided a bowl of soup.

As the waiter turned away to return to the kitchen Pa stopped him, calling: “Waiter!”
“Yes ,sir, is there something wrong?”

“The soup. Taste it,” replied Pa.
“I beg your pardon, Sir?”

“Taste it.”
“But, Sir, I can assure you that the soup is excellent.”

“Taste it,” Pa persisted.
“Sir, the soup was made this morning of the finest ingredients.”

“Taste it!”
The exasperated waiter finally relented. “All right, Sir, I’ll taste it.” Then after a pause he said, “Where is the spoon?”

To which Pa replied triumphantly, “Ah ha … ”
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WARNING! ENTERING THE PUN ZONE!

During Nicaragua’s war between the Sandinistas and the Contras, an American speech therapist decided to help the Contras.
After his arrival, he spoke with an officer in the army and asked, “What can I do to help?”
“You’re in speech therapy?” was the reply. “How about helping with some Contra diction?”
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Weird Labor Math . . . The year is made of 365 days having 24 hours, 12 of which are night time hours which add up to 182 days.

This leaves you with 183 days of work minus 52 Sundays which leaves you 131 days to work minus 52 Saturdays which leaves you 79 days to work and there are four hours each day set aside for eating which adds to 60 days which leaves you 19 days for working, and are entitled to 15 days for your vacation which leaves you 4 days left for work minus 3 days usually taken off due to illness or other emergencies, which leaves you one day to work which happens to be a Labor day, which is a holiday.
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“My mother wanted me to go to church to meet women.
That’s wrong, ain’t it? ‘Praise the Lord! Hey, how ya doing? Nice dress. Look, I’m going to go over there and get some of this wine and crackers, want some?'” – Warren Hutcherson
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The lawyer was cross-examining a witness.
“Isn’t it true,” he bellowed, “that you were I given $500.00 to throw this case?”

The witness did not answer. Instead, he just stared out the window as though he hadn’t heard the question. The attorney repeated himself, again getting the same reaction – no response.
Finally, the judge spoke to the witness, “Please answer the question.”
“Oh,” said the startled witness, “I thought he was talking to you.”
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The children were lined up in the cafeteria of a Catholic elementary school for lunch. At the head of the table was a large pile of apples. The nun made a note, and posted on the apple tray:
“Take only ONE. God is watching.”

Moving further along the lunch line, at the other end of the table was a large pile of chocolate chip cookies.
A child had written a note, “Take all you want. God is watching the apples.
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A high-school geometry teacher started a lesson on triangles by reading a theorem. “If an angle is an exterior angle of a triangle, then its measure is greater than the measure of either of its corresponding remote interior angles.”
He noticed that one student wasn’t taking notes and asked him why.
“Well,” the student replied sincerely, “I was waiting for you to start speaking English.”
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TODAY IN TRIVIA: How long can a dead sponge hang around? Dead sponges can resist bacterial decay for more than five years when submerged in fresh water.

~ What family does a marmot belong to? The groundhog is a member of the rodent family. The typical adult groundhog can weigh approximately 8 to 14 pounds and average about 22 inches in length. Groundhogs are also known as “woodchucks,” “whistle pigs,” and “marmots.”

~ How long would a 19th century Londoner live? The average life span of London residents in the middle of the 19th century was 27 years. For members of the working class, that number dropped to 22 years.

~ What did James demonstrate for George? James Ramsey invented a steam-driven motorboat in 1784. He ran it on the Potomac River, and the event was witnessed by George Washington.

~ Why is there a National Black Dog Day? It’s to encourage the adoption of a dog in the darker shades. Black dogs are less likely to be adopted for no other reason than their coloring. Regardless of behavior, size, breeding, personality, or age, the phenomenon persists.
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QUIP OF THE DAY: Coffee: Starter fluid for the morning impaired.

THAT’S (ALMOST) ALL FOLKS!

Thought for the day. . . Be more concerned with your character than your reputation, because your character is what you really are while your reputation is merely what others think you are. – John Wooden

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